16 Minutes

Today I just want to whine a bit........

 Job hunting is for the birds.  Let me tell you!  This is not anything I would recommend for the faint at heart!  I've put in so many applications and I'm not even getting calls.    It's enough to seriously depress someone!

Most recently I  applied for to a company that literally is the counterpart to the job that I have been doing for the last however many years.   In a normal situation, I would be a shoe in for the job.  I met every qualification.  I had experience!   I filled everything out  and hit the submit button.  I was actually a bit hopeful!   For 16 minutes.    And then my hope was smashed to smithereens.  You see,  it took them  only 16 minutes to send me a reject letter!

Seriously, this is terrible.  I would feel utterly despondent except that I know that my ex-cowokers (with the exception of two that got jobs literally before we had even worked out last day at our job) are having the same issue.  So I know it's not me!  But dang if it doesn't feel horrible.

Meanwhile, my arthritis is crankin'!   Yikes it aches!   But I'm pushing through and not letting it get to me!  It's only 11 AM and I already have my indoor exercise done, the outdoor exercise completed and our grocery shopping done and it's all put away.   Go me!   Now to commence with the job hunt! 

75 Hard: Week One

 This may be a record for me on recent challenges and attempts at a restart, but I actually made it through the first week of the 75 Hard Challenge!   I will take that as a win!   Seriously, how many times have I babbled on about a new plan and then failed to get past the first week!  So I'll take 1 week as a win!   You can read more about this on my recent post. 

The Challenge Rules

     1.  Follow a Diet Plan

    2. Exercise 2 times a day one of which HAS to be outside. The indoor workout HAS to be 45 minutes or more.  The outdoor one is preferably 45 minutes or more but I can be as short as 30 minutes.  (Altered from the original 75 hard which is two 45 minute sessions)

    3. Drink 64 ounces of water (altered from the original 75 hard which required 1 gallon of water)

    4. Read 10 pages of a non fiction book daily (I read digitally and have no pages....so I am aiming for 10 minutes a day)

    5.  Take a progress picture each day

But lets talk about the particulars of each day! 

Day 1of 75 Hard

I nailed this day. 100% slayed it!   For my indoor exercise I completed 45 minutes on the exercise bike.  I didn't ride like a bat out of hell, and my butt was so incredibly sore but I finished those 45 minutes like a champ!  My legs were a bit wobbly when it was done, but it was done with a smile.   It snowed all day and we ended up with about 6-8 inches.  It was still snowing toward evening, but I went outside and shoveled for my 45 minutes of exercise.  (Luckily we only got another half inch after I shoveled so I didn't have to redo much, just swept those areas.)  I felt like I was drowning but I managed to get my full gallon of water down my gullet and my calorie count was 1354!  For my reading, I started the book "The Diet Trap Solution: Train your Brain to Lose Weight and Keep it off for Good".  (Amazon Link)   It was a great start!

I started this on a whim and while I was determined, I was totally skeptical about the chances of my success due to my many failures!

Day 2 of 75 Hard

The snow had finally stopped and it was time to shovel ourselves out.  I manned the shovel, Jason used the snowblower. I went out two times and each time was just about an hour of shoveling (56 minutes and 51 minutes).  I am counting shoveling as my exercise.  I drank about 80 ounces of water, which is a win,  I continued reading the same non fiction book and I had 1446 calories.   For some reason I was just hungry. (Or maybe I imagined myself hungry, whichever the case may be.)  But even at the 1446, I was still under my goal of 1500!  So a win!

Day 3 of 75 Hard

This day took planning and thought.   I went into my mom's to work on painting the house with my brother.    I  didn't know what lunch would bring, so I tried to keep my breakfast lighter and spent some time looking at my dinner plans to see how much I could shave off of my dinner to create more calories if needed.  Therefore, when I did go out to eat for lunch with my brother, sister in law and two of their kids, I knew exactly how many calories I had available for lunch AND how many calories I could squeeze out of dinner.  (It was Taco Tuesday at our house and I swapped my meal from Tacos to a taco salad  which used less meat but more salad stuff.   Calories saved.  I also crunched up 2 taco shells instead of 3.  Calories saved.   And I also only ate 1/2 cup of the rice dish instead of 1 cup!)   I also intently looked at the menu when we arrived at the restaurant (thank heavens they had the calories listed on the board, it made it easier than pulling out my phone) and I chose wisely.  And honestly, was probably happier with my options than had I gotten the traditional burger and fries!  I ended the day with 1493 calories.  I did not finagle the numbers any more than making the above adjustments.   After I got home I went in and made the adjustments that I had planned and it came to 1493.   Squeezed that one out by the skin of my teeth!  I did drink a diet coke whilst out at lunch, but I pounded the water the rest of the day and got my required water done!

I also had to plan and think about my exercise and work to get it all done before I left the house at 9!   The planning of the exercise was the easy part.  It was the temps outside that made it yucky!  The outdoor temperatures took a nose dive and it was COLD.  I was dreading my 'outdoor' exercise!   I did it though.  I was out tramping around with the dog and my toes were frozen but I marked off 30 minutes outside!  I also got my indoor workout checked off by completing two different workouts back to back.  I did half with Body Groove and the other half with Zumba Sula.  I continued reading the same non fiction book and ended the day with a win!

Day 4 of 75 Hard

Day four was another day where I had to work on planning a bit more.  I had a lunch date with a friend and I wasn't sure where we would be going pretty much the last minute.  But knowing that, I did two things.  I had a simple banana for breakfast and for dinner I planned to make a meal that I do not eat but that Jason loves!  I knew that I could fill up on veggies and whatnot if I didn't have the calories for more. And if I did have the calories, I could make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich (the ultimate sandwich) or a grilled cheese (second ultimate).    I also wanted to get my exercise completed early because my friend and I hadn't seen each other in ages and we expected to spend a few hours together catching up.    Therefore, by the time I headed out to meet her for lunch I had already completed 30 cold minutes outside with the dog and  45 minutes of cardio with the youtube channel, CDornerFitness.  I had taken my daily picture and read my 10 minutes of non-fiction.  The only thing I had left to worry about was drinking my water and eating within my calories. 

I ordered water with my lunch which helped me not get sidetracked from the water goal.  I  had them refill it three times.....so that on top of what I drank on the way to and from lunch and what I drank at home made getting my water to be a cinch!   The food.   I ordered a breakfast meal (we were at a diner) and carefully calculated and managed my calories the rest of the day. I ended the day at 1338 calories.   YAY!  Four days of success, can I really manage to do this?  It was at this point that I started to actually believe that I could do this!

Day 5 of 75 Hard

This was a day of just blah.  I was tired so I didn't do my indoor exercise at 5AM while Jason was in the shower.  I did get my 10 minutes of reading in during that time.  However, no exercise.  I told myself, that I had no plans the rest of the day so I had 'plenty' of time to get it done.   I settled in for the day and it would have been bad, but Zoey wanted to go out and play.  So I bundled up and out we went for our 30 minutes!  It was still earlier in the day so it was still cold!  (Although the temps are rising!)  Time kept passing the dog was sleeping so soundly and well, indoor exercise........................

Indoor exercise was done literally minutes before Jason got home from work at 6PM!    But I did it!  

