Friday, December 13, 2019

Birthday week

This week was my birthday week.  How in the world can I be 47 years old?  I certainly don’t feel like I’m 47 in my heart and mind,  that’s for sure!  But alas....that is my age and I shall wear it with pride.

But anyway, my birthday week....

We both took some time off work and had a four day weekend, which was heavenly! We  visited family and ran some errands but we also took the time to go away for a short trip.  We went to Lancaster, PA.  It was good to get away!

Jason didn’t know much about the Amish so we went to the Amish Village.

We did the Sturgis Pretzel Tour and learned the history of Sturgis Pretzels...the oldest continuously operating pretzel company.  

We hit up a bunch of antique shops!

I even bought myself a gift...for my dollhouse!

And we did some shopping at a few places....hey a girl needs some shoofly pie....and some Wilbur Chocolate!!

We had a great time!

The problem?  Food....shoofly pie is not exactly low calorie!  Neither is chocolate!   

We went back to work on Wednesday and I was determined to get back on track.  I actually wrapped and froze the rest of the shoofly pie.

But then failed anyway when my coworkers arrived at my desk with this monster piece of cake!

I honestly stared at the cake for an hour or more before I caved and ate it...I was only going to have a few bites (and tried to split it with coworkers) but ended up eating the whole super rich and sugary piece! Oops!

I’m barely hanging onto my weight....and not doing all that well with it....November was rough with a gain...and for December this far I feel like I’m hanging on by a thread with my weight teetering on a ‘maintain’ one day and a ‘gain’ the next day.

I’m determined to live a balance...and this week the balance fell more toward the indulgent side.  While that is not good for my weight, it is the balance that my mind and heart needs.   Furthermore, I know that I can still balance it out by getting right back on track!  all is not lost!!










Wednesday, December 11, 2019

Reflections about 2019

As the year comes to an end I have taken the time to reflect upon the year behind me and to look forward to the year ahead!

I can't call 2019 a totally successful year in terms of weight loss.  I got more serious about my efforts...and that was good!  But in the grand scheme of things I didn't lose much.   Wait.....I LOST....and that is what is important.  Right now it is looking as if I will be down about 10-15 pounds....depending on how the rest of December goes.  So that is a victory.  ANY pound down is a good one!

I didn't quite kick butt on the bike...but I did make some progress.  Exercise continues to be spotty and hit or miss.  However there are some things that may be changing!

My big thoughts came into play when I started to look forward to 2020.   I want to dedicate my 2020 to making me a better me.  This encompasses weight, fitness, work life and everything.  I want to be a better person in every way at this time next year!





I have a video that I put together with some of my reflections and my plans and hopes for the future.  Feel free to watch!   If you have a youtube channel consider yourself tagged.  Just let me know so I can come watch your video!

So what was your big accomplishments of 2019?   What do you want to accomplish in 2020?

This is a lifelong journey.  It is a lifelong quest to learn.  It is an adventure!  We reflect and we move forward and this is the perfect time to do that!

Sunday, December 08, 2019

November Review

Here it is more than a full week into December and I haven't talked about my goals for November OR my goals for December.  How remiss am I?   So here we go!

My November Goals were as follows:
1.  Track every bite of food!  I am proud to announce that I did manage to track each and every bite of food! WIN!!!
2.  Put money into my savings. (The tweak for November is to hold steady on savings...I have some expenses I still need to cover in relation to the car issues!) 
 I managed to hold steady!  I did not dip into my savings at all this month!  I didn't ADD to my savings but I didn't deplete it any more!
3.  Weigh less than I do now!  I don't care if it's a measly ounce...I want to weigh less!  Yeah, this didn't happen.  I GAINED weight in November....a fair amount!
4.  Do something active (a walk suffices) at least 3 times a week and aim for at least three sessions of formal activity (bike ride, run, hike) a week!    The first two weeks I was awesome...and then I totally fell apart!
5. Keep my eating in check for at least 6 days a week.   Once again, the first two weeks I did great....and then I fell apart and my calories were up between 1500 and 2000 each day!
6.  Walk and average of 5000 steps  per day. (total monthly steps divided by the days in the month....bike ride days on the trail are exempt from the 5K step goal...cuz it's hard to get  steps when you are riding)   I somehow squeaked this one out!!!  BARELY!!!!!  Like literally, my average was 5001!

