Friday, December 23, 2016

Change


Twas the night before Christmas (before Christmas Eve) and all through the house, the smell of cookies wafted!

Ok, that's not how it goes....but sometimes that's what I feel this world is.  I feel like I am walking through a world of temptation.  I feel like every which way I turn I am accosted with super yummy things that are just HORRIBLE for my weight loss efforts.  Notice I didn't just say horrible. Because in the grand scheme of things a Reeces Cup, or a cookie or a serving of Ben and Jerry's ice cream is not a horrible thing.  It's horrible for ME because I'm out of control.

There, I said it.  I'm out of control. Or rather I've been out of control!  (I can't say that I'm in control yet...but I had a realization this morning and maybe...just maybe I'm regaining control!)

I make grand plans to 'clean it up' and vow to do it....but then I get to work and a customer brings in cookies.  Well of course I have to have a cookie....or three  or four.  I am just getting over the cookie frenzy when a coworker gives me a Christmas bag....with Reece's Cups.  Well I just 'had' to eat them didn't I?   Now, it doesn't matter that there were five cups and I ate them in one day....I was showing appreciation for the thoughtful gift right?  A tin of popcorn?  A box of candy?  Yeah, people bring their bankers gifts sometimes (the regular customers that we see on a daily basis do at least) and I have been imbibing!  

But lets be honest.  It just hasn't been the work food.  I've bought a pint of Ben and Jerry's Ice cream at least once a week....ok, and for a while it was more often.  A pint would last two nights (ha once or twice only one night) and then when I was out I would go pick up another pint!   Talk about the cost of obesity. (my last blog post...and since I can't do links here.....http://mfclingan.blogspot.com/2016/12/the-cost-of-obesity.html)....there is roughly 1000 calories in a pint of that delicious stuff....and it's $4.19 at the grocery store!  

It's just not good.   I've been consciously trying to make better choices....but it's just not good.

Add that to the fact that last night I woke up with a HUGE cramp in my foot.  Oh my word it was HORRIBLE!  I couldn't get it to ease up.  I couldn't move!  HORRIBLE!   Eventually it died down after what seemed like hours, but in reality was probably only minutes.  It wasn't until the light of day that I realized what is happening.  Dehydration!  I usually only get cramps in my legs/feet when I'm dehydrated!  And let me tell you.....the half bottle of water I drank yesterday is NOT enough!  Yeah, I only drank a half bottle of water yesterday.  Ok, maybe a full bottle.....16 ounces at most!   I have to be quite dehydrated!   And upon further thought, maybe that's why my head is kicking up a storm!

So what was the realization that I had this morning????  Cookies....mom made the comment that she should have me make some more pecan tassies because she only has a dozen to sell at the market.  I immediately thought about the fact that I only had a few tassies the day that I made them and then I"ve had no more as she has been selling them.  Ohhh and the same thing with the date dainties that I made that same day.  I was sad for a split second....and then an incredible thing happened.   I realized that I didn't really want any more of those cookies.  I had had my taste and I was good!  Now that's not to say that if I would happen to make them that I wouldn't eat one or two....but honestly I am ok without them!  (And I doubt I will make them as her last market before Christmas is tomorrow and I work today!)

I'm not making any dramatic declarations yet.  But I will say that I'm tired of being 'over stuffed' with food and feeling miserable.  I'm ready for a change!