I planned my food for the day and worked out my calories and I eat exactly what I had planned which equaled out to be 1354 calories.   Water was tough.  I was feeling super lazy all day.  So when I settled into the recliner and realized that I had forgotten my water in the kitchen I didn't feel like getting up......and I didn't get up for a few hours.  So I found myself at 1PM with having only drank 16 ounces.  But not to worry I may have been guzzling water at the last minute, but I finished it!  (I finished literally at the last minute, as in I was standing in the kitchen guzzling the rest and then went straight to bed!)

Day 6 of 75 Hard

One would think that I would learn my lesson with the water!   And I did, somewhat!  I remembered to take my water with me to where I was working.  I spent the morning on the computer doing some stuff that is required of my by the unemployment office, looking for jobs and whatnot.  It comes around to about 12:30 and I realized I had not taken a single sip of the water that I took with me.  That means that I only had drank the 16 ounces of water that I drank with my breakfast.....the one that I put my Trace Minerals into. (Amazon link here....seriously, this stuff is amazing!)

 I also learned the lesson and I got my indoor workout completed at 5AM.  I did my outdoor workout at about 8AM (with the dog of course) and I was doing great!   

There is nothing too exciting about the day.  I checked everything off the 75 hard list and rolled through my day like a champ.  I ended the day with 1379 calories.  So I was happy with that!

Day 7 of 75 Hard

It was Saturday, but Jason had to work so it felt like a week day.  That means that we were up at 5AM and I didn't let the fact that it was a Saturday derail me.  I got that 45 minutes of my first workout completed early!  By 6AM I was on the couch reading.  I read for a while on my non fiction book that I chose to start my 75 hard challenge.    I read that until Jason was leaving for work.   I got outside and got the dog walk and some time outside with me walking and moving to knock off another cold workout. (Dang it has warmed up but I was still cold!)

This day I actually sipped at my water all morning and therefore didn't hit the afternoon with very little water consumption under my belt!  I had a plan to get my water done early so that I could enjoy some diet soda in the evening, because I've been so behind the last few days that I haven't been able to enjoy that treat and I wanted it tonight!  I finished my water right before dinner so I was able to pour myself a glass of diet soda!  Woo hoo!  (And yes, I realize how lame it is to reward myself with a glass of diet soda, but them's the breaks!)

I kept my calories in check for the day and I feel like I had a fantastic day food wise!   My calorie count was 1297 so I was spot on where I wanted to be!  Go me!

Reflections on Week One of the 75 Hard

I was hopeful, but still skeptical at the beginning of the week.  But as the week progressed I started to feel a bit more confident that maybe, just maybe I could do it.  I started to think that maybe I could make it to day 75 and complete this!  In fact,   I actually feel a bit disgusted with myself for making the adjustments that I made.  I feel, well....  I feel guilty!  I feel guilty for lowering my goal from 1 gallon of water to the 64 ounces.  I also feel totally guilty about lowering that second workout to 30 minutes.  I feel like I am cheating!   However, I know that had I not made the changes, I probably would have missed the water by day three if not day two.   Furthermore, there is no way I would have made the 45 minutes outside in that un-heavenly cold!  So while I feel guilty, I know that I made the right decision in my alterations.  

I have been sleeping SO much more soundly. I have had next to no instances where I wake up at 2 in the morning wide awake and unable to get back to sleep.  I won't lie, I have woken up here and there but I'm right back to soundly sleeping in minutes if not seconds.   There was one day where I woke up and I honestly thought that I was going to be awake the rest of the night.  However, the next thing I knew the alarm was going off and I was waking up!   The issue?   Jason says that I have been snoring a lot more than normal this week.  He has tried to tell me that the dog kept coming to the bed to check on me and that the dog finally gave up and left the bedroom!  I have also been roused from sleep a few times while he is bumping me or whacking the bed to try to 'reset' me.   Is the snoring related to the 75 Hard?  Who knows!   We were talking about it this morning and I laughed and said this is the best I've slept in YEARS.  Maybe I'm just so sleep deprived from years of issues that I'm sleeping so deep that I'm snoring.   OK, I know that is not it!  But that is what I told him! 

I found myself wanting to dance a little, wiggle my butt a little and just move a bit more after my exercise.  Not every day, there were one or two days where I was just tired.  But most days it kinda rejuvenated me!  It kind of gave me a pep in my step!

So there you go....week one in the books.   Week two?   Ready.......Set....Go!

Revealing a Secret

 I have been keeping a secret!  I was going to say it's not a huge one...but you know, it has the potential to be huge!  Now I have to be honest, I've only been keeping this secret for a week!....or actually 5 days at this point.  Obviously I can't keep secrets, but it is what it is. 

I have hesitated about sharing this secret.  How many times have I come on here and had some grandiose plan or a wonderful challenge that I was gung-ho to start?   I don't have a number of how many times, and quite frankly I don't think I want to even KNOW the number.  Why?  Because if the number were ten  then I can pretty much guarantee that there would be at LEAST 9 corresponding failures. My success rate on these seemingly awesome plans is pretty much non existent!  (Just for the record, the number of grand ideas is MUCH higher than 10.)   So for me to come on and share my secret and spout off yet one more challenge that I am embarking upon is insanity at it's best.  Yet, here I am ready to embark upon another round with a new somewhat ludicrous idea for myself.

Years ago I had started to hear about the 75 Hard.  This is a challenge that lasts for 75 days (surprising right?) and involves some very specific actions that need to take place every day.  It's only five things, nothing to worry about right?   Hold onto your hat, until you see what the five things are!

    1.  Follow a Diet Plan

    2. Exercise 2 times a day (45 minutes each)...one of which HAS to be outside.

    3. Drink a gallon of water

    4. Read 10 pages of a non fiction book daily

    5.  Take a progress picture each day

The rules are that if you miss a day, you go back to day 1 and start over.  Yeah, a bit all or nothing!  There is no room to fail in this challenge!

Easy right?    Maybe for some, but for me this sounds huge!  I've actually written about it before (you can read it here) but even then,  I shied away from the 75 hard challenge.  Instead I tried a Project 50 Challenge.  The project 50 had similar rules but the guidelines were a bit more relaxed.   So I tried the project 50 Challenge.   And of course, I failed.  Seriously, I don't even think I made it two weeks!  

So this past Sunday morning when I was messing around my computer and stumbled upon someones post about their successful 75 Hard journey I started watching.   Inspired, I decided right then and there to start the 75 Hard challenge.   No, I didn't wait until the next day or the next week.  I immediately hopped onto my IPad and downloaded a non fiction book from the library and within minutes I was in the office and riding the exercise bike!  Talk about starting something on a whim?

Oh yeah, and I started a plan that requires outdoor exercise for 45 minutes a day in the middle of a snow storm and at the beginning of a week where the temps were forecasted to be in the single digits.  I can't help but think of the parallel to my running adventures of 2013 when I started to run with the couch to 5K program in January and ran through some really cold days in those first few weeks!  (You can read about that time here.)   That was one of my rare successes...I completed the Couchto5K program and actually ran regularly for a few years.   Maybe suffering through hellish torture in the cold is what spurred me  to continue on when I wanted to quit, since I was able to  say to myself, "nothing is as bad as running on those really cold days".   Hmmm...maybe my VERY COLD beginning to the 75 hard will be a good thing!

