Friday, January 25, 2013

Feeling stronger everyday

I saw this the other day and little did I know that it was going to have such a profound impact on my mentality later this week. Yesterday I listened to my body and did no exercise.  I was starting to feel better but just still felt sluggish and run down.  I did however have to do some work in the kitchen.  Mainly, I had to make cookies for a workshop that our business is hosting on Saturday and I had to make Chocolate covered cherries (filled with cheesecake filling) for a co-workers going away party today (Friday).  I ate my food...and then I had a cookies worth of cookie dough and a baked cookie.  I then had a chocolate covered strawberry.   Yes, I went over my allotment of calories for my day.   Yes, I tracked!

I had planned on making a few kinds of cookies.  I however stopped baking midway through my baking marathon.  Why?   Because I knew that I had already consumed too much and that if I kept baking, I would consume more.  I KNEW I would.  There was no talking me out of it.  I KNEW it would happen.  So I stepped away from the kitchen.

I am at war with myself.  Part of me wants to scream that yesterday was a total failure.  I didn't manage to stay within my 1300 calorie goal.  HOWEVER, I was only slightly over 1500 calories.  I didn't blow it and eat 3000 or 4000 calories.  I went over by 200 calories.  Which is still a respectable calorie count.  Was it what I am for?  No.   Was it terrible?  No.    So I am going to count yesterday as a victory.  It could have been MUCH MUCH worse....but I kept my eating in line to lose (just not at the rate that I normally do).  Meanwhile, I learn from my mistakes.  :-)  That is what is making me stronger!

Today...potluck at work.  GRRR   I'm really going to do my best to keep this under control today!!!  I don't know what dinner holds, so I can't even say I've got 'such and such amount of calories."   So I am being tested and I WILL SUCCEED!


Gwen said...

Good for you, for removing yourself from a situation you couldn't control. Try and look at all the food at the potluck objectively, as if you were your doctor. What would your doctor recommend that you eat or not eat? Try to stick to salads and protein. Go light on any salad dressing. Feel the POWER that comes from CONTROLLING your choices, and not giving in to temptations that are counter-productive to your goals. I'm sure you'll report successes tomorrow! You've got this!

Cathy said...

Someone told me to chew on some gum while I was baking at Christmas time. It helped, I still "tasted" too much, but it was better than if I hadn't had the gum. :-)

Anonymous said...

You're doing well MaryFran. I find too that I need to get myself out of a situation because my mind will just meditate on food lol. I am a repeat offender in my eating. You comment about learning from your mistakes made me stop and ask myself if that's what I do. And if not, then I really need to start doing that. You can face the potluck with resolve. You can do it.

Eesh said...

Ahhh yes the dreaded urge to taste what you bake. You did well hun. You removed yourself from the situation.
Keep up the good work. You're doing awesome!