Duldrums

I went running today.   I cut it short...it was 37° and starting to rain.   Not a good combination.   I can handle one or the other..:not both.   Besides, time was running out.   It wasn't a spectacular run but it wasn't a bad one.

The biggest thing today is that I just feel blah. I don't know why.  I haven't felt this way in a very long time.  I don't like it!!

Even crazier?  Usually running throws me into a good 'high'

Oh well....

My 2017 in 2017 goal....and more specifically my goal for march to not run any deficit in my mileage update.

I am sitting at 119.07 miles (not including my 2.14 run miles from this morning).  That means I need 52.97 miles in 8 days.   That is 6.62 miles a day.   It's supposed to be nice this weekend and we are planning on having the bikes out....so maybe....just maybe!!!! It will be close I think!!!!

And looking at the march goal page we may as well talk about the other goals right now....

20 running miles.    The snow messed me up for sure!!  (Yes that's an excuse!). I am at 13.29 miles.   I have to run 6.71 miles to make that goal. Yeah next week there is only one day of the week that I can run on the morning....that could put a damper on meeting that 20 miles...because I am so not ready to run a 6.71 mile run!!!!!

The 1800 or less calories a day...there were a few days that I was right at 1800 calories and only 4 days I went totally over!!!!  Not a win but not a total loss!!!

Bad luck or no luck

Moving along chronologically....(weekly weigh results at the end of the post)....

If I didn't have bad luck....I'd have no luck at all!!!   After a large chunk of change spent on my car in December and January...and one or two other financial blows in January I struggled to pull myself out of the financial mess!  Last weekend  I made the comment that this paycheck SHOULD put me back on track...no savings left but no outstanding bills/debt!!!  Which meant let the savings begin!!!

On Monday night I was driving down the interstate and kabaam, loudest I've ever heard a rock hit....and of course my windshield now has not one...not two...not three...but four spots of damage!!  Yes I have comprehensive coverage but still...a deductible is still hard to cover when you make what I make (Peanuts would be an increase of pay. Let me just say...I live with my parents because I can't afford an apartment on my own!).  Grrrrr!

Then Tuesday morning I went to use my Aftershokz headphones (mine are not pink...I have plain black ones)

 

And they won't snyc with my phone.   Really?????   The last time I used them I noticed that one of the sides was floppy..that the plastic casing was cracked but they still worked.  In the interim of noticing that and Tuesday morning, I reset my phone back to factory settings and wiped everything clean.   After the reset, my Fitbit connected via Bluetooth just fine...but my headphones no longer will sync!    Grrrr. I don't have the money for new headphones!!!    I will research and see if there is anything else I can do (I've already done the basic things that they recommend!) but I fear with the crack/floppy arm that they have reached the end of their life.

So then.....

I woke up at 5am and I so didn't want to run.  (I wouldn't have gone out until 7 anyway) So I went back to sleep and woke up at 7.   I still didn't want to go but knew I needed to!   So I tried to find an excuse in the weather.  Because I was NOT running if the weather was miserable.  I even told myself I wouldn't run if it was under 40°.  And I even chuckled because I just knew it wouldn't be over 40°.   Boy was I wrong!  So I went out!   It wasn't a fast run....my head started hurting shortly into the run.....my foot ached...but I did it!!

So yes...I did run on Tuesday morning...with wired ear buds.   (Yuck...running with wires again after a few years of freedom....yuck!   And earbuds...those darn things never stay in my ears!!!! Yuck!)

So the foot ache?   My planters fasciitis has been kicking a bit lately....and also the tarsal nerve.   The plantar hurt while I ran...the tarsal nerve started when I got home.  

See...no luck at all!!

Course that's not true....I lucked out when I met Jason!  

On Tuesday night Jason and I walked outside after work. The weather was delightful...a sweatshirt was all we needed and even that seemed warm while we were out walking.

Wednesday morning?   Back to cold.  What's up with this weather!!!!!

I weighed in for my weekly official date with the scales.  238.0.   Grrrr. That's up 1.2 from last week but down .8 from two weeks ago. 

The monthly ick is hanging out this week so that could have affected my weigh in....but let's be honest....my eating hasn't been stellar or late!!!  So let's just say it wasn't a good weigh in...but yet I was relieved at my weight!

