How honest are we with ourselves? I like to think that I am an honest person. In fact, I would say that I pride myself on my complete honesty. Admittedly, I may word things in such a way that it is not a lie but rather emphasizes the truth while hiding the negative, but it is true. But with myself...and my weight loss journey I sometimes have not been completely honest with myself. And yes, it hurts me to admit it! And even worse, this is not the first such post! You can read how I was dishonest with myself from way back in 2013 here. Sadly, I am not alone. I imagine that most everyone on a weight loss journey has lied to themselves.
We lie about what we are eating when we are gaining weight. A closet eater is hiding how much they are eating...putting a false/lie front to the world saying 'I don’t know why I'm gaining , do you see me eating any cakes, candy or cookies?' While on the journey have you ever fudged your tracking...skipped putting on those bites licks and tastes (the BLT's)? what about that handful of potato chips that you nibbled on while making dinner....the sliver of butter you added to your toast...I mean, it’s only 32 calories, does it really matter?
I need to admit that I have done it! sometimes it’s been an oversight that causes me to 'lie' to myself. Sometimes it is a plain 'if I don’t write it then I must not have eaten it mentality. But that’s a lie! (That particular lie usually proceeds a cease and desist from tracking all my food.)
Lies can be about the exercise we are doing. The intensity or the time spend exercising. Lies can be about water consumption. 'Why yes I drank 64 ounces yesterday!' But what about the half cup of ice that remained. (True story...my Yeti tumblers always have ice in them at the end of the day....which means that I didn’t drink the FULL amount that they hold. (Love love love mine...I actually have a few of these and have my eye one a new one/different color.)
So let’s face it. we lie in weight loss journeys. Lies and mistruths are what got us to obesity. Lies are what keep us in the obese category. But who is that lie hurting? Myself! Furthermore, does the world really believe the lie that someone is eating perfectly when they are 100 pounds overweight? (Or even 50 pounds...or 20!) Weight related lies only hurt the liar…and are visible for the world . There is no poker face for this lie...our bodies reveal the truth.
where did this come from? Yesterday morning I entered my food for the day into myfitnesspal. I was happy with the calorie count for the day. i headed to work and I had my planned lunch. i even looked at the candy jar that my coworkers were digging through and walked on by. no candy for me! (true story) But around midafternoon I noticed a flurry of activity out on the teller line and one gal hurried out the door. I ambled out of my office to see what was happening. The financial advisor that services our branch was at our location and they had just discovered it was his birthday. Luckily grocery stores carry readymade birthday cakes! Yes, I had a cupcake. Last night i had a moment where I seriously thought about not entering it into my tracker. And I didn’t do it...if it’s not tracked then i must not have happened right??? So, I didn’t track it...until this morning! This morning as i was getting ready to enter today’s food I realized my omission for what it was.... a straight up lie to myself. I backtracked and added that cupcake! I also added a pile of cough drops.... because cough drops are my savior right now!!! (I think it’s just sinus drainage causing the tickle that causes my dry hacking cough.... who knows.... but cough drops are my best friend). Am I being silly about adding my cough drops....one is only 10 calories...but what about the fact that i had 10....or 20! 10 cough drops is 100 calories...20 is 200!!! I think it was closer to 10...so that is what i went with!
It is time to be honest with myself. It is time to hold myself to the same standards about lies that i hold for all other aspects of my life. It is time to be honest!
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