Good Day

Today was a good day. I had a really good workout this morning!!!!!! Worked out for an hour! I ate wisely all day....for dinner I made Szechuan Chicken and Rice. Yummy! (ok, those of you who know me are probably laughing thinking about me eating an Asian inspired dish..when I'm not a big 'Asian' food lover...but it really is a yummy recipe.....if you want..just ask and I'll share) I then rode the exercise bike for about 30 minutes tonight. The second small workout was not becuase I overate or anything. It's because I just wanted to.

Work went well...fast and relatively smooth. It was a short day for me...so that was nice. :-) I got to spend a good deal of time talking to Janet during the down time...which is always a plus for me. No deep conversations today...but fun non-the-less.

TOdd found a picture of me that he is going to print out. I'd wager a guess that it's me at probably close to my highest weight. NOt something I really WANT to remember but something that I NEED to remember! So, I need to print it out and put it with my other 'fat' pictures. (this one that I found is the biggest...by far!)

A day off

Mom and dad came to dinner tonight. We had a nice time together. I so enjoy spending time with my parents. Dad brought his laptop and worked a while. In the meantime, mom and I must have been getting tired, because we sat in the living room enjoying each others company...but occaisionally laughing like hyena's at the simplest thing. :-)

I had meatloaf, mashed potatoes, corn and sauerkraut (and baked beans for dad). Not exactly the healthiest options out there. BUt managed and eaten accordingly. I've got just enough leftovers of the veggies that I'll be able to have a little smorgasboard of veggies tomorrow. Just about 1/2 cup of everything. Oh yes, and for dessert...home canned pears. YUMMY! I did step aerobics this morning. Felt good.

Todd and I got some stuff done today. We took another load of stuff to the mission. We are really making a dent in getting this stuff out of the trailer. We went to the board of zoning and planning and talked to them about the options for our land. We got some REALLY good news. It has been rezoned.....the old zoning was very restrictive....whereas the new zoning is no restrictions! We also got a few things from Lowes....a new screen door, wood for a repair...and electric line to fix the dryer electrical line (dryer repair guy...you better not be trying to get Lowes out of replacing our dryer that is still under warranty!!!)

Oh well...I think I'm going to retire to the bedroom and read for a bit. Todd has to get up early to work....and I don't have to be at work until 2PM.....woo hooo....I can exercise in the morning (that is not sarcasm...I prefer to exercise in the morning)!!!

The Birthday Boy

This morning Todd and I woke up and as we laid in bed cuddling he asked me what time I had to be at work. I answered Noon. He then started to talk about his 'birthday morning' plans. I was a bit paniced.....I didn't want to eat out. However, he simply wanted to go to town...get some iced tea (Arizona in the can.....found at CVS), go to JoAnn Fabrics to get something for a studio project, and go to Big Lots. Cool. So that is what we did. I did add in one more stop to the morning activities. We swung by the rescue mission to drop off another car load of stuff from the trailer. Todd was very quiet after we emptied the car at the rescue mission. I know what he is going through....after all, each load that we take to donate is his mother and grandmothers lives packed into boxes...and being given away. I know how that feels.....I went through it after my grandmothers death...and here he is doing it for his grandmother and his mother after having lost them both within a years span. As hard as it was, I know that he is satisfied with what he's done...because not only will someone be able to be clothed or decorate their house or get gifts for someone that they can afford....but the money that they make is also going to a good cause. We came home and I had a super yummy salad....dang that salad dressing that I've been making (Grandma Near's Salad dressing) is soooo good! Todd has requested Taco's for dinner. So I pulled out a pack of ground turkey for that. What the birthday boy wants...the birthday boy gets I guess. :-)

My weight did come down a LITTLE today. But after eating chinese...oh yes and the birthday boys brownie with ice cream (fat free of course...Bryers, fat free double churned, now that stuff is GOOD) that we had when we got home, (It's gone...so I won't be tempted today) I'm not surprised.

I still can't find that pesky missing tea! Todd asked again if I'd found it. My last hope is that it somehow fell out of my purse and got pushed under the seat of the car (how, when the bag was INSIDE my purse....closed up...but I'll look).

I'm still full of long ago memories that our time away in Lancaster and at the Rennfest brought to the surface. Makes one Melancholy for times and people from the past. Wow...I just walked back to my computer and when it rains it pours memories. While I was away, I was up front talking to the girls that I work with. Somehow the subject came up on mice.....and I told them the story about how I had mice lunge at me and the time my friend was coming over...and there was a dead mouse stuck to the bottom of the sofa (unbeknownst to me...although I did have an inkling that there was a dead mouse SOMEWHERE). I told them how my friend thought it was my baking that smelled so badly. Oh my......