So onward and upward. Or rather downward on the scales!!!!!

Boomerang weight

So the other day I talked about my two meals of Chinese and the fact that it was ok as long as it was only one day!  My last few weeks have not been the greatest.  I was at the top end of my caloric range for the last umpteen days!  Not off the rails but definitely not where I should be to be losing!!!!!  Just too much and poor options.  

 

I haven't looked too much at my miles since last week....half of the weekend my Fitbit was uncharged....and my charger wasn't anywhere near.  Oops!

Exercise for last week and this weekend....nearly non-existent!    

 

The whole week was pretty much a crazy week of just skimming and doing nothing to get myself to my goals.

So I was really nervous about stepping onto the scales for my unofficial weigh in this morning.   Very nervous.  I had teetered at 238 pounds for weeks...and last week got down to 236.  I was afraid I had gone right past 238 into the 240's!   Luckily it wasn't that bad.   I'm like a boomerang that is returning to 238.....that must be my current boomerang weight!   Shucks!   But I did it to myself!!!

We had a relaxed weekend.  We did some shopping, explored an old chapel and graveyard,

 

Went to some antique stores and an old mill....

 

And just relaxed together.

I saw this bumper sticker at one of the shops we went to...

 

 

I used to sign emails and blog posts by finishing off with 'think thin'. And that is so true.....

And then at another one I saw this...

How perfect since that is after all part of my blog title!!!

They both simply reminded me of where I want to go and what I have to do to get there!!!

Friday wrap up

I don't have any wise words of wisdom or any great epiphanies today. 

It was a ho hum week.  Thusly, I will bullet point this post!  

***I am ready for the snow and ice to be gone off the roads and sidewalks.  I'm ready to run!!!!   Yeah I could probably still go but I don't want to have to worry about slipping on he ice that is still hanging out!  Not worth breaking anything.   

***I have been hungry for Chinese for WEEKS!.   Yesterday I ended up eating Chinese food for lunch AND dinner.  And I had ice cream after dinner.  Yeah my calories were way high.  I'm not panicked about it.  I am trying to live....I am trying to figure out how to balance normal life with a healthy eating and healthy lifestyle.   That means that some days will be high calorie days.  The trick is making it just ONE calorie day and not a week of high calorie days...or a month of high calorie days!!!  That means today I have to keep my eating spot on!!

***I surprisingly have gotten more steps then I thought I would get this week.   Without the running and nice warm evening walks with Jason my steps just don't happen!  I only reached my step count goal on Tuesday the day of the snow.  This week has pretty much eaten up my big credit of steps that I built up with my bike rides, runs  and long hike of last week.   Luckily I'm still running a credit balance of 6.7 miles....but I will lose that quickly if I don't step it up!!!

***We have gone to the park a few times since the snow to feed the ducks, geese and swans.  I know that they are fine and will not starve and in fact are NOT starving. But it's cold and snowy (the sidewalks are still mostly snow and ice covered at the park) and I know that they are not getting as many visitors to the park to feed them and we show up with food and within minutes we have hundreds of water fowl surrounding us.   They are so anxious to get their fair share of food (or more food then the others cuz they are greedy) that they are brushing up against us like dogs and cats.  They are stepping on our feet and squawking when we try to move them off of us!  One goose was literally goosing Jason the other day!   Sadly I didn't get a picture!   It has been fun!!!!  We are so inundated with animals on these days that even the ducks were trying to eat out of our hands and getting close!  (The mallards are typically very skittish and while they come out of the water they don't get close to us and the wood ducks usually don't come out of the water usually).  Let me tell you....$7 for 50 pounds of cracked corn is a cheap investment in lots of fun!!!!  (On Tuesday we dropped about 20 pounds of cracked corn...probably only 10 pounds yesterday.....normally on warmer days we go through a lot less!!!!). Oh and the side benefit of feeding the animals?   We are walking at the park!!!

*** My water consumption is spotty...some days I nail it, others I am lucky to finish one bottle.   I need to get on top of that!!

The weekend is just about here!  Hopefully the weather will be clear enough for a nice long hike!   And I am crossing my fingers that winter is on it's way out and that I can enjoy those nice summer night walks with Jason, balmy bike rides, and all the warmth!!!!!!

