I'm so frustrated! Last week I was doign really good with my diet and exercise. This week I'm doing the same. Really good...YET, last week the scales just dropped and dropped. THIS week, they are going UP! Go figure! Yes, I'm renewing my focus on this process! I've come way to far to give up. Not htat I've ever thought seriously about giving up. BUT I know that when my focus slips I am at risk of just kinda slipping off the program and putting on weight. I've got 34 pounds until I am considered in my healthy weight bracket. 34 pounds until I am not considered overweight! I'm just moving out of the obese category now..woo hooo. BUT 34 pounds! Sounds like a lot until I realize where I've been and how far I've already come! BUT so I'm frustrated this week! Meanwhile, the couch to 5 K thing is going well. I was out yesterday morning. I'm really amazed that I'm not sore and miserable doing it! I don't wake up and go "yippee, I'm gonna run/jog today" but I don't dread it with all my being. Kinda funny eh?

Results

Well...my home scales showed me at having lost about 5 pounds. The weight watchers oficial weigh in put me at 3.2 pounds down. I'm happy with that. I'll take it! I'm planning on working hard to not gain an ounce of that back!

Went out running today. Day one of week three! Woo hooo! All seems to be going ok with that. I'm amazed at how I'm doing with it!

It should be good!

According to the home scales it should be a good weigh in tonight! Woo hooo!

Nerves after eating

I've been planning out my day food wise. I've been following it pretty closely and eating only what I have the daily points for (I haven't used a single flex point this week...nor have I eaten any of my AP's) But, I've noticed that like after I ate and I'm sitting here in the evening, my mind kinda wonders how I'm doing. I'm nervous about what if I actually gained today? I know that if I follow my points that I won't gain..but it is still there in my head.

So, like I said; I've been planning out my food and following it pretty closely. Tomorrow I have off of work....I'm hoping that I can follow and do ok. I don't know what we are doing for breakfast. I'd prefer to eat at home...however Todd has been pushing to go to Panera Bread for a bagel for breakfast...so we may end up doing that. Then for lunch we are having BLT's (ww bread, etc etc etc) and probably soup...some of my home canned. Then we are going out for dinner. That is what worries me. I don't know what I will be having for dinner adn I don't want to blow it! I've got to be super careful! I can do this!!!!!

Saturday morning and I've got to work

Todd and I are planning on going to the gym this morning to work out. Part of me says to just go jogging on the battlefield...but it would be nice to do some weights...plus I'd get a bigger workout at the gym!

The scales showed me even lower this morning! I need to remain totally vigilant! Becuase I don't want to balloon right up like I did last week! (Realistically it should be easier for me this week. I am working on Monday, so I only have one day off to really watch myself. I usually do very good when I'm at work). Regardless, I'm going to knock this crappy weight right out of my life! So far this week I've been VERY good! Last night conceivably would have been a very heavy dinner. However, I planned out exactly what I was having.....and I ate the rest of the day accordingly. And you know what? I enjoyed dinner all that much more! I didn't go over my points. I used my points though. (No flex points at all). I'm so very proud of myself.

Evening update

I've done pretty well today. I actually have one point left! Woo hooo! I'll probably have a fudge bar later! I've also planned out what I'm eating tomorrow because mom and dad will most likely be eating with us tomorrow evening...hamburgers on the grill. I know that hamburgers will be a bit of a higher points meal...so I've laid out what I'm eating the whole day tomorrow! (Lunch is lots of zero points foods). Right now I've got it so that I will actually have 4 points to spare...oops three because I want a piece of fat free cheese on my burger! But that gives me a little leeway!