Hmmm...tis about 3PM...should I have my mid-afternoon snack of grapes now?

Learning as I go

I made an interesting discovery about myself tonight. We were eating out at our favorite Chinese restaurant....the portions are HUGE. AND of course my fav meal is not the healthiest option. Well, when I ordered I asked for a to-go box to be brought immediately. They didn't...so when the food was delievered I asked again..and he brought it right away. I put half of my food in the box and closed it up. Out of sight...maybe not out of mind...but away and I didn't eat it. Well, I admit that I was sitting there going...I could still eat it....and I said something to myself that really made sense. I said to myself, "Yes, this meal is heavenly...but there is no reason to overeat it....because if I wanted to, I could come back next week, or tomorrow, or heck in an hour and get the same thing" It really nailed me. Yes, when I was away this past weekend, I did eat some stuff that I normally wouldn't have....however I had made that decision because it was 'special' things that I don't or can't get often! Shoefly pie....I can only get the kind I like in Lancaster (I don't like the ones that the local bakery makes) So that was a healthy decision...but chinese at the local place...I can get that any old time. Does any of that make sense????





Found a reallly cool quote...it's actually from one of the contestants on the Biggest Loser from this season. It is in reference to questions that are asked her about if she ever got to eat 'good' food. " Well first let me say ALL the food is good. Once you detox your body of all the chips, soda, french fries, cup cakes, you will enjoy fish and chicken and vegtables. Give "good" food a chance. I promise it won't let you down."

The water is a huge thing. I ate healthy yesterday...which I do know contributed. However, I think the biggest factor was the water. I actually drank a healthy amount of water. AND...3 of the 5 pounds that I gained while we were gone is gone! Yes, three pounds.....in one day. So, that just proves that I was retaining some mad water weight.

Todd has been battling a sore shoulder/neck for the last few days. So I'm praying for him to be healed.

I haven't exercised today...however I plan on getting out on my bike after I get off work. I should be getting off work at about 3PM today.

This weight loss thing is still a topic of conversation that is very near and dear to my heart. I truely am blessed with an interest in this subject. I don't proclaim to be an expert....but I'm very interested in the subject.

Wow.....I was just busy for a bit...ok, like an hour (ok ok ok, I was talking with co-workers for part of that time) and in that hour, I've developed a sinus pressure/headache. Dang...that is NOT fun!

Nothing seems Equal

Woah doggie! It's sickening how fast weight comes on! ANd equally sickening to think about how long it takes to eradicate that same amount of weight. It is definitely NOT equal! AT all! I will say that my 4-5 pound gain (yikes, that hurts to actually write it out...but yes, the scales are showing me about 4.5 pounds up after our little trip!!!). But, admittedly, I allowed myself to dehydrate while we were travelling. I didn't even drink HALF....ok, even a fourth of what I normally drink! So I'm sure that a good portion of that gain is water retention! I enjoyed my time away...and the food I ate, the weight gain was very worth it for the pleasure received during the trip.

Meanwhile, I'm back and raring to get back to eating healthy! I spent some time in the kitchen today cleaning, cutting, slicing and dicing all my fruits and veggies that I bought. So I'm ready for the week. :-) Then I had a extra yummy salad. I've been making a fabulous dressing. It's reminicent of a french dressing...but is very similar to a vinagrette. Go figure. All I know is that this stuff is good enough to go and simply eat a spoonful of it...without the salad! :-)

I think I'm going crazy. We bought some really cool tea at the REnn Fest at one of the shops. I SAW the lady put them in the bag. I immediately tied the bag shut and put it into my backpack. I opened it up today and only one tea was there. Go figure? Poor Todd.