Weigh in day

For some reason I was dreading weighing myself today. I don't know why.   It's not as if I was horrible.   I didn't manage to keep myself at the low end of my caloric target (1200) but I managed to stay within the range, allbeit at the top end of that target range.  I hadn't drank near enough water though.....but I didn't think of that until after the facts. So I don't know why I was nervous...but I was!

Regardless, I stepped on the scales.   Woohoo.  236.8.  So that's two down from my official weigh in last week and 1 down from my weight every other day last week.   I'll take it!!

Running this week....not really happening.   I'm not risking life and limb to run on sidewalks, roads and alleys that are still snowy/icy.   

Yes we got snow yesterday...about 8 inches give or take.   I was out for about two hours shoveling, cleaning off cars and playing in the snow.  I was active the whole time but my Fitbit was only registering 4000 steps when I came in.  Uhhh after two constant hours of movement.    I think not!    So apparently shoveling and car cleaning falls into the realm of activities that my Fitbit doesn't detect enough movement.    Regardless....I moved the rest of the day and still registered over 11k steps. 

 

Yes...my snowman was wearing sunglasses and a bikini! 

I've been thinking a lot lately about excuses.  Some people have an excuse for everything in their life and they never accept responsibility for anything. Annoying as all get out!!).  These people complain all the time about their life and how horrible it is...but always have an excuse as to why they can't change.  They just wallow in their self pity and will never change for the better .  Some people take control of most things but just come up with excuses for the biggies.   These people can sometimes change but if they do it's by luck and/or takes forever.    And thirdly, there are people that say 'no excuses'.  They own up to their problems and roadblocks in life and if something is physically /emotionally/financially/ etc impossible they find a work around and complete the task anyway.   These people see change.   And can I dare I say happiness?

Success in this journey (and life) is taking no excuses.   Stop saying 'these are the cards I've been dealt' and kick this cards to the curb.   Medical conditions?   Nope not valid.  Not at all!!!  I've seen people with terrible mental disorders lead productive lives....I've seen people with horrible physical disformaties  compete in bike races .....medical conditions are  not valid!!!  Time constraints?   Unconvenience but definitely navigable!!  They are simply excuses.   If you want something bad enough you will find a way!!!!

I want to be thin.....it's time to find a way!!!!

Where is spring??

The snow of Friday never amounted to much.   A dusting in the ground and a bit of slush on the side roads.  It didn't delay or affect anything....obviously not my run.   I made the comment that 'ok we had a robin snow....spring is here'.  I guess I was wrong.

So. For my running.  This week  I should  run on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday mornings (according to what works best with my work schedule).   I'm not quite sure that is going to happen though.   Why????

 

Yeah, that doesn't look good.  The arrow is where I live.  So it could be worse I guess."

So who knows what this will do to my runs and my mileage goals for the month and year!

The weekend was cold so we headed down into D.C. And visited Madame Toussauds Wax Museum.   

 

 

We also made wax hands.....

 

Which we played with at home later...

 

 

And we got even sillier as we texted pictures back and forth.

After we left the museum we headed across town for a walk.   You see, there was a store we wanted to visit so even though it was a few miles we decided to walk there!   We saw lots of pretty buildings and churches!!!

 

 

 And then we walked about another metro station and went home.   Lots of steps.

I'm not sure what the week will bring....

 

......but hey, if it's really snowy I will at least get a fair amount of exercise in with all the shoveling!!!!!

Comedic Horror

Lots of little things to say today....and some questions to answer....but first, today's run!!!

It was snowing....but that didn't deter me.   I was planning to run and a little snow wasn't going to keep me from it!!!

I headed out with a smile on my face...

 

It was a run that transcended the lines between comedy and horror.

As I said , it was snowing.  So I layered up and headed out.  Almost immediately I noticed that it must have rained for a while before it turned to snow (very heavy wet snow) because there was a ton of puddles.  Not a problem, I sidestepped them and knew that when I invariably stepped in a puddle that my feet usually don't get too wet.   But then about 1/4 of a mile from home I stepped into a puddle with my right foot.  And the right foot stayed pretty dry.   But the splash washed over my left foot and it was effectively soaked!!!!  All I could do was laugh at that point.   I kept running!!