I completed the first day of 75 hard 100% as the challenge is written...water, exercise, reading, picture and food! Check check check check and check.  But after the dust settled on my impulse decision I was able to realize that I DID want to institute a few minor changes in my plan.  SOOOO the 75 hard-ish that I am following is thus:

    1.  Follow a Diet Plan  -  I did not change this, but only cemented the 'rules of engagement' in my head.   My rules are that I need to keep my calories under 1,500 a day.  Since I do not historically lose at 1,500 calories, I will NOT be eating the calories that I "earn" via exercise.  With one exception.  I will allow myself to eat my earned calories one day each week.  That goes along with the plans and ideas that I have adopted throughout the last few years.  And that is that 100% restriction does NOT work!

    2. Exercise 2 times a day (45 minutes each)...one of which HAS to be outside.  Here is where one of the two major changes in the plan takes place.  The indoor 45 minute exercise is remaining as that.  However, the outdoor segment of exercise only has to be more than 30 minutes.   Seriously, it's dang cold out there. I heard them say on the news to not leave your dog out for more than 20-30 minutes.   So I am giving myself the grace to stop at 30 minutes.   There was one day that even my Newfoundland....the quintessential winter dog was done and ready to go inside at the 30 minute mark!

    3. Drink a gallon of water.   I actually made it to one gallon on day one.  But I am also giving myself grace on this one.  However, I NEED to be over 64 ounces of water each day!  My hope is that throughout the 75 days that I can build up to the gallon.   But honestly, going from near nothing to a gallon is a HUGE jump!  So 64 ounces it is!

    4. Read 10 pages of a non fiction book daily.  Yeah, no problem!

    5.  Take a progress picture each day.   Easy, but just have to remember!

I am worried about one thing.....and that is when/if I get a job within this 75 Hard challenge.  Learning a new job will be exhausting enough...but to do so on top of trying to complete this challenge.  That might be hairy!   And part of me says "well if/when I get a job all bets are off".  But you know what, that is not HARD...and this challenges name is 75 HARD.  So Win...Lose...Draw, I'm going to attempt it!

So I am on day 5.    Stay tuned for an update on how my week one went!  

Back to the Grind

 It is always a tragic event to go back to work after a vacation.   I don't believe that I have ever said, "I'm ready for vacation to be over and to get back to work!"   No, I may say "I'm ready to be at home again and back to a more normal routine," But not back to work.  Yet back to work I went this past week!

First week Post Vacation

Luckily this week was mostly mundane.   I would rather have been still on vacation, but that isn't the way life is for me.  I must work to pay for the pets!  (Ok, and my mortgage, gas for the cars, food on the table.  You know those little things in life).    

Work was pretty basic.  I got to put together a video 'all about me' for work.   I actually will probably upload it to my YouTube channel, because it just makes me smile!  I will link it here when I do.   But other than that, basic and nothing too stressful.

Outside the weather was crazy.  The last day of vacation it was in the 80's and stinkin' hot.  The next day it was cold!   We even skirted with some frost!  SO with that said, I stripped all the tomatoes from the plants.  I breaded them and froze them for us to have fried green tomatoes this winter.  Jason loves fried green tomatoes.  We also dug up our sweet potatoes.  We had never grown sweet potatoes and we were not sure what we would get from them.   Well we had 4 plants....in 15 gallon grow bags in our backyard (the deer annihilated the 4 plants that we had down in the garden).  We got about 35 pounds of sweet potatoes.  So the problem?   One sweet potato is actually over 7 pounds by itself.  We will be eating sweet potatoes for days with that sucker!  Luckily, I do like sweet potato so will feast on those leftover for my lunches!  We did a few other things in that garden and picked a bit more produce.   Closing down the garden for the year!

I do think the animals were happy to get back to a routine.   Mertz hangs out in my office most of the day and she always spends a fair amount of time on my desk while I work.  She missed out on that one-on-one time with me while I was on vacation. (There is a gate at my office door and the office is off limits to Zoey!)   Zoey also seemed to enjoy being back to 'normal'.   During our vacation we were always here, or in and out and taking he with us places.  Which is fine and good except that she typically sleeps all day long! (and all night too)   Just a normal weekend and she is whipped by Monday and so lethargic and tired on Mondays until she can rest up.  So the 11 days of vacation 'pert near' killed her!  hahaha  So she slept the first few days away!  But no fear, she always woke up in time to wait for her daddy!  Yes, she demands to go outside at least a half hour before Jason gets home and she just sits there and stares!

Weight Loss after Vacation

I returned back to work riding high on the knowledge that I had managed to maintain my weight over an 11-day vacation!   I knew how huge that victory was!  Seriously, previous years have showed much different results!   There was the vacation shortly after I reached Lifetime status with weight watchers, I gained 10 pounds in that week!  Three years ago, when we got married while on vacation, I gained 5 pounds....and we hiked every day!  I could reference vacation after vacation and almost without fail, I gained weight!   But not this time!   So yes, I was proud.  Yes, I was motivated!

I started my Monday riding high.  I started with exercise at 5AM!  I got my water ready, and I guzzled it all day.   I eat my salad for lunch, my banana for breakfast.  I was doing it! I stepped onto the scales on Tuesday morning.  (I have always weighed daily and noom actually encourages daily weigh ins).    My weight was up!  TWO FREAKIN' POUNDS up!   What the what?    I was disgusted.  I was discouraged.  I was angry!  But I didn't let it derail me....

I kept doing what was right.

I wish I could say that I exercised all 5 workdays, but that didn't happen!    But I got a few days of exercise done!   Something is always better than nothing!

I wish I could say that I didn't cave and have that pretzel after work each evening. (Yes, I ate a hard pretzel every day......not huge ones...but definitely not the tiny ones).  I wish that I could say that I ate less bread/carbs.  But I can't say those things.   I also didn't track my food religiously this past week.  But you know what, it's good.  I ate more intuitively and guess what?   The scales righted themselves and I am back to being at a maintain!  So that is a good thing!

I am happy with that for sure!

However, I don't want a simple maintain!  I want to lose!  I want my legs to not ache.  I want to not feel my body is going to break in half when I stand up.... or sit down.  I don't want to take the steps one step at a time like an old lady.  I want to lose...I want to regain my fitness level.  I want to thrive in this thing called life...and right now I am not thriving.  I am existing.  

So, while I'm feeling ok about my last week, I have lots of room for improvement.   I don't have big plans for this upcoming week.  I am simply planning on focusing on the basic things.  Exercise. Water. Healthy eating (which is a combination of number of calories and quality of said calories.)  Simple and easy.     Simple and basic, that's the plan!

It's 4 AM you Ninny!

I was in the middle of writing a long post about the urge to give up, updates on life, beekeeping and all things my life, health and happiness yesterday  and I stepped away from the computer and poof, it was gone!    ~~deep sigh~~   So here I am again!  This time on the computer (I was writing it previously on my phone).   This post is not getting away from me!

I'm Not Giving up
The last two weeks have been a real struggle.  I have been so frustrated with my weight loss efforts.  Ok, not really with my efforts.  I'm frustrated with the numbers on the scale, how I feel and how my clothes fit.I have been for the last few weeks eating about 1500 calories.  I've been exercising.  I've been doing it!  Yet I'm not losing and in fact I may even have gained a pound or two.   Talk about frustrating!  So I reevaluated where I am and what I'm doing.   I looked back to what I have been doing in the past when I have been successful.   I came up with two things.  Cut calories and lower my intake of carbs.