We were talking at the rennfest. Yesterday was only the second time that Todd and I have visited the Renn fest by ourselves out of the eight total times we have visited the rennfest since we've been a couple. It was enjoyable to be with my beloved though. :-) However, it did bring back lots of memories of these other visits and those friends. Bittersweet memories in some cases. Ahhh...water from the "caves of aquafina"...and Anne of Boelyn blatantly checking out the men. :-)

This morning I got myself up and out of bed and exercised. After that, we started talking and decided to go hiking in the woods. We went over to our property. We filled our water jugs, I loaded the old car with more of the stuff that we are donating to the rescue mission (will this cleaning out process EVER be over) and then we took off through the woods. We walked our property line first....and then mosied back through the other property (which we have permission to hike one by the owner). It was very rough going as the paths haven't been attended to in at least 10-15 years. We had our backpacks on and we picked up stones when we got to the river. I picked up small stones to use to build a fireplace in my dollhouse that I am redoing (the dollhouse that my grandfather built for me back in the 70's....the log cabin) and Todd picked up big smooth ones to build a sound diffuser for the studio...sounds interesting. We loaded our backpacks.....nice and heavy and started back up the hill and over the terrain. It was a pretty good workout!!!

Todd's Birthday Trip

Well, our trip is over. We did what we had planned to do. We went to Lancaster and we also went to the Maryland Rennassaince Festival. We had a great time! In Lancaster we were able to go to all the places that we love to visit. I did splurge and eat a piece of Shoefly Pie. It was soooooo heavenly! Utterly orgasmic it tasted so dang good. :-) It is truely amazing how good food tastes when you are not constantly shovelling it down your throat! Today we went to the Rennfest. It was great. The weather was wonderful! We usually like to go to the renn fest in cooler weather, and at first I was dissapointed that it was so warm...but it turned out to be very nice. Lots of walking..and it was so crowded that at some of the stages, it was standing room only....and we stood. :-)

Food wise, I would call our trip a bit of a binge. Not that I ate all that horribly...but I made more unhealthy choices. I got those 'bad' foods that I sometimes like out of my system. Yes, I had french fries for the first time in MONTHS...probably years! This weekend...a very small order of them! My shoefly pie....oh yes, and one day we stopped at Bob Evens for breakfast (it was on the way to where we were going) and I had the cinnamon cream pancakes....heavenly! But, healthy food is back! I enjoyed my 'binge' (if I can call it that)...but my body is really craving the healthy stuff. :-)

Two steps forward I take .......

I just want to start singing Paula Abdul....Two steps forward, I take two steps back....... Yes, that's how I feel. I had an incredible loss last week...and a 2 pound gain this week! I know that I'm directly responsible for some of it. However, I will say that the ick is right around the corner and that causes water retention..and thereby weight gain. But I'll be brutally honest and admit that I caused some of the weight gain this week! While i didn't eat too terribly, I didn't eat too well. AND my exercise just kinda went right down the toilet. ZILCH! I'd like to be able to say without a shadow of a doubt that I'm focused and ready to face this week and conquer this battle...but Todd and I have some time off of work and we are goign to be doign a bit of travelling. OUCH. That doesn't bode well for eating....or exercising! I wasn't able to get us a hotel with an indoor pool (and the outdoor pool isn't goign to help much now) but at least it does have a fitness center. I just need to be religious and use it!!!

Saw a quote that I liked the other day. "Weight loss is not a destination....it's a journey" How true!

What's up with my motivation and or body! This week I've struggled again! ArrgghH!

I'm trying to drink my water today. I dind't drink halfways near enough water yesterday and I know I was shy on Saturday also. That's not cool. I've done pretty good...but I can tell that I hadn't drank enough the last few days.....because I've been in the bathroom constantly! Oh well!

This morning my weight was showing me up some. But, with the water thing...and some other things that I've got moving in the right direction, I may be able to squeak out a maintain! Oh I hope I hope I hope!

LOSS

Lost 4.6 pounds last night at my weigh in (ok, technically I lost them throughout this past week...but offically weighed in last night). That means I recouped my 2 pound gain from last week...plus some! I'm pretty tickled with it! I am not allowing myself to relax though. Because once I let down my guard, I'll stop losing! I so need to get to goal...at least my weight watchers goal (the highest weight I can be and maintain to be lifetime....in order to stop paying). This morning, the scales showed me down even further..which is totally awesome.

It seemed like for so long I was just sitting dead in the water. Now it seems as if my body is actually willing to lose the weight (if I do my part...before I could do my part and the weight wasn't dropping). SO I'm planning on running with it!

Like I feared, the scales were up a bit today. Not in panic mode..but I did count my points religiously. I also got up and did a short workout this morning.....notice I said short. It was only 20 minutes. So, here I am tonight...riding the exercise bike. Although, I've discovered that riding the bike and playing on the computer at the same time really makes the time fly by! It's awesome. If I'm sitting watching tv then I'm very cognizant of the fact. Reading is a bit better...but I'm still cognizant of how much time is passing.....each page turn is a bit more time passing! I know roughly how many pages I need to read to 'pass the time". Sooooo to my delight...even though I have the computer clock, the time just flies by without me really being aware!

