Friday, March 20, 2020

Time to readjust and change

I am drowning.  I am drowning big time!   I have so many plans.  I have so many dreams.  I am full of amazing ideas!   Seriously awesome ideas.   I am so gung ho to start them….and I do.  But then I find myself drowning in a sea of ideas and half started projects or as is the case right now……so many projects that I am struggling to find the time to maintain these projects.  I find myself running like a chicken with my head cut off as I struggle to maintain the level of projects that I desire.  And it’s not happening.  Something always gets lost in the shuffle.  Most importantly, I get lost in the shuffle and that is not what I want.


  I am working on living a healthy happy life and being the best me possible.  That means that I need to sometimes reevaluate my life, my priorities, my commitments.    And before I get into this, let me tell you that this is a hard post to write.  I started the year 2020 with a word of the year.  Commitment.  Part of me feels like I am failing and not being committed, but the other side of me knows that something needs to change because what I am doing is losing its ‘fun’ appeal and that is a problem.


So let me start with this website.   I started Beliefinmyself many years ago.  (Was it really 2006???  Where has time gone.)  I started it mainly as my own personal journal of my weight loss journey.  I wrote when and what I wanted to.  I didn’t care about a schedule or anything like that.  I wrote what was in my heart when my mind told me to write it!  But I stuck with pretty much weight loss only!  This site was for weight loss only and my life did not intrude.  But over the years I started to include some aspects of my life but I still did not overly combine my life, even though life and weight loss go hand in hand.  About two or three years ago I decided that I needed to write with a purpose.  So I set up a schedule of posting on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. It worked for me.  It helped keep me accountable for my weight loss.   It kept me writing.   I was happy with that.   All was going well!


Way back in 2015 I started a second blog.  This second blog was for my love of miniatures.  It was a place for me to go to talk about my attempts at ‘dollhousing’ and creating my own miniatures.  Once again I wrote when I had something going on and when I felt the urge to post.  This blog turned out to be used heavily on my part because people ALWAYS want to see my miniatures and it was easy for me to pull up the blog and show off my creations.  So for that, the pictures on the site are great!    There were long periods of no posts but I was ok with it…it was there in the background waiting for me when I needed and wanted it.


Enter website number three.


  In mid 2018 I decided to take one of my old photography  blogs and turn it into…..something.  Yeah, something. What is the question.  I had grand plans for recipes at one point.  I had grand plans for travel at another point.  I also thought about doing reviews.  Yes, I was all over the place.  I would post for a bit then back off and not post anything until the next fabulous idea would hit me!  Then I would post all fast and furious for a while.  It was a vicious cycle.  Post, not post, guilt, brilliant idea, post, post, not post. This blog has been on my mind for the last 2 years. But then something else would come and edge it a bit further out of my thoughts.


In 2019 I started  Youtube channel.  Yes, a Youtube channel.  If I thought that maintaining a blog was a fair amount of time, a youtube channel is 100% more costly in time.  Yet I enjoy!it…and my rate of uploading videos grew from once a week to two times a week and then a third time a week……followed by some random videos that I called bonus videos.   And then I decided to throw in a miniature video each week…in addition to  the 3-4 videos I was already creating.  I was doing this on top of my full time job….a job that has a 1.5 hour commute…EACH WAY.  My work days are between 11 and 12 hours each day…5 days a week. 


I remembered my word of the year and I decided to remain committed….to EVERYTHING. Time management was a big thing….but It was difficult.  Yet I loved doing everything!  I used my one planner to try to keep things straight.  And it does work.  But Seriously  look at my planning page.


It’s crazy…I have different things posting on different days.  I know my system and I can barely keep it straight! A typical week was beginning to look like this…… I was committed to over 10 posts/uploads a week. 


Am I insane????   Yes, I am!   And while I’m not stressed…YET.  I can feel a dissatisfaction from the pressure starting to grow a bit.  SOOOO  I am stepping back a bit!   It is time to reevaluate and adjust.

 

The biggest change is that while this website will still be heavy in weight loss it is going to be more all-encompassing.  I have already added recipes, which isn’t a stretch, I’ve done this off and on over the  years and this after-all a weight loss website...so recipes fit in! But I will also  be adding random travel/exploration of our world posts.  I will be adding in some review posts. I will be writing what my heart desires.   I will be combining all of my ‘fabulous’ ideas into this one website to create my journal…my contribution to the world….something that makes me happy. .    I will still be posting on Monday, Wednesday and Friday.  As of right now I am still leaning toward Monday continuing to be my big weight loss report and weigh in reporting day.  (I weigh in officially on Friday, but it is so much easier to leisurely write my post versus rushing like mad to write it and post it all on Friday morning after my weigh in).   The other two days are up in the air.  You will still get recipes added to the collection.  But you may also get some other things.  It will depend on my mood at the moment.  And who knows…you may get extra bonus posts….I don’t have to be tied to that posting schedule!  (Such as my corona virus shame post last Tuesday) 


Beliefinliving will be closed down permanently VERY soon. (if not already by the time I post this).  I will be moving those posts over here at some point. You will probably see a slow integration of some of those older posts show up on this site.


I plan on keeping tasteoftiny.blogspot.com open.  I enjoy having my dollhouses in one spot.  But don’t be surprised if you do see some miniature posts on this site also sometime in the future. I really want to make a commitment to post weekly on tasteoftiny, but as much as it pains me to say it, I have to back off of the ‘I must post weekly or else’.  I am working more on my miniatures, so posts SHOULD come naturally the more I work.  We shall see.  Tasteoftiny is definitely something I can revisit at a future date. (and it is also hurting me because I would LOVE to take tasteoftiny to something bigger. But right now, it is going to remain a blogspot address and remain my little baby……)



As for Youtube.  I am not giving that up.  HOWEVER, I am planning on only keeping my Sunday, Wednesday Friday schedule set.  But I’m not sure if I will keep my themed days or just post what I want on those three days.  No pressure!


So my new schedule is really only 6 commitments a week.  Which is still a whole bunch.  But it is MILES better than what it was getting to be.  I believe actually deleting the beliefinliving will eliminate some of that stress and pressure to actually utilize a website that I am paying for (my website renewal for that website comes due in about 1-2 months). 


 So let me see how this adjustment goes.   Some of the changes will take a while to actually be noticeable…..but change is a coming!