I talked in my last post about the carbs already.  I know that I can have 1 serving of bread/pasta/potatoes a day.  I've known this for a while.  Yet it seems so innocent to just have a small sandwich at lunch.   Seriously, it's just a sandwich. However, that is true, except that I don't cut my complex carb from dinner.  I'm within my calories so no harm done right?   However, that is not right.  For me this doesn't work.  So back to limiting.   I'm ok with limiting, it allows me to have my much loved carbs but still lose.  (Oh heavens, I hope that this rule never changes!)  I have been working to enact this change.

The second thing that I am working to change is my calorie count.   I have been eating about 1500 calories.   I have LONG known that this doesn't work for me, yet I keep bumping my calories to that 1500 level.   1200 calories is where I need to be.   Yes, I know that seems low, but this has been tested time and time again in my life.  I first discovered it while I was losing with weight watchers.   Every time I tried to eat all of my weekly points, I would maintain or even gain.   Likewise, if I tried to eat my 'earned points' (earned through exercise) I would gain.   I had to keep my calories at the lower level.   I've encountered this numerous more times over the years.   In terms of calories 1200-1300 calories is my magic.   That's not a lot of calories!   So naturally more calories creep in...and if it's just a random day of 1500 calories I'm ok.  But when one day turns into 2 or 3 or weeks worth, then I don't lose!   So I'm getting strict again about keeping it at 1200!  

It's working!  Not fast, but I'm seeing the trend on the scales going down.

Exercise

Exercise has been really rough this week.   The alarm goes off at 5AM and I have only been able to muster up the gumption to exercise 2 times out of the last 5 days.  I've been just so tired, so sluggish and so unmotivated.  It wasn't until about midway through the week that it hit me.  The time change!   My body has been screaming at me.  It's been saying "It's 4AM you ninny!"  It doesn't seem like a huge difference but 4AM is sooo much worse than 5AM (and 5 AM isn't fun either!)

Beekeeping Class

I went to my second night of beekeeping class.  It is quite enjoyable.  Ok, I love learning new things, so I didn't expect it to be anything else.  However, I almost let my fear of trying something new keep me from it, but the fear was more "where to go, how to find it," etc and not fear about learning something new.  I'm glad I didn't let my fear win.  

Are we ready to pull the trigger on purchasing the set up and the bees?   Yeah, I think I am.  Sure, I"m scared senseless about the prospect but I'm ready.  What may hold me up is finances and time.  It will be a bit of outlay of expenses this year, and not sure we can swing it!   Secondly, there is time.  Ok, not really time, but the timing of all of this.   Shipments of bees are happening literally in 2 weeks.  Some places are already 'out' of bees to purchase.   So being ready at the right time may not happen.   But we will be ready for next year it not.

Weekend

We have a busy weekend planned.  We HAVE to get those bare root trees and plants into the ground.  We don't want them to move out of their dormant state!  This is a grocery week. It is also a week to clean the bird cage.  There are also a few other things that may or may not be happening!

Recipe Project

I have been working diligently on my mothers recipes.   This has been a much bigger project than I first thought when I took on the project.  So what is the project?   Gathering all of my mothers recipes, digitizing them and compiling them together.  Sounds easy and quick right?  NO, it has been huge!  Some  recipes that are near impossible to read. 

But that wasn't what made it a huge task.   What made it difficult was the fact that mom never settled on any one organization system for her recipes.  She had grand ideas though.  My oldest nephew and I have worked on cookbooks, baking magazines and recipes a few times together and we have laughed so hard because we have come across no less than 5 different organizational ideas for recipes.  Mom tried each one, but never really managed to finish any of them.   The problem with these multiple organization systems and the lack of any set system is that each time she started a new system she copied her tried and true and most used recipes into the new system.  So we are talking multiple versions of some of these recipes.   The lack of system also caused multiples as she had the same recipe written on a card and tucked in multiple books, magazines and drawers.   

Still not convinced this project was huge.   Right now, I am at 450 plus UNIQUE recipes.   That doesn't include the duplicates! 

It has been interesting to see the evolution of mom's baking through the years.  I found recipes from when we were kids.  Very basic and simple recipes.   I found fancier recipes that she used when she was a personal chef for some local priests.  Just this past week I found the recipes from the restaurant.  Yes, my grandmother owned a restaurant for years and my mom cooked there. (I also worked there doing short order, waitress and whatever else was needed).  The restaurant recipes were in my grandmothers handwriting!   The last evolution of my mom's baking was when she baked and sold her baked goods at a stall at various farmers markets.  How interesting to see my mom's life in recipes!

 So what am I going to do with these recipes?  First and foremost, it is for family.  For our use, for our memories.  I have toyed with a book...but where to begin with 450 plus recipes!

 

I remain  busy and active and taking steps to make my life, my health, myself the best version of me!

 

 

Slow Down Already

​This  past week has been insane!   It’s been crazy at work.  Life has been nuts (as always) and…well I’m just plodding on one day at a time!

Work is nuts.  I work in the pharmaceutical field and with patient assistance programs.  The new year means reenrollment season.   Cray-zee!  There have been days where I’ve actually made the remark, ‘I didn’t even have time to get a drink of water’.   I know that eventually things will peak and it will right itself, but right now we are still getting busier and busier.

Yesterday was supposed to be my endoscopy..to see if there is any damage from the unchecked acid reflux.  I got a call on Monday or Tuesday from the doctor’s office.  My insurance decided to deny the prior authorization because I haven’t tried the meds for 8 weeks and subsequently fail them.  I laughed because I’ve been on the meds for over three months and haven’t experienced any difference from my symptoms.  The doctor’s office said they were going to do an appeal/peer to peer review.  On Thursday they let me know that my insurance denied that also as the test not being medically necessary.   So my test on Friday was cancelled. I imagine that the doctor will try again later this year?  I guess.   

My colonoscopy is still on for next Friday.  That is the one I’m dreading.  Not for the procedure, I’m dreading the prep!     And I have a barium swallow at the end of the month that I’m assuming will be a go with my insurance.

It makes me angry though.  I am paying through the nose for the insurance.  I have the top tier/best insurance my company has to offer.   Grrr. Oh well.  It wasn’t meant to be at this time.

I’ve been doing really good with my 2024 miles in 2024.  Today may be the first day I don’t get my necessary miles for the day.  But I will be short by less than a half mile.  I have been over every other day this far…so I’ve been banking miles….not a lot, but I’ve been banking a little extra every other day.   I know that I’m probably not going to get my miles in on my colonoscopy day…so I need those extra miles!  

My weight has been fluctuating within a four pound range.  Literally one day I’ll be at the top end of the range and the next at the bottom only to be back up the next day.  I want to see the numbers dropping, and they aren’t.  So that means I have to make a few adjustments to my eating.   I have to find the magic formula for my body to lose at this time in my life. So adjust I will!

Meanwhile, Zoe had a rough morning this week!  I found her like this.  She wasn’t fighting.  She wasn’t moving a muscle.  I moved from side to side and she would slowly turn her head…in the box to track my voice!   I have a video on my YouTube channel and it makes me laugh  every time I see it!!

Achy But Not Giving Up

  
A few weeks back I stepped up the intensity in my workouts!  I was feeling it!  I was sore for sure, but I was loving it!    I was doing great!   And then it happened!  My leg started to ache!  My foot started to ache!  I was utterly miserable!  Yet, I continued pushing forward with my exercises.  I was on a roll, and nothing was going to stop me!  Famous last words that I should probably never utter again because every time I say that something happens to throw me off track!   (Here is an example from many years back). 