So, I'm really workking on it today...I'm deterined to get this weight off!

Todd mentioned starting a family sometime soon. I want to get this weight off first though!!!!!!!

Tired by happy

I'm way too tired to write right now. Yesterday was a LONG day...started at 6AM...ended at 2AM this morning.....

BUT, as for today my weight is my all time low 185.8. I splurged a little today...so I"m hoping that my weight stays the same!

The addiction thing is so true. On monday night, Todd and I went out to eat dinner. We were at a buffet/salad bar. I am usually able to stay away from the dessert bar, or at least manage it with healthy choices. Well, after my week I was just plain and simple disgusted. My weight jumped up...and wouldn't go back down...no matter what I did! So Monday night rolls around and my mentality was that, "heck, if the scales are gonna show an increase, I may as well at least eat something that I'll enjoy at lesat once!" So I hit the dessert bar. I got a small piece of cake! IT was scrumptious! Absolutely delicious! I sat at the table and pondered...and pondered! It was so dang good that I had to head back for me! I got a total of two more pieces. Oh yes, and the pudding, and the icecream! On the way home, todd and I talked about it and I realized that yes, That was totally a sign of addiction. I ate that first piece of cake and it was soooooo good. I finished the cake and that feeling of satisfaction wasn't there any longer. I wanted to feel that again...so I got another piece of cake. And another. BUT, what I realized.....that 'high' only came wiht the first few bites of the cake. I really didn't totally enjoy the second and third pieces of the cake! It was only that initial high that tasted good....yet I strived to get that feeling again and again and again! If that's not an addiction, then what is?

Today I had mom check my blood sugar levels and my blood pressure. Things are all in line! I'm relieved about that!

I was up a bit at my weigh in...but it's all good! We learn from the rough times. Chalk up another lesson learned for me! :-)

Addiction

You know...food is really an addiction. Todd and I were leaving the gym and making our usual comment about how it seems like all of the Gold's Gyms that we go have a McDonald's right near it (next door this morning). Todd was like, "Do you want to go get a breakfast sandwhich" . He was totally joking! I answered of course with a negative. BUt then I commented about how it would taste good....but then I'd feel miserable after eating that junk. I'm totally addicted to the taste of food. We actually talked about how the addiction is the taste.....the high, while the feelings that you get after you eat poorly would be the crash...the let down....the withdrawl. Hmmmm...that really didn't clearly state what we talked about..but heck, at least the general idea is there.

I've been struggling the last few days. I've eaten my flex points...which for me, just doesn't seem to work! ARRGGHHH Why am I 'blessed' with a body that doesn't allow me to eat my flex points if I want to lose?????

Got a nice long bike ride in this morning! It felt really good! That on top of the gym yesterday!

Of course, the scales were up! I think a big part of that is the hot dogs we had last night. I had fat free ones for myself...however sodium city. And I did drink my 64 ounces yesterday...but it was done by the time I got home. I was way too relaxed in the evening. We were laying in bed watching the tv and I was dying of thirst! I finally got up and got a drink and downed 16 ounces in like two minutes. And you know that they say that if you get to the point where you are actually thirsty, it's too late, you are dehyrdated! So I think that's a huge factor in that!

We'll see how it goes tomorrow!

Special Investigative Report on CNN

I've been on top of everything the last few days. It's really neat to see how much better I feel. I've decided to go to a meeting tonight rather than tomorrow. I do know that the scales will probably show me up for a few various reasons. But I'm ok with that. Especially since I know that those reasons will right themselves and all will be ok.

This weekend we stumbled upon a show on CNN...a special investigation report by Sanjay Gupta. It was called Fed Up: America's Killer diet. VERY good show. Some of the points, facts and statistics were quite interesting of note.... (I will put my thoughts and additions in italics.)

1. There are a few doctors/scientists out there that feel that depression can be linked to the foods we eat. Namely the fats that we are eating. They are saying that we need the different kinds of fats in our diet...but in a healthy proportion. In the last so many years (20 or so) the numbers are no longer porportionate...one type of fat has just skyrocketed. The doctors/scientists are saying that this imbalance could be causing the upsurgance of depression. Now, my thoughts on the depression thing. I think that that could seriously be a huge factor. But I also think that the eating habits of America is so out of whack that peoples bodies are screaming. They are not getting enough nutrients, which I think is causing some of these problems. I know that Todd used to hardly ever eat veggies and fruits. He was depressed a good bit of the time. I started not really forcing him to eat fruits and veggies but having them for dinner and simply serving them to him...leaving it up to him if he was goign to eat them. The first thing...it seemed to help eliminate some of the 'down' days. AND two, if I don't have them with a meal he asks where they are, because he misses them.