About a half mile from home I started to feel that something wasn't right. And it was not  right with my pants!!!!  Yes, my britches!  I was wearing a pair of satiny feeling underlayer beneath my pants.  It felt like the satiny layer had slipped down.  I continued running and reached around and dug my hand into the back of my pants to grab the offending garmet.  But I just couldn't quite grasp it!  So I whipped off my gloves and with bare hands reached into the seat of my pants yet again....still running!   Once again I came up empty, but I could feel the pants slipping even further.  The waistband now felt like it was wrapped around my upper thighs.   I had to stop!   And what I found horrified me.....my under t layer was perfectly in place!   It was my outer layer!!!!!  I was literally losing my pants!!!!   What a sight that must have been!!!

I fixed my wardrobe malfunction and immediately started running!   I reached into my pockets and pulled out my gloves.  They were already wet and I had pulled them off so quickly that they were all twisted inside out.  It took me about a 1/4 mile to get them right side out and back on my hands.  And that pretty much wrapped up mile one!   

The snow continued to fall. Mile two was pretty uneventful...a few more puddles...and each time the water splashed my other foot.

Mile three is where it got ugly!!!   I was COLD!   The alleys and sidewalks were turning slushy and slick.  And my gloves and clothes were totally wet and my nose was running and I had no place to wipe my nose!  (Yeah I have a bunch of pair of cheap gloves that I just wipe my drippy nose on and then throw in the wash when I get home). I may have shed a tear or two during mile three.

Mile four....I was just numb.  It was uneventful....although I probably had snot bubbles because I still couldn't wipe my nose!!!

I only kick myself because I got home and saw that I was at 3.78 miles.  I went inside.   Now I wish I would have run around the block to push myself over 4!!!

 

The cheeks are much more rosy after the run!!!

My clothes were soaked the whole way through to the bottom layer.   My sweatshirt heavy and wet with moisture!!!  But I did it!!!

*******

My weight...I lamented on Wednesday that my weight had been 237.4 on Monday and Tuesday and had popped up a pound for my official weigh in on Wednesday.   Well what do you know, my weight on Thursday and Friday was back to the 237.4.   Isn't that nuts?????

*******

I occasionally pop in a graphics of my calories and nutrients into my blog.....something like this 

 

I was asked the other day where I got my graphics.   It is on the MyFitnessPal program....in the app on my phone.   At the bottom of the daily diary page there is a button that says nutrition....the charts are behind that button!

****

A few months ago someone asked how I post my blog posts from my phone.   I was using an old unsupported app. It was contankerous and I struggled with it and it was crashing a lot!   Well I wiped my phone clean this past week and of course lost that unsupported app.   I started searching and came across blog touch.   I tried the free version.....ad it seemed to work.  But they won't let you post on the free version (what a crock...what's the use of having a free version if you can't go the whole way through the process....I just figured the free would block features such as adding videos and links etc) I decided to go for it...and paid the $4.99 for the blog touch pro.   I can insert links (always pain on my old app) and pictures and all sorts of things.   I've posted with it twice not and it seems to be working (it better for a paid app!!)

 

*******

What about my 2017 in 2017 goals....and in particular my march goal to NOT fall further behind.  I am happy to say that I am happy to say that I am actually 16 miles AHEAD of where I need to be....thanks to two fabulous bike rides on Wednesday and Thursday!!!   We rode on the canal both days.   It was a bit windy!!!!  

 

 We also got off our bikes to investigate an abandoned building...the spring house was neat!!!!

 

And I saw my first daffodils of the season in bloom!!

 

My weight might not be moving fast...but I'm living a healthier life!!!!!

Bummer

Some days weight loss is frustrating!   Totally frustrating!!!!!!

When frustration sets in we come up against some choices.   Here are three major options.  One, we can throw up our hands and give up. Secondly we can continue going on the healthy path with no changes .    Thirdly we re-evaluate and move on.   

So I was looking forward to my weigh in today.   Let me lay out the daily weigh ins.

Last Wednesday... 238.4

Last Friday....236.8 (woohoo)

Monday....237.4

Tuesday....237.4

Yes I really wanted to see the 236.8 again this morning but I was happy knowing that I would most likely see 237.4...which would still be a loss!!!

