Body Image

Timothy over at Timothology  has been pondering the concept of body image.  He has been relating the dissatisfaction with our bodies  to the images in our media...the perfect images that we see in magazines and ads.  At the same time It is interesting because my friend  Sherry and I have also been talking about body image. We have been talking mainly about how we see ourselves and in particular our bodies.   I know that I have a very warped sense of my body image.  I don't see myself the way that I am.  When I weighed 315 pounds I looked in the mirror and I saw a 'normal' sized person.  The crazy thing happened though when I lost the weight...I looked in the mirror and saw the fat MaryFran.  Nuts I tell you!  The scales can be telling me that I'm losing mad pounds and I don't see it at all.  It makes it difficult sometimes.  (I can see it in pictures...I remember once when I was 'thin' I saw a picture of  this girl at his studio, draped over his board...I was MAD that he was posing with her...SERIOUSLY MAD.....until he gently reminded me that I had lost weight and that the girl in the pictures was ME!)  Soo how does one right these warped body image issues???

SOooo the last month has been a struggle with the weight loss.....I really haven't lost much...I've been sitting pretty steady at my weight.  That's ok...I'm doing what I need to be doing and I know the weight WILL come off.  (That said, I want it off NOW...ha ha ha).  But yesterday evening I was looking for a picture on my cell phone and low and behold I realized that I had two pictures of myself...same position....same outfit....roughly 1.5 to 2 months part.  Hmmmmmm  The scales may not be showing results but I do believe I can see a bit of a difference. 

Mid February 2013

April 4, 2013

I will admit to sucking my gut in during both of those shots!  ha ha ha

This morning I got out and ran.  This is my first nice weather run outdoors!  I felt naked without my umpteen layers of clothes!   My plan for improving my running?   I've decided upon this.  Right now I am going to work on increasing my distance.  Last week I was running 2 miles.  This week (today) I'm upping it to 2.5 miles.   I will run the 2.5 miles this week.  Next week I will bump it up to 3 miles.  I will run 3 miles every run next week.  At that point I will be right at the mileage I need for a 5k (OK who's counting those extra tenths....chump change).  I will then look at my time from my runs for the 3 mile week.  If I'm running the 3 miles in 45 minutes...then the following week my goal will be to run the 3 miles in 42.5 minutes.  And the following week running the 3 miles in 40 minutes.  Each week pushing myself to go faster.  This is my plan....lets see how it works! 

Exercise

Had a huge malfunction today. My exercise top ride up while I ran. So I kept having to tug it down. Luckily it was cold and that was only my bottom layer, by it was awkward. But run I did! It was a straight jog...no intervals. Still slow as a slug but I'm doing it!

I came home and immediately completed my 30 day shred workout. I'm good to go for a whole. I plan on walking tonight with sherry so there is another hour of exercise! I just want this fat gone.

As badly as I want to snap my fingers and have the fat gone, I'm ok with the process. It's a process of learning and finding out what works for my body right now.

Had a scrumptious breakfast of stuffed apple French toast after my workouts. I'm showered and dressed and ready to face my day!!!!!

A before and after picture of me as requested. :-)

Should I label them...or are they self explanatory? LOL






Nice little update. Day two went well. I did come up with an excuse early this morning as to why I shouldn't exercise first thing. And then it haunted me all day.....I came home and before I even ate dinner I exercised. Yea me! I have kept my eating under control. I did splurge a bit...I did have the daily points....I had a banana, 1/2 cup of 2 point ice cream, and a little chocolate syrup. That was the end of my daily points. And I am still feeling full from that snack! BUT I made it another day!

A reminder of how far I've come

Thought I would put a reminder on to show where I have come from! BLEECHHHH I never want to go back there!!!

December 2007 Pictures

I just downloaded a TON of pictures off of my camera and spare card. Uhhh yeah, pictures from the last two months! I was scanning through the pictures and came across this next picture. My first thought, for a split second was, "Who is this girl? ANd why is there a picture of her on my camera?" But, before I could grill Todd about this mysterious woman, I realized that it was me! ME! Todd was taking pictures in the studio when I walked in and he had me pose up by the new reel to reel and the semi-new mixing console.
The next picture is definitely not new. IN fact, it is a picture from Christmas 2005. I thought I would put this in here as a reference...to remind myself of how far I have come.
Yes, this next picture is the matching pose to the previous one.....however this next picture was taken just this week, Christmas 2007. It is definitely not the most flattering pic of me, in my baggy sweatshirt...but oh well...the difference is still drastic!
This holiday was fun, with Alan and Cindy and the kids visiting. This next picture is of Riley and Alison. Riley is 7 1/2 years old and Ali will be 5 on Feb. 1.
Of course the newcomer to the family is Alex. He was a bit shy around me at first.....but he is an absolute doll baby! He will be one year old on Feb. 1.

Finally some Pictures!

This one was taken of me in January of 2003. I was probably somewhere near my highest weight when this picture was taken. (300+ pounds)

These last two pictures are of me today, November 6, 2007. I weighed in this morning at 183 pounds.

Yes, I've still got a ways to go. I see the negatives when I look at the picture...but when I look at before and after side by side...eii yiii yiii,the negatives don't seem as big (no pun intended)

Woke up, and as it is my 'off' day for exercise I putzed around the house for an hour or two. Todd and I then went on a nice hike. Only about an hour.....but it was wonderful. We hiked a trail on the battlefield that we had recently discovered but never hiked. IT was a bit rugged, but nothing difficult. Felt good to be out in the brisk fall air!

I'm hoping tha tmy body is adjusting to the cool. Last fall and winter I was FREEZING...this year, while I get chilled, so far it's nothing really bad! No where near like it was last year!

Today is my short day at work. Woo hooo! So I don't have to go in until 2PM. After work I'll head up to my Weight Watchers meeting. Hopefully the scales at home and the scales there are compatible today (some days I wonder....)