Monday, April 14, 2008

I alway said that I didn't start losing weight until I accepted myself for myself and said. You know, I'm overweight. I'm goign to accept the fact thaI did this to myself. I dont' have to like it but I accept it. I accept the extra rolls of fat around my stomach. Yes, I'm going to try to change...but I accept it. Maybe I need to accept the fact that I'm no longer morbidly obese. I still think of myself in terms of being 300 plus pounds. I have my admirer that comes through the drive through here at work. (I think I told you about that, a customer~he's about 8 years older than I~ gave me a note that said, I think you are so hot). But in my mind I'm still thinking, how can he think someone that weighs what I do is hot. I'm a tub of lard. Could this be part of the reason i'm not it a mental block...I've got to accept myself for what I am NOW.....hmmmm food for thought. (ohhhhhh bad pun!)

I was amazed at myself yesterday. Mom and I drove to this fabulous kitchen shoppe (gadgets and gizmo's galore, a perfect heaven for someone that loves that type of word, we were giddy with it all). She hadn't had lunch so when I stopped to get a drink at Wendy's (I had already downed my 64 ounces of I splurged and drank a diet coke. Yep that's my splurge) she got a small fry. (made me made, she's trying to lose, she's diabetic. Shall I continue??) Anyway, she offered me some. I had two. And then I was like, "They really don't taste all that great", so I stopped. I'll admit, I "wanted" more. But I realized that I didn't really like them and was able to stop.

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