I woke up thirsty in the middle of the night and this morning which worried me....(I drank a ton yesterday too...so I shouldn't have been thirsty. Historically when I'm thirsty my weight is up a bit...water retention I guess.).  

Regardless, I stepped onto the scale. Dang it....238.4!    Really a straight maintain??????  

Ok so I'm glad it's not a gain!   I will put that out there right away!  

What in the heavens is happening with this?????

Ok so those three options I spoke of earlier?   Number one, giving up?  Not a valid option.

So that leaves me with continuing my healthy choices and reevaluating.  And I plan on doing a combination of the two.

 

Not too bad calorie wise since I aim for between 1200-1800.

 

Looks really good when you add in the exercise.

But this breakdown showed me what needs to change.

 

My carbs need to be cut back.   As sad as that is.   More veggies and fruits...which doesn't upset me in the slightest!

Other than that...continue onward.

As for running, I did miss my run yesterday. I woke up and it was cold AND raining.   Cold I will do easily.   Rain I will do when it's not cold.   But the combination of the two for me was a no go!   I had no regrets but I will say that I was bummed to miss my run!!!!!

Practicing What I Preach

Not regrets eh?   Yes late last week I wrote a post about regrets.   It was stemmed from the fact that on Wednesday I had skipped my run and regretted it.....and from that I made the conclusion that I usually only regret NOT doing something.  I had also made a statement that my plan for three runs that week wasn't lost since I still had Saturday morning.  Well .....cue the opening music for Saturday morning ....

It was early Saturday morning (too early to be awake if truth be known!).   I talked to mom, folded the laundry that had dried overnight and watched and episode of 'Vikings'.   In my mind I had it worked out how my morning would proceed!  When it came time for me to gear up to run I did the natural thing.  I picked up my phone to check the weather.   That's important because I needed to know how to dress. Lots of layers or the oh so wonderful one teeshirt?  What was it to be?   It took a few seconds to load the weather and I just wanted to cry.    20° with a 'feels like/windchill' of 10°.  Brrrrrrrr.  I debated...but then said 'no regrets' and put on a few layers of clothes.

It was cold.   The cold went right through my gloves...for the first few minutes. But the act of running produces heat and magically I was pretty much ok temperature wise for the rest of the run!  Early into the run though I just knew that the victory would be in completing the base mileage that I had set in my head as my goal.  It just wasn't a 'magical' run where everything feels fantastic!

No fears...I got it done!!  And guess what....I felt great when it was over!  I was proud of myself when it was over.  I had absolutely no regrets!!!!

When I had left the house I hadn't heard anyone stirring so I left a note on the inside of the door saying, 'I am out running, be home and such and such time, if you leave do not lock me out!' .  When I arrived back home I found the piece of paper hanging on the outside of the door with a new note written on it....

It says Door is always locked to keep the rid raf out!   And signed management.

Yes, when I opened the door and pushed my way into the house he yelled out from the kitchen, saying 'Hello rif raf, I thought I locked the door!'  That's my dad!  (And the best part....he felt good enough to make the joke!!).  Hahaha dad!

Jason and I hiked over the weekend and although I was achy when we were done, it was fabulous to get out!!

This is some kind of old foundation along the Appalachian Trail.

And the first overlook we hiked too....

An icy spring 

And a later overlook the top of Hogback Mountain.

At one point when we were climbing to the top of Hogback Mountain I was seriously wondering how my run on Monday was going to go after the leg workout the hike was giving me.   But I was determined to run on Monday!

Cue the music for Monday morning........

Ahhh it was a bit nippy at 30° but there was absolutely no question in my mind that I was running.   Even when my parents invited me to breakfast...I declined the offer...I had a run to complete!!

I could feel the effects of the mountainous hike while I ran....and I didn't set any records for my pace...but 3.42 miles have been recorded!!!!!!!