I wasn't going to let my streak of exercising and being on track with my health goals derail me.  So I continued onward, ignoring the pain.   But the pain kept getting worse.  The pain was mostly at the back of my knee.  But weirdly, the pain would radiate down through my calf and sometimes up through my thigh.  My Tarsal tunnel nerve started to bother me. (Yes, I've had problems with that in the past also).  Literally my left side from my thigh down just hurt!   I had Jason look at my leg and his concern was immediate.  He could see some swelling and a knot in the area where I was saying I was hurting the most.  Lovely!

I agreed that if it didn't clear up within a few days that I would go to the doctor/Urgent care!.   I was really crossing my fingers because I do not like to go to the doctor!   I also stubbornly didn't want to stop exercising.  I am in a routine with exercise.  I don't want to do it, but it is part of my morning routine, and I am doing well.  I knew that if I stopped, I would struggle to pick back up that routine!   I also am part of a step challenge that is taking place in the month of March. If I gave up my exercise, I would most decidedly fail on that step challenge!  Last but not least I am also doing my Project 50!  I didn't want to call it quits so soon!  Not when I am filled with this much determination!   So with some trepidation I continued to work out!  I did NOT push myself.  I have been choosing easier workouts.  I am doing exercise videos that don't push me quite as hard.   BUT, I am still working out!  I may not be as sweaty as before, but I am still up and moving!  I am proud of me!

SO how has the leg been?  I can definitely feel it during the workouts.  But throughout the day it seems to be a lot better.  I was talking to Jason last night and my remark was that "my leg just feels so tired".  It wasn't achy last night....just tired.  Which is honestly a really odd feeling to have one side of your body so tired and the other side ready to run a marathon (ok, maybe not thaat good but you get the idea!)  Jason looked at my leg and said that the swelling/bump has diminished.  It isn't gone totally....but it is looking better!

So, I am set to continue my lighter exercise routine!  Someday I'll get back to the higher intensity...in the meantime, I am just super proud that I am not giving up and that I am continuing with the easier exercise DVD's and Youtube videos.  I am also walking the dog a LOT.  Zoey and I are out there at 5AM and are out there a bunch of times a day.  I try to walk the whole time and if she is in a sniffy mood and just poking along I walk in place beside her!  I even sometimes run a bit with her! (Which she LOVES!)  Here is a 5AM picture of me!  Way too early to be outside I know!

Stepping Up

​Where does time go?  I’m telling you!  I blink and the day is gone!  Life is gonna slow down at some point right?

I have been doing Zumba and some dance aerobic classes through some YouTube videos.  I’ve gotten some good workouts but seriously, I have upped the intensity of my workouts this week.  I did it inadvertently.  Late last week I was thinking about my trunk of fitness stuffZ. I dug in and found my old exercise workout dvds!  I also found a whole bunch of other stuff.  I will probably pull that out at a later date.  I was excited about my old friends, the dvds!

The first dvd I popped in was a step dvd by Cathe Freidrich.   I remembered that I really liked her style.  The way she leads is easy to follow.  Through her videos I never felt totally lost.s. Maybe one step behind on occasion but her calling of the steps is so spot on that it is rare to miss a step!     I was once again hooked on step aerobics!  Sadly enough, I got rid of all of my VHS exercise tapes…so I only have one of her videos!  Im kinda bummed out about that.  Eventually I will have to add more to my collection or just pay the monthly fee for her website.  I will most likely just buy the dvds as needed.   

I also did a straight aerobic dvd.  It wasn’t as high intensity, but it served its purpose…and it was so crazy to listen to the dvd after years of it being in storage. Im telling you…it was like visiting with old friends!

Needing something different I was trying to find a Cathe step class online (nope she doesn’t have much in the way of a complete workout posted on YouTube).  I somehow stumbled upon CDornerfitness on YouTube.  Here style of leading is spot on and she calls everything a step ahead just like Cathe so that she is easy to follow.  (At least the two workouts that I have done thus far!).   Best part about it?  She posts full workouts for free.  Like she has hundreds of workouts.  Lots of step…but lots of other styles of exercise classes also!  Yay!!   What a find!!!  https://youtube.com/@CDornerFitness

So Zumba…and these other videos I’ve done have been good.  But adding the step totally upped the intensity!  I am sweating harder from the exertion with the step aerobics.  I am more sore (muscle achy sore) after the workouts also!  Love it!  

First week is done

 So the first week of the year is in the books and it is time for a weigh in.  I was so excited to start this new year and to smash my goals and to lose a ton of weight!  I was going to exercise each day.  I was going to start my year off incredibly strong!  I wanted this year to be awesome from the get go!!!   But how did it really go??? 

The week in review

We had a good weekend over New Years.  We spent time with Jason's parents to celebrate Christmas.  I love my little decorations.  (the bearded one was a gift this year).  

We also took down our Christmas decorations.  I was sad to see them go....but getting the tree out of our small apartment makes it seem less cramped!!!

We drove about an hour away trying to find a avian sun lamp....in an unexpected ice storm.  Sadly they didn't have any!  Does no place carry these near us?  I finally ended up buying one on Amazon..but it's not...well we can use it.  but we want something nicer!!!

The rest of the week was a normal work week.  5 days of work and boy oh boy did they seem to go by so SLOOOOWLY!!!  

We are enjoying working with our bird.  Kiwi is still a bit nippy and afraid of us...but he really wants to be with us, so it's just a matter of time!

The Food I ate to lose weight this week

I had grand plans to give up the sweat treats totally during the first week of the year!  I was going to keep my calories totally in check.  I was going to rock it out!   The sweat treats?  I didn't do too badly.  I did indulge one night on the homemade candy that Jason's mom made for us.  I ate ONE night...the first night and a limited number of pieces.  I would like to say I stopped there, but there was an incident where I saw the container of chocolate and just opened it and had some at lunch.  Other than those two situations I did great!

So how was my food in general?  I would like to say that I tracked everything.  I tracked about 70% of the time. There were a few days where I struggled.  I also struggled with portion control!  That is a biggie for me.  There was also one day at lunch where I just kind of went nuts!  I felt horrible afterwards....mentally and physically!  Lessons learned!

Getting exercise each day

I did amazing, absolutely amazing on the exercise!  Every day!  Without fail!  I smashed this new year!  I couldn't have done any better.  Oh wait, my attitude could have been better!  There were days where I really struggled to get moving!  But that doesn't matter does it?  I'm going to say it doesn't matter....because I did it and that is what counts!!!

The number on the scales

I was nervous to step on the scales.  I didn't think it was going to be much....if anything.  I am happy though to announce that I lost 0.8 pounds.  It's a far cry from what I gained over Christmas and over the year of 2020...but it is a start!  Now I plan on building on this success and losing again this upcoming week!!!!

What I need to work on this week

I have identified a few places that I need to tighten the reins.  

1. The first is my water consumption.  I would estimate and say that I am getting between 30-50 ounces each day....which is NOT enough!

2.  Track EVERY DAY

3.  Continue the no sweats!!!  In all fairness, If there is a day where I have sweats I'm ok as long as it is ONE day.  This is not a journey of all restriction...it is a journey of building a sustainable life!

So there you have it, my week in review and my plans for this upcoming week!  I've got this!!!