2. Speaking of fruits and veggies. We all know that the daily recommended amount of fruits and veggies for a person a day is 5 servings. Sadly enough, if every American were to eat their recommended allotment, we wouldn't have enough fruits and veggies in America to meet the demand! Doesn't this just make you want to scream. What is even worse than the fact that we dont' have enough.....in current America we are throwing unused fruits and veggies away at an alarming rate! I'd love to know a statistic on how many Americans are actually eating a healthy amount of fruits and veggies!
Along with this, they also talked about how corn and soybeans are the biggest agriculture item out there, with millions in govement funding going to these farms. Yet this year was the first that they are expanding funding and subsidies to go to farmers of other things such as apples, and other veggies. Yet, the funding is still totally disproportionate! Why are corn and soybeans such a big deal......the oils that they can get from them!

3. They did a study. They told people that they would give them free wings to eat if they filled out a survey. They had two groups at two different tables/areas. One group had the wait staff taking away the bones from the wings as soon as they participants were done. The other group simply piled the picked bones in front of them...and the wait staff didn't remove them. The study was to see if a person ate more if they could actually see the results of how much they ate...versus the person that ate and had the results/bones removed so that they couldn't see how much they had eaten, they only had to rely on their memory and their stomachs. After it was over they counted the bones and weighed them. They found that the people that had the bones removed so that they could not SEE how much they had already eaten ate up to 50% more than the people that had their bones in front of them as a physical reminder of what they had already eaten. They also referred to a test with popcorn at the movies.....testing portion sizes.....and the kicker of that one...the people ate the popcorn like mad......and it was STALE! This doesn't really surprise me....but it was neat to see the results of actual studies.

4. The average kid is eating up to three pounds of sugar a week! Three pounds!

5. They had a near perfect study case of what America's diet is doing to people. They had a kid that grew up in Jamaica. He was thin, fit and a healthy boy when he moved to America with his family. Within 6 months of living in America, he had put on 30 pounds. A trip to the doctors office showed that he had developed high cholesterol, high blood pressure and was borderline type II diabetes. He was roughly 10 or 11 years old. His mother did what needed to be done. She learned about healthy nutrition and how to eat properly and immediately changed the eating habits for her family. The boy has lost 15 pounds and his numbers and health has dropped back out of the danger zone. They asked what was the difference, whey this happened. The kid and his mother talked about how there are so many tempting choices, tempting in taste and packaging. And the tempting choices were so 'easy'. They were the convenience foods. The sweets and everything else. They fell into the average American diet quickly and easily! And the results were swift and fast. 6 months??? And this kids life was turned around and could have been disastrous if left to go. Wow amazing because that is what we are doing to our children day in and day out. Let alone what we are doing to the adults and teens and elderly! 

6. They had a cook on...who also happened to be the editor (or some such title) with Cooks Illustrated Magazine (mom's fav!). He talked about how Americans have forgotten what it is to actually cook from scratch. In in forgetting about cooking from scratch, our taste buds have gone catawumpus and we have learned to prefer the taste of prepackaged, unnatural foods. He stated that the foods solely from scratch have a more subtle taste...which is not what the average person prefers now. How sad is that? I'm proud to announce that Todd and i actually prefer the meals from scratch! But it is correct, the taste is phenomenally different. 

7. Twinkies. They used twinkies as an example. They talked about how years and years ago, twinkies were made with the good old stand by ingredients, eggs, flour, sugar, milk. Then they read the ingredients of the current twinkie. Very few things that were recognizable. Some items were changed for cost (high fructose corn syrup) but many were changed for preservative factors! I admit to being guilty of still buying some prepackaged items. I know it and I'm slowly trying to change my lifestyle to eradicate them from my life. But this is something that I've lived with for a while. I started noticing that the homemade things last for only days..while the prepackaged (full of preservatives) foods last for weeks! Bread! If you make your own, it lasts only 2-3 days before it starts tasting stale yet I can buy bread in the store and it will last a week or two at my house (and who knows when it was actually baked even before I got it!) Jellies. Homemade jelly goes bad in the fridge within a month or so. Yet good old smuckers (and don't get me wrong...I grew up on smuckers and LOVED it) will last for at least 6 months before there is any problem! I can go on and on. This is my own personal soapbox!

