Time for change

 It is time for change!  Big or little, I don't know yet!   But this weight loss journey has been full of ups and downs and lots of changes along the way and I think that another change is imminent! But what changes are coming?  

Weekly Weigh In

Let me start with my weekly weigh in.  I officially weigh in on Fridays and I weighed in at the same weight that I was last week.  To the ounce.  I have been maintaining for the last few weeks.  It is NOT for lack of trying.  I am eating within a caloric range that should have me losing mad weight in a healthy manner.  But it is just not working.   Furthermore, it is seriously depressing and disheartening!  I can't tell you how many tears I've cried recently over this journey.   Sure, I know; a maintain is a victory.  Still being here and present is a victory.  But it's a shallow victory and not one that is bolstering me for the journey still ahead of me!

Changes

So what changes am I going to make?  I'm not exactly sure.  I simply know that what I am doing right now is NOT working.  Sure, I'm losing weight here and there.  But it is in fits and starts.  I will have a week where my calories intake is not that bad and I gain.  There seems to be no rhyme or reason.   It is making me look deeper and I came up with a few different thoughts.

**  I am cheating on my plan and have no willpower.  Even as I write this, I know that that is not the case.  I am quite honest with myself and the food that I put into my daily food/calorie tracker.   My calories that I report are what I am eating!

** My calories in versus calories out plan is no longer a plan that is working for me.  This made me wonder if I should go back to trying Weight Watchers.  I lost a heck of a lot of weight years ago on WW.  In fact, I made it to lifetime status with the program.  However, I regained and while I tried to lose with the program I needed a change so I stepped away.   More recently, in early 2020 I rejoined WW...it was right before the pandemic and I stopped shortly after the pandemic reared it's ugly head and went back to calorie counting.   

**I have learned valuable things.  Complex carbs are my enemy.....where my body needs to be in terms of calories for optimal weight loss.....etc.  Shouldn't I be able to come up with a plan that is satisfying to my soul and my body??

** Exercise is good for my fitness levels.  My body needs exercise.  But I know that weight is lost in the kitchen and not the gym.

So where does my thoughts lead me?  It is leading me to reading books and researching.  It is leading me to look for a happy medium and a long term solution to my problems.  I will not.....NEVER.....do any fad or crazy diet plan.  That is not sustainable.  My goal is health and that is my first priority.  BUt I'm looking....I am searching....I am reading.   

I am currently reading a book that has made me feel better about where I am and my frustration levels.  It is in the opening chapters but it makes a lot of sense and I am hopeful that it will give me lots of amazing insight for getting back on track in a way that works for my life and my body!   I'm still reading though!  

Stay tuned....change is coming.  It has to.  For me to continue to do the same thing in this weight loss journey is sheer madness.  It's not working...which means that SOMETHING has to change if I want to change!

Adapting for Success

 Weight loss…..boy is this journey full of adaptations and changes!  I think I have it figured out and then it hits me hard and I realize that I have no clue what I’m doing.  These last months have been this way.  I have been grasping at straws.  Resisting change.  And just not working my weight loss journey to my advantage.  Actually, I’ve gone backwards in this journey!  Yes, I’ve gained weight.  (at the highest 19 pounds to be exact).  I decided that it was time to change and adapt!

Running as an Overweight Woman and the changes Coming my Way

I have enjoyed running and I have been so anxious to get back to it.  So about two weeks ago I started.  I felt great going out there, even though it was tough and slow!  But almost immediately I started to feel some pain. I don’t mean the normal ‘I’m just sore from a workout’ pain.  I mean pain…..leg buckling from the issue pain.  But I had made a vow to run….so I kept running!  I wanted to run. 

After about two weeks though I had come to the conclusion in my mind that at my current weight I just needed to step back from running for a bit.  I had never run at this weight (maybe for a good reason).  I knew that I was not helping my body but rather beating it up.   I resisted giving up.   But then one day when we were walking after work, my knee buckled again and I could barely walk for a bit.  Jason actually offered to go get the car to come pick me up. (I said no and soldiered through.)  In the ensuing conversation he gently suggested that I need to lay off running for a bit.  At least until I get some of the weight off of my body.  He wants me healthy….not broken.  I have to agree….just two weeks of running was breaking me!  

So those new running shoes that I have worn just 2 times are going into their box and going to sit on the shelf for a few weeks/months until my body can handle it!   For now, it’s low impact stuff like the bike and walking!

Adapting my Weigh in Day

Sooo…here is the biggie. I have been talking a lot lately about my calories and how I need to keep my calories at a lower level.   That was the first epiphany.  I was spot on with that statement.  I had to figure that out and accept it.   Lesson accepted.  The next epiphany was realized and accepting that some of my struggles are due to the lack of consistency with my eating.  My calorie count is higher on the weekends.  I typically struggle and gain a bit during the weekends.   I see the weight pop up and I clean up my act during the work week (when it is easier for me to stay on track).  I can ‘usually’ recoup my weight gain and show a maintain for the week.  It is a true see saw action! 

Years ago I was going to Weight Watchers on Tuesday nights.  My weekend at that time was Sunday through Monday.  Thus, I had to be spot on through my weekend in order to have a decent weigh in on Tuesday evening.  Yes…..that goes against conventional thought doesn’t it???   But do you know what?  It worked for me.  That looming weigh in kept me in line.  I was so much more cognizant of my weekend eating.  I kept it in line.  I wasn’t tempted to ‘go crazy because I have the whole week to fix it”.  

So with that said, I am changing my official weigh in day.  For the last few years I have been weighing in on Friday mornings. (And it is all downhill from there.)  No more…….I will be changing my weigh in day to Monday.  This first week is going to be tough because I have two weekends to navigate.  But I have a weigh in looming and I know that I can do it!

Change isn’t easy.  It is much easier to stick with what we are doing.  It is the path of least resistance.  However, that path doesn’t always bring us success.  I am changing and I am adapting because I want success!!!!!!

(Ohhhh and I maintained this week!)