Tuesday, July 20, 2010


Addictive. I can easily become addicted to something and anything. Food is my main addiction. Food gives me a high, it feeds and nurtures every emotion. I am a food addict. But I can also see how my personality lends itself to addictions. I easily become addicted to those stupid games on face book. Farm town, Farm ville, and most recently frontier ville. Frontier ville has been the worst though as it involves challenges. But I want to be the highest player amongst my friends. It's nothing I've ever vocalized, but there it is...I'm competing for the top slot. And in that, I become addicted to the high of leveling up and moving closer to my goal. I become solely focused on something and it monopolizes my life.....I have that tendency.

Is this a bad thing? Sometimes, yeah. I can't sit on my computer staring at my face book games all day. I can't wake up and go directly to the computer. I have responsibilities and I have to have a life. Those games are not life...they are simply one facet of relaxation. Food addiction...yeah, bad. But is it bad to be so focused on something that is a good thing for you? When I was losing weight the first time around...I was incredibly successful. I lost well over 100 pounds. I was doing great...but I was totally focused....anal about it really. I was addicted to the 'hunt'. Losing a pound was my new high. Conquering the food choices at a restaurant was another high. I was single-mindedly focused on losing weight. I don't think that my husband suffered from my single minded focus. (in fact he lost weight too). But I still spent time with him...I still cooked his meals (healthy ones). It was all good. But in my free time, my quiet time, my time....I was single minded in my pursuit. So that's my question. Is it healthy? Is it healthy to turn my food addiction into a single minded quest for losing weight.

I will say that my husband did used to talk about how he was afraid that I wouldn't know how to stop when I did reach goal. That I would continue on toward some un-attainable goal weight. But I set his mind at ease when I did reach 180 and the doctor approved of that weight and I was happy with myself at that weight.

Soooooo my question is addictions.....transference of addictions.....is it ok if it's something healthy? Hmmmmm

Soooo day one of my challenge...and quite honestly with me getting my butt off the proverbial fence that I've talked about for quite some time.....it ended. I did ok. I did nibble on a small handful of mini marshmallows toward the evening. But otherwise, I did really good. I also restarted taking my multi-vitamins. I used to take them religiously...but then just sorta fell away. So i started that too. I also got my water consumption in......I felt like I was going to float because I hadn't been used to drinking all that water on a daily basis...but I'm workin' it!!!!

Today....food is on track thus far. Zumba is tonight...so life is good. :-)