So here we are in December.  My goals will be remaining the same...with one or two small tweaks.

1.  Track every bite of food!
2.  Put money into my savings.  The tweak for December is to once again MAINTAIN my savings....do not dip into it further. 
3.  Weigh less than I do now!  I don't care if it's a measly ounce...I want to weigh less!   I am tweaking this to be 'maintain my weight' for this month!  Hey, it's a busy month with the holidays and birthdays in my family.
4.  Do something active (a walk suffices) at least 3 times a week and aim for at least three sessions of formal activity (bike ride, run, hike) a week!  
5. Keep my eating in check for at least 6 days a week.   
6.  Walk and average of 5000 steps  per day. (total monthly steps divided by the days in the month....bike ride days on the trail are exempt from the 5K step goal...cuz it's hard to get  steps when you are riding)

There you have it!   I have my goals set for December.  Now it's time to rock them!

Monday, December 02, 2019

Back on track

The last few weeks of this weight loss journey have been rough!  I have gained a fair amount of weight!  It’s infuriating!  But it is the story of my last few weeks!

Now lets be real here.  I haven’t gone off the rails and eaten thousands and thousands of calories over my goal!  Not at all!  But I have eaten over my caloric goal on many days...my goal is around 1200 to 1500 calories a day.  I have been around 1700 to 2000 calories most days.  So definitely NOT crazy eating!   So I personally feel 8 pounds is unwarranted!  But it is what it is!


Yesterday started a new month....and I’m ready to rock this new month.  Even with lots of weight loss obstacles!   I can do it!

So what obstacles do I have this month?  

* Well first up is my birthday!  (How on the world will I be 47 years old??). It’s hard to say no to my own birthday cake!  My birthday comes with a four day weekend from work...and I struggle more on weekends with my eating!  Oh and we will be going away for a night or two during that weekend!  ~~sigh~~

* Speaking of birthdays...December is birthday month in our family...we have two more birthdays to celebrate!  Three if you count my fathers birthday...though he is no longer with us.  :( 

* Christmas potluck at work....food galore!  

* Christmas Eve...Jason and I celebrate at home

* Christmas Day celebrations with our families.

* A second long weekend...5 days at Christmas...once again...difficult to keep in line on the weekends!

* whatever random celebrations and events that pop up!

So it won’t be an easy month!   But I am determined to lost SOMETHING this month!  I am focused and I can do it!!!

Tuesday, November 26, 2019

Weight loss journey gone wrong

It’s confession time! Uhhh yeah, I think the title says it all!  This weight loss journey has taken a wrong turn!
 I am so struggling to get back on track!  I want to!  Oh how I want to!   I am ready to.   But....woah...I just had an epiphany  while I was writing my confessions.   Like right when I wrote the word woah It all became clear to me!  

I have a food addiction.   Over the past few months I’ve actually had a pretty good handle on my addiction.  I have been in control.  I have managed.  And while it hasn’t been fast, I have been losing.  Queue in the sound of tires coming to a screeching halt!  Yes, and then I hit that wall.  I gained unexpectedly.  I gained 4 pounds unexpectedly!  And I took a mini vacation from weight loss.   And that mini vacation set the addiction free.   

Oh I’m still in the game.  I still am working on losing the weight.  But more of my time is spent in regrets for eating what I ate!   Seriously, I sit there and KNOW I shouldn’t eat something!  Yet a few minutes later...almost without any control over myself I find myself eating said item!  I’ve lost control!

So back to square one.....controlling the addiction!   This is hard work...and a total mental game.  But I know I can do it!  I am going to starting to get myself back under control at the most impossible time....two days before thanksgiving!   Two weeks before my birthday....one month before Christmas!   But I can do this!!!



Friday, November 22, 2019

What a week!

This week was a rough one!    I just wasn’t mentally in the mind game of losing weight!   I fear what the scales are going to say!

So why was this week rough?   

Well....to start off.   That large weight gain that I feel was largely unwarranted really threw me for a loop and I kinda threw up my hands and said ‘I just don’t care’.   Luckily for me I didn’t totally stop caring...but it was bad enough!   I ate more food then I should have!  I ate mode junk than I should have!   I just stopped caring!  Luckily that mindset only lasted half of the week!  But it was enough I’m sure!   So yeah, I had a bit of a vacation from weight loss this week.