Exploring abandoned Properties

A few weekends back we had a weekend of great weather.  I am talking sweatshirt and even long tee shirt weather.  60° in mid December!  It was fabulous! We couldn’t let that weather pass us by!  So what did we do???   We went back to an abandoned house that we explored a year earlier!  And we found a second abandoned house to explore!  Be sure to check out the videos at the end if abandoned properties interest and fascinate you!

The first house is the Winderborne Mansion.  It was built in the 1870’s as a summer home for a prominent lawyer in Washington DC.   The family had three kids, one of which died when all three contracted typhoid.  One of those children grew up to become a doctor and her child also died at Winderborne when she fell off the stairway bannister.  The house was sold to another family in 1929 and remains in the possession of that family.  The last resident died in 2004 and there have been attempts to sell the property...with the price dropping substantially over the years.  The house is in a very bad state of disrepair but is absolutely amazing! If only walls could talk...this house would have some amazing stories!    Enjoy the pictures!  

The second house we visited was what I believe to be the White Oak Springs Farm.  This house was built in 1850 and while the brick walls are in good shape, the roof has caved in and the inside of the house is just rotting away.   The outbuildings appear to be in good shape and are well secured against intruders.

We had a fabulous time exploring these abandoned locations and hope to find more abandoned properties to explore.  It is fun to see how people lived in years gone by!  It is fun to try to piece together the history and lives.   It is a look at a piece of history that unfortunately may not be with us for too long.

A fun weekend and lots of activity

 This past weekend we had a fabulous time out and about in nature!   We hiked on Saturday for about 3-4 hours and we explored an old military base for about 3 hours.  It was a good active weekend and I it was the perfect way to get in exercise!

Browns Farm Trail:  Catoctin Mountain National Park

We started on Saturday by driving up to the Catoctin Mountain National Park.  I had researched a trail that I wanted to visit and an overlook that I had never been to (that I remember).   I was gung ho!   As we wound up the mountain and into the park property, I began to get a sinking pit in the bottom of my stomach.  There were cars EVERYWHERE.  Every little pull off had cars stacked up every which way parked.  It was insanity. As we got closer to the park visitor center and the road that we would be turning off on the amount of cars increased.  It was wall to wall people!  We turned onto the road that would take us to the parking lot at the trail head that I had planned to hike.  There were Park Police out directing traffic!  What the……..   Luckly it was just to control the mad amount of people that were visiting the park.  And even more happily, I had no run in with the police during this visit like I did a previous visit!

We drove carefully and cautiously through the swarms of people.  I was hopeful that the parking lot where we were heading would be a little less crowded.  After all, it was a mile or two from the visitor center.  But no.  It was jam packed!  No thank you!  I like a little peace and quiet when I hike.  I don’t want to be shoulder to shoulder in a crowd!  We drove on.  The next parking lot was busy also!  We were starting to think that we would have to ditch our plans to hike at Catoctin.  But I started to notice that the further out we went, the less people.  You see, there aren’t as many fabulous overlooks further into the park and that deters a lot of people. Not us!   We went to one of the furthest parking lots and there was plenty of parking. We hit up some trails off of that parking lot and we had a fabulous time!     Now don’t get me wrong, there were still people.  But it was a manageable amount!  I would estimate that we only see people once every mile of our hike.  Ahhhhhhhhhhh nature at last!

We even had time to stop and explore an old grave yard after our hike!!!

Fort Ritchie

On Sunday we woke up and we just didn’t know what we were going to do.  What to do?  Where to go?  I don’t know what sparked me to remember Fort Ritchie, but it came to my mind.  I had always known about it and had always had some vague idea that this was a decommissioned army base and that there were a lot of empty buildings.  But I knew nothing about it other than that.  I mentioned it to Jason and he was all for it!

Boy were we surprised.  The county uses it as a park and there is a community center and a lake on the property.  The lake is man made and was created in the late 1800’s by an ice company to cut ice and sell in Baltimore and Washington DC.  In the 1920’s the property was developed into a training camp for the Maryland National Guard.  In the 1940’s, during the war the control of the property transferred to the U.S. Army where it became a military intelligence Training Center.    Fort Ritchie closed it’s doors in 1998 and the future of the property has been questionable.   In the meantime, it was a fabulous place to walk around and explore! 

We were able to see the outside of a lot of old buildings.  Many of the buildings were locked with the windows boarded over.  But some of the buildings had previously been broken into and were open.  We did not break anything but if it was open and available we entered.  It was neat to imagine what went on within the walls of these old buildings!

 

After Fort Ritchie, we made the 2 mile drive and checked out the overlook at the PenMar park and drove up to High Rock.  We did not stay at High Rock Long, it was insane the amount of people that were there.  We inspected the view from the top of the rock and then retreated.  There was no way to enjoy the serenity of the view when there were so many people jostling and yelling.   This site has the most awesome view, but it is also one that saddens me the most.  The graffiti covering these mammoth rocks is atrocious.  People have no respect for nature and it is sickening what they are doing.   I had read a while back that volunteers had worked to remove much of the graffiti.  You couldn’t tell! I tried to get a good picture but there were so many people......  So instead, enjoy the view from Pen Mar park!

We had a great time over the weekend.  We were out and about.  We were exploring.  We were moving and active. I couldn’t be more than happy with my activity over the weekend and of course the cool things we saw!

Planning and Plotting

I have been spending a lot of time thinking about where I am in this journey.  I have spent quite a bit of time pondering how I have been stuck.  I have been thinking a LOT about how I have been not losing weight and how I even gained 13-15 pounds since the Coronavirus reared it's ugly head in my life (late March).

A few things that I do know.  

1. I track my food...but I have allowed more snacks to creep into my food budget.  Those snacks account for the extra calories that throw me over my self set budget.   

2,  My sleep has been messed up for months and has gotten really bad in the last few months.  I sleep for maybe 4 hours and then I am awake...wide awake!   I am constantly in a state of tiredness.

3.  Exercise has been spotty at best.

So how am I going to fix this?  What is my plan?  How am I going to proceed?

Lets tackle the food issue.  I have a caloric budget.  I have been at this journey for many years.  I know that I SHOULD lose weight at 1500 -1700 calories.  But I also know that my body doesn't seem to agree with the theories and numbers.  I lose weight at 1200-1300 calories.  Yet, I continue to add snacks to my daily food intake....because it 'only puts me at 1500 calories...that's still in losing range!".   That has to stop.  My budget is 1300....that has to be a set in stone budget!   I will allow a cheat day/meal.  I think that is a healthy (mentally and physically) aspect of this journey.   But I am going to be serious....no extras.  When the budget is empty...so is my mouth!

Sleep.  I have been so messed up with my sleep lately.  It has been totally tiresome.  We think we may have solved that problem.  Jason has been plying me with Hemp/CBD pills...and unless it's a coincidence, I have been sleeping much better!  SO I am crossing my fingers and hoping and praying that the pills do the trick long term!

Exercise.  I have not been exercising.  I have that exercise bike and I have used it on my lunch breaks.  I was determined that September I was going to use it 3 days a week....if not more.  Yet the training that I was asked to lead really took my time and I ended up working through breaks and lunches.  I think I got 3 rides in.  That is coming to an end.  My health is very important and I need to act as such.  So the bike is a great option for me!   Furthermore, I have been itching to get out and run again.  My plantars fasciitis is still kicking but I am so tired of waiting for that to magically get better. I"m going to attempt to run.  I will ice my foot and stretch and roll it and do all the good things for it.  But I"m going to try it!!!!!