Todd asked me to get up in the morning and garden with him. SOOOO I"m planning on setting the alarm for 6AM...getting up on my own, eating my breakfast (toast and jelly...two points thanks to weight watchers bread) and then going on my jog. I'm usually out for about 35 minutes when I'm doign my jog thing. Then I'll come home and be out in the garden by 7AM! That will give me at least two unrestricted hours in the garden....getting me inside by 9AM...and I can then shower and have a few minutes to rest. NOW....depending on when mom and dad are coming to eat, I may need to put together one of the dishes tonight so that Todd can put it in the oven about a half hour before I get home....I would have time tomorrow morning instead of resting, however I'd rather not be rushed! I may actually go ahead and pat out the burgers, slice the onion (etc) tonight also.....all depending on when we eat. If we don't eat until 6, I'd have time for the basic things (just not the one dish that needs an hour and half to bake)

This running thing is quite interesting though. It's amazing. I don't want to do it...but yet when I'm done I feel so awesome! Totally crazy. Knowing that I'll probably have that awesome feeling is what is really helping me to actually get off my butt and do it...especially in the morning when I'd much rather stay in bed! :-)

I guess I could garden tomorrow morning...and run on both Saturday and Sunday instead of doing Friday/Sunday thing! I guess that wouldn't hurt me! I'm just afraid that if I don't do it, I will get off schedule and never do it again! I guess I'll have to see what time I go to bed tonight and how I feel in the morning!

I'm GOING to get this weight off! I'm going to get my weight away from the 200's! I refuse to give up and fail!

Yesterday I did so very good. I used up my points.......yes, every last one of them. HOWEVER, I didn't go over my points at all...I exercised...and I feel good about myself.

whew!

Ok, so last week I did the three days of the couch to 5 k. I jogged for one minute and walked for two minutes. Today I started week two of my 'program'. I upped the ante to jogging for 2 minutes and walking for two minutes. HOWEVER, the last 4 minutes of the 20, I jogged the whole time! We'll see how I feel tonight. haa haa haa But, as of right now, I don't feel too badly!

So, whew.....week tow has begun! It truely is amazing to me. I kinda dread going out...but when I come back....wow, the feeling is utterly amazing! I feel as if I've been washed clean!

I honestly didn't do too badly over the past week. I was maybe one or two points over each day...but heck, that's what flex points are for! There was one day that I did actually go over on my points...but I had the flex points there! Oh why am I one of these people that can't use flex points or else I gain??? Oh well...no use crying about something I can't change! I exercised 6 days. I worked in the garden for a couple hours at least twice. There is no reason that I should have gained. Yet, gain I did. I gained .6 pounds. Doesn't sound like much right? But, put that with the .8 pounds I gained last week....oops there's a pound! PLUS, it puts me over 200 again! That is the worst of it! Losing the onederland thing hurts the most!

My plan for this week. Number one, ABSOLUTELY no flex points used. NOT EVEN ONE! I'm eating straight daily points. Number two, measure out my foods! And number three, EXERCISE! I plan on exercising each morning again. I also want to try to get some exercise in in the evening also...somehow! (I will say though...that the last few months, I've been more active then I have in YEARS! I actually have the energy to move, to get up and do things!)

woo hoooo day two

Day two.....came, conquered! I'll admit, those muscles were talking to me while I was out today! BUT, I did it! AND I felt so good and proud of myself afterwards! I did my 20 minutes....1 jog/2 walk! One more day of that (the plan is to do that on Sunday.....unless we go for a big ride or something like that) and then next week knock it up to 2 jog/2 walk if I can. I know that right now I'm very ready for the jog segments to be done, but they aren't totally killing me!

My weight was down about a half pound this morning! I so want to get myself out of the two hundred range......not this one or two pounds away..that's too close for comfort!

Day 2 will soon be upon me

Rode my bike this morning on the battlefield. The muscles that I used yesterday were screaming in misery. Ok, they weren't that bad...however they were twinging a bit. I do plan on going out tomorrow morning and taking day two of my couch to 5 k. Admittedly, part of me wants to give up and skip it. However another part of me wants that feeling that I had the other day after I finished. I'm planning on getting up early enough to do it.....so I can come home....shower and get to my interview with time to spare. I refuse to use this interview as an excuse not to do day two!

