Sunday, April 15, 2018

Up from the Ashes

What in the world to name this post.  Cobbled?  Hot Hobble? Chipmunks? Eiii Yiii Yii? Excuses?  Addiction Transference? Plans for fun? This morning as I was thinking about writing it, I thought of all of these and some more.    So many options...maybe while I actually write this post I'll come up with the perfect title.  Typically I don't title my posts to the end who knows what will be the winner!

I made a few vows that I would be running as soon as we moved.  Well, the first days were so brutal with the move that I didn't run..  Then  we struggled with exhaustion that first I didn't run.  But I swore that week two was going to be the week!   It was cold!   Then one night I was driving home and there were some rain drops on the windshield!!!  Yes!  There were!  Then I didn't want to take time from my precious time with Jason one night.    But on Friday morning I sat at my desk at work and made the vow....that night FOR SURE.  Furthermore, I would run both mornings of the weekend! 

Yes!  I came up with a plan.  If I ran both mornings of the weekend...then to get my third run in for the week I would just need to run 1 time through the week.  Not perfect, but it could work!  I would make it work!    With my plan in place, I grinned when the clock showed that it was time for lunch.  The weather was FABULOUS and i was going to walk around the lake!  I grabbed my phone and my 'portable lunch'  (apple, oranges and some pretzels) and headed out.

Hot Hobble
Now let me say..the weather was amazing so I decided to wear a skirt...and i was so amazing that I grabbed sandals to wear to work.  Halfway around the lake and I knew that I had made a colossal mistake!  Hot spots on the balls of my feet AND on the sides of my feet.  What do you do at that point?  I was halfway around the lake???  Either way I went I had to walk.   I crossed my fingers.  I did some praying and I hobbled back to work.  My feet were so sore!  I knew that running was going to be sketchy!  After All, even barefoot I could barely walk!  No running for me on Friday night.

Saturday morning dawned and my right foot was pretty much better but the left one was still kicking.  No running for me on Saturday either. 

Plans for Fun

Saturday was not lost though.  We did our grocery shopping and then headed out on our bikes.  WOO HOO!  It was a much easier ride than last week!   It still 'hurt' a bit but the ride was quite pleasant.  As always, we talked quite a bit while we rode.  We talked about running in the evening versus morning. (he prefers me to ride in the evening as it is light versus the morning when it is still dark).  We talked about starting to walk a bit in the evenings also.  We also talked about a new bike purchase for me!  Now that sounds fun doesn't it????


Sunday morning came and I laid in bed.  I knew I had to start this running thing.. I dreaded it, but I knew that I needed to start it!   It was happening.  And then I thought about the fact that since my last time I ran, I switched phones!   I have NO music loaded onto my phone.  Cobble number one:  So I grabbed some free music player with free music for a quick fix.  Crisis averted.    Oh no!  I don't have mapmyfitness on my bike either  Cobble/fix number two:  A quick download and log in an I was set with that too.   I got dressed and grabbed my gear and stood at the door ready to go.  I slipped my headphones onto my head.   NOTHING!  Well duh!  Why would they be working after 9 plus months of sitting in the box?  Of course they would need recharged!!!  Cobble number three:  Luckily I had the earbuds that came with my new phone still in a box and even amidst a recent move, I knew where the box was!  I hate earbuds!  I had wired headphones.  But I used them!

Eiii Yiii Yii

Our apartment complex is on a road that is a is a 1.21 mile loop.  And it was a brutal loop!  Surprisingly it was my feet that hurts....they just ached!  And yes, I count that 1.21 miles as a victory!


So I said earlier that I cobbled together some music options for my run this morning.  I just grabbed some free music.  Well some were apparently 'covers'.  So while I did get to listen to twisted sister in all their 80's glory....I was forced to listen to P!nk's "Fun House"  done by what sounded like the chipmunks.  It was......interesting to say the least.


I did it though!  I ran!   I may even get a bike ride in today also!

Addiction Transference

I know that I have a food addiction.  I've known it for quite some time.   I know that I was beating that addiction back when I was losing all that weight.  And I know that in recent months and years that the addiction has been beating me.  I have been talking a lot in recent years about how I do not want to live like a 'Nazi' with no sweat treats....with no pizza...and no other foods that I love.  I want to find that healthy happy medium.   This morning it occurred to me that when I was 'winning' at the weight loss , I really wasn't really winning, I had just transferred that addiction.  My new addiction at that time?  I was totally addicted to that caloric budget.  I felt 'high' and on top of the world when I was winning that war.    I was addicted to the weight loss regime.  And when I lost the battle and that weight loss regime wasn't 'doing it' for me, I went right back to the original addiction of food.  Hand in hand but still addictions.  Some people get addicted to exercise (our neighbor runs ALL the least so it seems,) some people take pills, others drink alcohol,etc)   I am addicted to food...and apparently I can transfer that addiction to the 'diet regime'.  But I don't want either addiction....I want the happy medium. 

And yes, that might mean that I ride a bike like a mad woman for 3 hours so I can enjoy that delicious pizza....or cake...or whatever.  But it's a FUN ride that I would be doing anyway....and it's food that I enjoy.  It's balance and moderation...not riding 6 hours and then eating a dry piece of lettuce.  Not eating a dry piece of lettuce and then moaning about the outrageous calories I just ate.   Balance!

So how to sum up this post with a singular title?  Wow....Chipmunks still makes me laugh, but that is just one teeny tiny aspect of this post.  Hmmmm.....I think I have it.  Up from the ashes!  As low as I was this week in a previous post....I have pulled myself together and I am rising like a phoenix from the ashes!