That is my plan.  Just focus.   I am not promising myself perfection.  If I promise myself perfection, then when life gets in the way and I have a less than perfect day, I will feel like a failure.  SO I am promising myself that I will try my hardest!  That's all I can do!   

I am not giving up.  Part of my plan is that I will be going to the doctor later in the year.  I want to go with the stats of a few weeks of really good behavior.....1200 calorie days and the results and the 1400 calorie days and the results and talk to her about the stats.  So if this little 'good behavior' works awesome...and if it doesn't, it will arm with me the necessary information to share with my doctor to get the help that I desperately need!!!

I've got this!

Surprise...I did it!

I know I know...I sometimes make bows and don’t keep them on here...but on Monday night I kept one of my vows!

I have been saying that I need to start exercising during the work week...and Monday night I took the first step.

Yes...I went for a run!   Oh my word...it was slow!  My arthritis in my knee has been kicking for a few weeks and I wasn’t sure how it would go.   But I didn’t dwell  on that and just went out.   I only did a mile!  It wasn’t pretty but I did it!    Ohh and while I was slow I was running/jogging every step of the way!   Go me!!

The weather has taken a sharp nose dive since then...it was about 60° when I ran on Monday evening...it is about 20° right now.  But I plan on doing something tonight or tomorrow night...two nights a week!   I want to run...but I will allow myself to default to the stair step thing that I have...20 minutes on that should suffice!

So here we go!   I can do this!!!  Exercise is my friend and will bring me close to my long term goals!!!

That weekend wiped me out

We had a busy busy weekend.  I almost had to go to work to relax and get some rest. Ok, not really!   But it was crazy busy!

Saturday we woke up and we didn’t fiddle around much.   We headed out early to hit all of our stores and do the errands.  (We hit three different grocery stores and one farm stand). We were done all of that by 9:30 and we were ready to roll shortly after that.   

Roll?  Well a bike ride of course!   We headed out toward the same park we had been to the previous week.  We were delighted with the weather....low 80°s and low humidity!!   Awesome!   We wanted to tackle the same trail that we had been on the previous week. And of course I wanted to try the ‘Hill’ that I call my nemesis....I will make it up this hill one day!!

We headed to my nemesis first.  I felt strong.  I was ready.  I did horrible!  Barely a few feet further than my very first attempt!   What the.....?  We retreated and started toward the trail we were planning to ride.  We started to talk about what I was doing and how to correct it.   Before I knew it we had turned around and we’re heading back toward my nemesis for a second attempt.  Not quite a total victory....but not a colossal failure.  I made it about 25 feet further than my previous best.   Slowly but surely I’ll get it!!!!

This time when we left the hill we didn’t go back...and it was time for the trail.   My legs felt strong.  I didn’t feel run down.  Sure, I had to walk my bike up a few hills.  (Seriously, how can they label this one trail as easy....it is horrible...it’s an incline...it has roots and rocks and all sorts of obstacles....I try it...but thus far I have had to always stop to walk!). But even in those places I had to walk, I felt strong.  

The problem?  I was riding sloppy.  Ok maybe it wasn’t me....maybe it was the slight dampness of the trail.  But I had a few near misses.  Most notably when I started to go down and was saved by....a thorny bush.  Luckily the thorn bush was quite thick and dense and it slowed my descent down enough that I was able to get my feet down and stop myself from a total fall.  There were a few other instances...but each time I merrily got back  on my bike and started riding again!

I seriously was feeling so good that as we headed back toward the car, I decided to add another trail!  I did it...safely.  But, that extra trail threw me into the ‘I’m wiped out’ category!   

We got home and it was still early afternoon.  So we showered and headed downtown to walk.  We stopped in some stores and just enjoyed ourselves. I’m sure the walking was a good way to stretch our legs after our ride...but by the time we had done that for a few hours I was absolute toast!  Done.  Finished.  A complete pile of mush!

I woke up on Sunday...I immediately knew I was still struggling with that feeling of being wiped out.  I had totally overdone it on Saturday.  Luckily, we had plans to see family (Jason’s family) to have a belated birthday celebration.  We also stopped to see my family for a bit.  Even with that low key day...I was so tired by the evening that I could barely function!

I guess that is the epitome of a great weekend...when your activities are so fun and awesome that you know you couldn’t have done one more thing!!!  All in all, it was a great weekend...and an active one! What could be better, we had fun and still worked on my weight loss goals.   A double win!!!   I couldn’t have asked for anything better!!  

Pushing onward: weight loss ups and downs

It was so difficult to go back to work after a four-day weekend. But alas, the bills need to be paid so both of us went back to work on Tuesday. We had a great weekend though!

We stayed busy over the weekend. And more specifically we tried to stay active. On Saturday we headed south and went to our favorite little hotel. It is an old 1950s Motel with a small pool. The pool water felt fabulous! We swam or at least treaded water for about 40 minutes. 

On Sunday and Monday both, we went to a bike trail and went mountain biking. 

Both of those days were incredible for different reasons. On Sundays ride I actually was on a trail that I loved doing! (I’ve done it before but this time it was actually joyous!). Sure, there were a few spots that were more difficult but for the most part I just had fun! Monday was a bit more difficult with my legs still recovering from the previous days ride.  But, I still attempted ‘the hill’. There is a hill on a fire road that I have been trying to make it to the top every time we bike in that area.   I try it every time we are there.  My theory is that I will improve every time!   Typically, I make it to about the same spot or maybe one bike length further up the hill… It really is slow progress, but I am persistent!  But something happened on our  Monday ride.   I don’t know what caused the change but I actually increased the distance that I climbed up that hill by about 30 to 50 feet! I was so over-the-top happy. I am still not even halfway up this hill, but I saw a huge leap in my progression!  Bring it on!!!!!

We celebrated Jason‘s birthday this weekend and even though I had showed a gain  on the scales for my official Friday weigh in,I am in this journey to live healthy....or in other words live my life but still make mostly healthy choices.  So yes, I did splurge on his birthday treat. Yes, it was a high calorie treat. One big splurge isn’t going to hurt me, I know that!   His choice? We got Cinnabon. I enjoyed every bite and I feel no regret. That was Saturday night and on Sunday night I bought a package of Reesie’s cups. I planned on just eating one cup that evening. I had calculated my calories and I had more than enough unused calories (remember a big bike ride...lots of earned calories). I was looking forward to my Reese‘s cup. But as I ate  my dinner, I begin to feel full. Oh, I still wanted the Reesie’s cup. However, I knew that I would enjoy it more if I actually wasn’t feeling so full. I also knew that I could have it any other night that I wanted (as long as I had the calories available) and, I knew that if Jason  ate it before I manage to get my Reesie‘s cup that I could just go to the store and buy another one. There was no reason for me to gobble up that Reesie’s cup , not when my body was telling me to stop eating. (And that package of Reece’s cups have yet to be opened!)  That is the epitome of living healthy!  I cut loose and lived this weekend....but I did it in moderation and I listened to my body!  Win!!!

I caved and listened to the weather reports and did not walk on Tuesday, nor did I walk anywhere.  I stayed at my desk like a slug!  Oops!

Yoga continues.   I didn’t do it over the weekend.  I just didn’t have the time...and my muscles got a good workout anyway!  It is still difficult for me but I am pushing through!  It’s going to get better right?  Ok, it had gotten better...I can see some things getting a bit easier!  But I’m still sweating like a roasting pig while I’m doing it!!!