My weight held solid from yesterday to today. Hopefully I drop some for my home weigh in tomorrow. If not, at least by my Tuesday weigh in!!!

Update on how I'm doing

Surprisingly, I'm not that sore....yet (maybe I should wait to write my update tomorrow morning). Oh yeah, every once in a while I move and I'm like, ohhh a little bit of discomfort. BUt nothing earth shattering...nothing lasting...and nothing more than a slight momentary twinge! I did feel a little bit of discomfort in my knees....but otherwise I think the knees will be ok for another go at this couch to 5 k thing on Friday.

Feel pretty good with myself today. I did eat something that I shouldn't have had....arrgghh Willpower willpower where art thou, willpower! But, it could have been worse! I'm determined to get that scale moving downward....and KEEP it moving downward. Not this lose for 1 or 2 weeks and then gain! No more of that stuff!

Weigh in

I had a slight gain at my weigh in last night. I gained .8 pounds. I know that some of that is water retention as it is the 'bad week' of the month for me. The ick is upon me....yuck yuck yuck. But, realistically...I just didn't do that well. I didn't journal like I should have. I just didn't care. The main reason I don't journal....because I've been bad and I just plain don't know how to mark down my food intake!

SOOOO this morning I rolled myself out of bed. Ate my oatmeal. Donned my newly designated running clothes and out I went. I did the first day of my couch to 5 k program. I did modify it. Instead of running for 1 minute and walking for 1.5 minutes. I did a run for 1 minute and walk for 2 minutes. I'm using a kitchen timer....digital thank goodness as my timer and it only does minutes...and doesn't show me seconds so this was easier. Plus, I'm a big girl. I think I'm going to have to take this a bit slower than some. I am totally amazed though at how I'm feeling now. I got back about 40 minutes ago. I feel really good. VERY proud of myself. My knees don't hurt...nor does my foot. Those were the two things that I was pretty worried about. SO far so good! :-)

You don't see many fat runners........could that be because running melts the pounds off of a person? I can only hope!

Golly Gee

Last week the weight just seemed to drop off me...this week I can't give a pound away! What the heck??? Then this morning I had a momentary lapse in my weight watching sanity. Yes, I ate 3 cupcakes. I made them for the thing we are going to tonight. I purposely waited until this morning to make them. So I would have them in the house for a least amount of time possible! I still ate THREE! (they wouldn't fit on the tray that I was getting ready.....so what to do with the ones that don't fit...why of course, you eat them!)

I haven't exercised...I so need to get back into that religiously! I'm very interested in doing the couch to 5K program. I'm not sure that my knees and feet can handle running..but I do think that it is worth a try! You don't see many fat runners, that's for sure! I know running burns mad calories...so heck. I need to print up the plan...and maybe tomorrow morning go out and try!

Movement

The scales are moving downward again! Woo hooo! I erally worked to makes ure that I got in more than 10K steps yesterday! Tonight Todd and I are going to go for a bike ride when I get off work. Then when we come home I'm gonna have ham steaks on the grill. Todd wanted pasta salad. I'm going to forgo that (that's the plan) and have veggies! :-) Woo hooo. I've already entered the ham steak, my lunch items that are in my lunch box and my breakfast. And I will have like 10 points for my veggies and such! So I'll be able to have a dessert something (probably a weight watchers sundae cup)!!!! That's exciting to me!

Tomorrow night Todd and I are planning on having dinner as soon as I get home and then going over to work on the mess some more. Joy joy.

If I can just keep the weight going down, I'll be happy!!!

Crash and Burn!

