Wednesday, February 19, 2020

Believing in myself

I have come to a realization recently that my mind is my worst enemy.  Ok, maybe that’s not a new realization…but it was brought to the forefront (again) recently.   My mind is a strong tool that can be used for or against me in this weight loss journey….and really in life.  Yes my mind!

I have always known that my imagination is strong and can affect me in so many ways.  Seriously, if someone around me talks about how they were sick and throwing up all morning before they came to work…. suddenly my stomach starts to hurt and I’m convinced that I’m coming down with whatever ails them.  I have to mentally talk myself off the ledge of panic, because I KNOW that it is a trick that my mind is playing.   So it should come as no surprise that this kind of thing happens in weight loss also.  But it shocks me every time!

A few weeks ago I decided to join Weight Watchers (WW).  I was so excited and I knew that WW was going to be the solution to my struggling journey.  Of course it was!   I started so strong.  I was excited.  I lost over four pounds.  WOO HOO!  Go me!  I was on fire!   I was secretly excited because I was sure that I could make it into the 220’s by the end of the month of February.  Easy peasy, nothing was going to stop me as I rolled into my second week on Weight Watchers!

I had day one of my second week planned out and I was strong.  Ok, I was strong until the unexpected arrival of pizza for our team.  Oh yeah, pizza.  You can read about it here  but if you don’t’ have time, let me just say that I caved…and I had two pieces of pizza.  Yup.   Now, I know that there are weekly points to account for these little extras.  I know it.  That is what makes the program work.  It allows for those extras….those days…those moments in life.  It allows us to live.

So why in the world did I begin to almost immediately panic.  Why indeed?   I know that I typically use some of my weekly points (eat higher calories) on the weekends but I had blown so many of my weekly points on the first day that I knew that I wanted to keep my points low for the weekend.  I worked that plan!  I managed.  I ate zero point foods.  I didn’t have any sweet treat.  I was doing it.  I was actually showing great success….in my actions.   However, in my head I was sure that the pizza had totally annihilated my good efforts.   Oh yes, I was sure that the two pieces of pizza on that first day of my weigh in week was going to totally mess up the numbers on the scales…..numbers that I would be looking at a full 7 days later.  My mind was convinced, even as I counted my points and managed and worked to stay within my lower points.   I just knew it in my mind.

All week long I talked about the mental warfare.  Seriously, I knew I was battling this in my mind!  I tried my hardest!  I really did.  Yet when it came time to weigh myself for my official weigh in I was up about a pound. 

Self-fulfilling prophecy maybe?  I don’t know if my mind has that much capability, but isn’t it interesting?  And yes, there may have been one or two other things at play (hormones from the monthly ick for one) so I can’t say it was all a gain caused by my mental status.  But it sure made me think!

There is a reason that I named my website, “Belief in Myself”.  You see, I realized a long time ago that I really need to believe in myself.  I need to have faith in my abilities and my efforts.  I need to believe that I can do it.  Because if I believe that I can not do it……I will not be able to do it!


This applies to so many areas, not just losing weight.  I have to believe that I can climb these mountains when we are hiking.  I have to believe that I can ride these trails when I’m biking.  I need to believe in myself.  Our bodies are amazing things and we need to start believing in them!


Anonymous said...

very true

Sarah said...

You are strong and can do anything you set your mind to.

*Stained Glass Butterfly* said...

Mental warfare is a great way to describe it! I stopped believing in myself a long time ago, and it shows. I stopped taking care of myself in so many ways. My mind is also my worst enemy, but I am working on a truce.