On Thursday my work had our annual thanksgiving dinner.  The company has the main portion of the meal catered and we bring (are supposed to bring...it’s crazy how many people don’t feel the need to participate) the desserts and drinks!   I feel as if I did pretty good with my choices...but I did indulge in a bit of dessert!  

Exercise?   It’s cold!!!!   We didn’t do ANYTHING active over the weekend!   I didn’t run after work....but I have a valid reason for not running!    There was some ‘incident’ at our apartment complex!  It was bad enough that they put flyers on all of our doors and sent us all emails advising us that there was an incident and that we need to be aware of our surrounds...uhhhhh ok!  Oh and then it threw in a sentence saying ‘don’t open the door to strangers either’. It was a very ambiguous...it could have been any nefarious act!  Jason’s comment was that he wished they gave us a bit more information....so we knew exactly where to be extra vigilant.   Meanwhile...we are in the early stages of pondering getting an exercise bike/spin bike for our house...something to help progress our biking skills/endurance and keep us active this winter.   Problem is...I just bought a car and I’m a bit tighter on my money right now.  Hmmm. So I’m looking at some of the cheaper alternatives to the good ones.   Because sure...if I could afford the peloton bike or Nordic track one...I would certainly go with those!  But....

I have walked outside on a few days during my lunch break...so that’s a plus!!!   




I haven’t given up.  I just hit a bump in the road.  This is part of the journey to lose weight.  And the fact that I got back up and started to care again after my vacation from losing weight is the victory!   I’m still in this game baby!!!!

Monday, November 18, 2019

Out of nowhere

Last week was....well....ok les just get to it!

I had  been training new hires at my job for about 2-3 months.  All of the classes are through training and last week I went back to my normal job.   It was interesting to be doing the actual work again after such a long break.  The first day or two I was still relatively slow with the work but by mid week I had picked up some other projects and tasks and by the end of the week I was so busy that I could barely breathe.  Yup...crazy busy!   It makes the time go fast for sure!  I’m tied to my desk though...not walking around a training room and on my feet all day.  So that was a small adjustment!

The weather turned nasty!  It was cold!   Ok Monday was super nice with the temps in the mid to upper 60’s!  But by Wednesday we had days with a high in the 30’s.   Ok, that’s a wild fluctuation!   And I caved and didn’t walk at all!  Nope!    Furthermore, I didn’t get that second run in after work either!  I thought about it...but the cold really played a number on me!
So this week...this week I am doing it!  I’ve got to!!!

I did a thanksgiving collaboration video last week.  It is where a bunch of you tubers get together and all post videos of similar things.  This collab was a lightened you thanksgiving dish. We all chose a dish (or two) to make that was healthier than the original version.  I made a caramel apple salad (more desserty than anything....8oz cool whip, small box of butterscotch instant pudding, large can of undrained crushed pineapple, two apple peeled and chopped....mix it all together....makes eight servings....72 calories a serving) and I ate it in 4 days.  So about 150 extra calories a day.  Not the end of the world right???

When I stepped on the scales for my official weigh in I was sickened!  I gained a lot of weight!  Like over four pounds!    What?  Nope, it’s not that time of the month!   And yes I counted my calories.  I was a bit high...I aim for between 1300 and 1500 calories a day...I was right at about 1700 calories for a few days. So not crazy high.   And not high enough to warrant a 4 plus pound gain!  Crazy I tell ya!

Admittedly I gave up a bit the day that I had my weigh in.   Seriously...why bother when the scales are going to do what they want to do.  But that day was only one day (and my normal cheat day/meal...so not too out of the normal) and I am back on track.   (The scales went down a pound after that ‘I don’t care say’. But not by a whole bunch).  I’m still in this.   I have really important reasons to lose weight.  Most importantly my health...I want to be fit and healthy....but I have valid reasons and a definite goal for some weight loss....which is unnamed and secret now...but hopefully be revealed sooner rather than later!!!

A more clear view of my last week and my exact weight (I am laying in bed typing this and can’t remember the numbers of my exact gain). can be seen on my YouTube channel. So that’s the latest report in my weight loss journey.   Back to work today!