On monday morning I weighed myself and I was absolutely tickled. My weigh in was looking GOOOOOD for Tuesday. I was down 4 pounds. Yes, FOUR pounds! Things were lookin' good. Todd and I had decided to go biking, so we donned our clothes and went out. We rode for about 2.5 hours and then headed to lunch. Lunch was in the name of Macaroni's. Yep...I ate poorly. THEN that evening I had a country ham sandwhich! (Sodium city). I weighed myself on Tuesday morning....3 pounds up! ArrgghhH! Oh well, at least I had lost 4 and only gained three! And yes, my official weigh in was true to the home weigh in......I lost one pound. I'm tickled that I lost one pound though! I'm just not gonna do anything stupid like that again! (Ok, I'll try not to!)

So, I'm back trying to watch closely to what I'm eating and doing. I didn't exercise today. However I did make sure I got at least 10K steps in today! Point wise I'll be ok also!

I will conquer this!!!

How in the world is this happening?

I woke up yesterday morning and low and hehold, my weight had dropped some??? Go figure! I had my bit of temptation that I gave into on Thursday and my weight still dropped???? Last night after work I went over and worked cleaning out the mess for about 2-3 hours. I came home and made dinner. I had a snack between work and the couple hours of cleaning, but I was really hungry for a 'real' meal. So when I was cooking for our dinner (Todd was working late...thus it was later than normal for us to be eating), I just kept snitching foods.....mainly grated parmesian cheese.....craziness! HOW IN THE WORLD THEN, are the scales showing me lower yet this morning? I just don't understand it. Ohh yes, did I mention that I haven't exercised ONCE this week????? It truly is a mystery!

YUCK!

Even after just posting how good I feel when I'm in control and all that stuff, I blew it today. I woke up and just felt blah. I was short tempered with my husband (the poor guy...guess I'll have to make it up to him later tonight), I felt like just curling up and doing nothing! I didn't give in though. I went to work. My boss was running late, so it was just me at work. Now, in case you don't know...I work at a deli. Lots of food....lots of temptation. I set about getting the deli set up for another day of business and the temptation got the best of me. Yes, the salami was calling my name. I had a slice. I washed my hands and went back to work. It still called out to me. I repeated that process. Oh yes, I repeated the process a few more times! BAD, bad bad! Even while I was doing it I knew that I was blowing my day! I didn't stop! I even thought about how I would feel....the confidence thing would not be there. Did it stop me??? Absolutely not! I don't expect to be perfect...at least not every day. BUT, it still rankles when I mess up!

After work Todd and I went to our property to clean up some more of the mess that was left there by his step father. Nasty dirty mess! We are trying to salvage what we can....sending stuff to goodwill. While also saving some memories of his grandmother and mother (both of whom have passed away in the last year) and whose stuff was there. We got held up there and ended up eating dinner out. We live in the ountry and we had limited time before Todd had clients booked at the studio. So our options were few. It was either Battleview (convience store from hell) or The Red Byrd.....a diner. Yes, we ate at the diner. I didn't do too badly...until you remember that I had ohhhh 8 slices of salami earlier. I should have eaten only zero point items!!!

No use crying over spilled milk! Tomorrow is another day!

I've sents some feelers and applications out for a new job tonight. Hopefully something that I will enjoy and that pays somewhat decently will come my way soon! I'm still very interested in waitressing...it'd be good for activity! :-)

I had a fair day.....I stayed on plan and did pretty good eating wise. I didn't however get any exercise in. I did however walk more than 10K steps today. I so need to get back into the exercise hardcore! I know that it truely is the key to losing consistently...and decent amounts each week. At least I have the food thing down!

I am amazed though at how much my confidence takes a boost when I feel like I have control of my eating. I really have seen a difference in how I feel about myself and how I act. I am proud of myself for conquering this problem. Likewise, when things are not going, I really don't feel too good about myself. I feel like I've let myself down......in essence I guess I have...I've lost control!

I'm back in onederland! I'm so happy to be back! I lost 2.8 pounds this week. We had our normal 'big/comfort' meal tonight after my weigh in...but otherwise, I'm back and ready to roar through another week and lose some more!