8. Changing the contents of food and selling healthier options. Sounds great! They have reported that the public clamors for it....yet refuses to buy it when the companies do it. I do probably have to agree. However I do know that these 100 cal packs and such items are seemingly flying off the shelves. Could there be a turn, a shift in America's thinking????

So.....all this was quite interesting. We tivo'd it and I may watch it again...the information was just phenomenal! Once again, while I was watching, I felt it again. I have had a calling. I've felt it a few times here and there. Last night was another strong tugging. I really do feel as if my next calling in life is to somehow help others with their obesity problems...or nutrition problems if I want to be nice about how I put it. I know I've been saying things like, "Oh I want to get to my goal weight before I do something" and things like that. However, I need to be looking into options NOW!

Food for thought

Nope..I haven't given up! Even though I didn't write yesterday! Still simply frustrated with myself. I'll be the first to admit that I will eat something that I really don't want...and then I want to slap myself on the forehead saying "What in the world was I thinking???" It brings to the forefront....why do i eat stuff that I don't particularly like or want? I should be able to take a bite of something and say...'hmm...not good, its not worth it." But instead, I'll take a bite of something and say instead....'hmmm not the greatest...not good...but I'm going to shovel it all in anyway'. Why is that? I enjoy food....I enjoy GOOD food. So why do I eat something that is substandard?

Frustrated!

I'm frustrated today. The scales actually showed me up even higher than yesterday! What the heck???? I mean, I ate good yesterday! And that's what I get? The only thing I can think of....I finished my water early..and for some reason stopped drinking instead of continuing through out the evening. I know part of it was that I sat down to dinner and realized that I forgot to get a glass of water. I was just plain too darn lazy to get up and get it! Then the same thing at the computer later. I just didn't feel like getting up to go get it! So that probably hurt me!

I did however exercise for 40 minutes yesterday. I went with the step aerobics. Today I did about 45-50 minutes. Kicked my butt today. I really pushed it hard!

I've changed my mind three times on what I'm going to have for lunch. This is terrible! I've whited out my lunch plans three times now in my journal! I've got to make up my mind!!!!!!! Ok...I think I settled on what I'm going to have!!!!!

Cookies??????

Made cookies last night. For me, it's not really the finished cookie that is the tempting thing. For me, it's the cookie dough! Yeah, I know! Why in the world did I make cookies then? I made them because we haven't heard from Todd's uncle since shortly after his grandmothers death. We have a few things that we've found that is his and went to send them to him. Walnut/Icebox cookies are his favorite....so I thought I would make a batch to send along as a goodwill gesture. I had way too much cookie dough last night! :-)

I did have one cookie this morning with my breakfast (just to make sure they tasted ok). I'm done with them now! (It's actually easier to say that...because I'm not a big fan of walnuts!)

Weight is still up! TOM finally arrived so hopefully the weight will right itself this time! Crazy...I don't usually suffer from PMS, but this month was a killer!

I've got my eating plan laid out for today. It should be a pretty easy one to stick with! Hopefully the munchie stage is totally past! :-) Planning on doing step aerobics today. That's always fun. Of course it's nice outside...maybe I should go for a jog on the battlefield instead. Hmmmmm....decisions decisions decisions.

Success

Ok, maybe not a scaled success...but a success nonetheless. I ate lunch today. It was quite yummy, I had a salad and some applesauce. When I was done I was in the kitchen putting my dishes in the dishwasher and getting my grapes (midafternoon snack) ready to go to work. I was trying to decide in my head which 100 cal pack that I was going to eat. I hadn't planned on eating a 100 cal pack, however I WANTED one! I was sure I was still hungry! I don't know what caused me to do it, but I stepped back from the situation and really thought about how I felt at that moment and I decided that I wasn't really hungry. I decided that if I wanted one later, then that would be ok...but at that time, I didn't really need one! HUGE victory!

Now I'm at work......cramps have hit! MISERABLE! I rarely get cramps so I'm not happy! (like I'd be any happier if I get them regularly either!) HOpefully that isn't one of the things that is changing in my body. I usually only get cramps every couple months....luckily not every month. BUT, in the last few months, my cycle has been all whacked out and changing. ( A few months ago my cycle shortened....it's clockwork still...but just 4 days shorter! SHORTER...why couldn't it have gone longer...further apart!)