So that is the update.  I’m waiting to see if my weight starts to drop.  It remained up all weekend (nope I showed no gain from the Cinnabon)...crossing my fingers that it starts to drop!  Please please please!!!  

The ups and downs of a weight loss journey.  That is how I would describe this past week or so!  It’s crazy but it is my journey! 

Choices in a weight loss journey

I want to be healthy. I want to be fit.   I want to do a lot of things in regards to my weight loss journey and more specifically my attempts to transform my life into a healthy lifestyle . But I struggle, I struggle badly.   The struggle is actually in the time management area.   How do I find the time to exercise?  How do I find the time to do anything?

I know I’ve talked about this a lot, but I’m just going to touch on what my daily life looks like so we can see what I’m up against. I wake up at 5:30AM or rather the alarm goes off at 5:30. By 6:30 I am heading out the door for work. I only live 20 miles away from my job but it takes an hour or more to get to work. Because my employer is quite strict about my start time, I leave an hour and a half before I have to be at work. Even then, some days I barely make it on time. Work and my unpaid lunch break suck up 8.5 hours and then I have the hour (if I’m lucky) drive home. I arrive home between 5:30  and 6PM I cook dinner every night (except Friday… that is delivery night and eat on paper plates night). So; by the time I make dinner, eat dinner and clean up I have already used at least an hour of hour and a half more of my already busy day… I will do the math for you… That means that it is now 7:30. I want to relax a little bit each evening ...that’s natural.  But remember, I wake up early, I’m wiped out and ready to fall asleep by 9 o’clock. (And if truth be known, I’m usually asleep on the couch before then!).  Even more importantly, my history with relationships has taught me how much I need to value and treasure and protect the relationship that I have now. That hour or so relaxing with Jason in the evening is my most treasured hour of the day! I don’t want to give it up! So how can I add something else  into my life during the work week?

So here I am, struggling to find time for exercise… And I just committed to creating videos. (OK the commitment is in my mind… It’s not some hard fast rule.) Jason and I talked about this YouTube channel and the creation of videos (which we want so that we can see the transformation and progression) and we made a promise that our relationship comes first… obviously. But how am I going to do this? How am I also going to do that AND  add in exercise during my weekdays?

Well, the first place I looked was the time that I mindlessly play games on my cell phone. This usually happens when I wake up super early before the alarm goes off (this seems to happen a lot) it also happens when Jason is watching something on TV that doesn’t interest me. And honestly, I have never been a huge fan of television. So that was my first question,  can I work on the creation of a video during those times? Well yes, I can. Furthermore, I find that I feel so much more alive when I am doing that versus the video games. It rejuvenates me and sparks that creative juice that is vital to my soul and personality.  (Seriously, my mind has been whirling with ideas and thoughts since I started!)

So the problem of when to work on the videos was solved easily stop wasting time on mindless pursuits on my cell phone. Instead of lying in bed at 4 AM playing  games and wasting time until the alarm goes off, I get up and I go mess around on my computer. (Most days ...some days you just need that quiet time!). Instead of mindlessly playing on my phone while Jason watches something that doesn’t interest me, I get on my computer and I am much happier than I ever would be watching TV… And, I’m still beside him and touching distance. (He has also expressed an interest in helping with the editing....after I figure it all out!)  One problem solved….honestly, with time to spare too!

Writing and this blog will always be a first to love. It’s definitely not going anywhere. I will still be writing my typical three posts a week. But that is also a thing of time management.  I will continue what I’ve been doing for a while now.  This post, was dictated while I drive into work. There is an hour or more one way, it just requires me to turn down the radio and talk. Sure, I’m going to need to go back and do some heavy editing but,  I edit my stuff anyway (although some days you may wonder if I did any editing). Luckily, most days are only an average of one hour for my commute which leaves an extra half hour once I get to work. Doesn’t that seem like the perfect time to edit and comment on your blogs?  I have also used that time in the parking garage while I sit in my car to record some quick video clips for intros!  Time well spent.

(And just for reference...I only had the final paragraph to write by the time I pulled into the parking garage...this whole post was written/dictated while driving...and luckily traffic was light so I had30 minutes to finish and edit it! Free time that would have been spent otherwise wasted!)

So now we come to the biggie, exercise. How in the world do I find time for that?
The weekends are easy. During the week I walk on my lunch break...not so much for the exercise, but to get out of the building and to stretch my legs since I work a desk job. So I do have that going for me…but I’m talking about some kind of formal exercise.

My mind has grappled with week day exercise for quite some time. About a year ago a coworker made the comment that if you want it bad enough you will find the time. You will do it even if it means waking up early, watching one less TV show, playing one less video game or whatever you have to cut or adjust in order to make it happen.   Her words stuck with me, I have been wanting to go running during my work week but I don’t want to run in the dark super early in the morning, for safety reasons. (Protective boyfriend alert) So that leaves after work running. If you’ve read my blog you know I struggle with working out after work because of the shortage of time and because it takes away from the time that I am with Jason. (Yeah, I’m a sappy one…but hey, I love him!)  But on Wednesday of this week, I was driving home thinking about running. All of a sudden I realized something.  I might take 20 to 30 minutes once or twice a week from my time with Jason, but it is an investment in my future with Jason. You see, if I’m healthy and fit, the odds are that I will live a more active, healthy and longer life.  I am thus adding value and time to my future with him! (Deep, I know!). It just made me realize how incredibly important this weight loss journey is. Right now, I am planning on Tuesday and Thursday evenings for a run. By planning the day, I can also try to plan meals that are easy to prepare or possibly even pre-make to just pop in the oven. Wednesday night I put together a casserole that I could throw in the oven with only minimal prep work on Thursday, eliminating some time in the kitchen. And guess what?  I did it.  I ran Thursday night.

Yes, I talked to Jason about my revelation and he is in agreement that investing that time in my health is important. (Yeah, it still blows my mind that I found a man that not only puts up with my craziness and goofy antics but also wants a long future with me. How did I get so lucky?)

So that brings me to one last item that I hope to work into my schedule. I have been reading a blog about someone that has decided to do a 30 day challenge with yoga. (Click here for a here link to her blog) OK, in fairness she’s almost done with her 30 day challenge. But I was interested from day one. It was the time management that messed me up and kept me from trying it. But she continued to post about the benefits that she was feeling, the changes in her body and all the good stuff. I also know that yoga is really good for core strength and general strength overall…which will help greatly with biking and running. So after talking it over with Jason, to get his opinion;  my plan is to start this morning...so my alarm was set for 4:45 (vibrating alarm on my watch so as to not wake him). I am actually going to do it instead of just talking talk about it!!!!  (Each day of the 30 day challenge is different in length so some days I may not have to wake it up quite so early) it is time to stop wasting time in my day. It is time to stop dreaming about doing something and just do it!  I would rather say I tried it and it didn’t work versus end up saying ‘if I had only....”


It really does boil down to figuring out what is most important to you.  Is reaching your weight loss goals important?  Or is it more important to play a few mindless games on your phone.   Does being thin outweigh a few extra moments of sleep?  Does the chance of a longer lifetime where we are both healthy outweigh a few stolen minutes of time with Jason?   The answer is yes.  The choice is ours.  What is important?  If I always sit and cry and whine about not having time but then find the time for other random pursuits, then I have no right to say that I don’t have time.   So, I am making my choice!  I’ve got this!