No regrets

I planned to run three times this week.   With my schedule the most obvious and easy days to run were the days that I came in at 10 in the morning.  This past week that was Monday, Wednesday and Thursday.  No problem!   Monday came and I pulled on my running gear and hit the road.  Day one down.   Wednesday morning rolled around.  I checked the weather.  It was close to 60° but had a 30% chance of rain for the morning.  That wasn't bad odds!!!  I laced up my shoes and made it to the front door. My mom called out 'its rainy'.  I looked out the window at the wet roads and even though there was no precipitation falling from the skies, I retreated and chose not to run. My decision was in no way my mothers fault...I made the choice.  Me and me alone!  But an hour or so later when my mother looked out the window and announced that my brother was just getting back from his bike ride the regret started!

All day long when I saw that it was nice and that it didn't rain until the mid afternoon. I regretted it.  

On Thursday morning when I woke up to cold and high winds I regretted losing that nice warm run the day before.   The whole time I ran I regretted the loss of that fabulous running weather from Wednesday!

Now as for the three runs...I don't work Saturday so I should be able to make up the list run!  But I still regret losing Wednesday!!!!

Regrets.   As I ran on Thursday I was thinking about regrets.   And I started thinking about regrets in my life.

1.  I regret not leaving my marriage when it first fell apart....happiness could have come my way so many years earlier.
2. I regret not trying to lose the weight at a much much earlier age!
3. I regret not stopping the weight gain after I had lost all the weight!
4. I regret the fact that I was running consistently and I stopped and now I have to start at close to scratch!  (Ok not scratch because I can run a mile...but it's slooow....much slower than when I was running consistently!)
5. I regret not having kids.
6. I regret not putting my health as a priority for so many years.
7. I regret not pushing for a different career path!
8. I regret the fact that I did not run on Wednesday!!

Wow all of my major life regrets were from things I didn't do!!!!    I realized that I never regretted trying something!  My major regrets in life were for NOT doing something!!

The decision to 'not' do something was the catalyst for regret!     So that of course made me think about that runnin Wednesday.  Why had I stopped and given up?? Was I afraid of getting wet?   I've run in the rain before...in cold rain too!    Was I afraid of the cold?  Nope, I had run many runs in cold!!!!!   I just didn't because the rain was an excuse to be lazy.   And I regretted it!!!

Never once have I gone out running and said 'I regret that run!!!!   I shouldn't have gone!   I ALWAYS come back feeling like a million bucks!!   Maybe a bit sore but emotionally recharged and full of energy!    When I pound out a mile or two in some vicious weather I feel like a Viking warrior that has just completed a successful raid!!!!  Totally bad ass!!!!

I want to live a life of no regrets!!!!!   That means I have to do what I set out to do and stop doubting myself so much that I give up and stop!!!

Now for the nitty gritty......bullet point style...just because I can.

**My food is still not the greatest but that just gives me room for improvement right?  I am under that 1800 calorie goal that I set though!!!!

**As I mentioned I did run on Thursday.  I was actually very pleased with my run.  I was just about one minute faster per each mile!  I felt strong and would have gone further but I got a bit of a late start and didn't have the extra time!!!

**I'm drinking my water...some days it's the bare minimum of what I aim for (64 ounces) but I'm drinking!!!

**This morning my heel has bothered me.   Planters Fasciitis hurt.  Nooooo!!!  I do not want that planters fasciitis to read it's ugly head!  If I had KT tape with me I would be taping my foot.  I will be doing that tonight to try to nip this issue in the bud!! I will be freezing a water bottle and rolling my foot tonight too!!!  In the meantime I have a bottle of unfrozen water under my desk and I am standing and rolling my foot on that!!!

**I am planning a run tomorrow morning!   I've got some mileage to make for my running goal for March.  And we are hoping to hike this weekend also!!!

Let's roar it's march!!!

March  has arrived...and with it new ideas and goals....or rather challenges for myself!!!

First up...where do I stand on my plan to prop myself 2017 miles in 2017????

I ended January with a deficit of 47.93 miles.

I ended February with a deficit of 53.05 miles.

February would have been a lot worse had the weather not cleared up!   I lost a good portion of one week due to being sick.  But then the weather turned gorgeous....and jason and I got out and rode our bikes....and walked...and got active outside and the miles started adding up.   But still I ended up with a deficit.

So that makes a year to date deficit of 100.90 miles.   That's a lot of miles to recover!!!

I'm still not gravely concerned.   I know how many miles I'll get when the weather is nice.   February was looking really bad until the weather turned nice and in that week or so of nice weather I was dropping some nice mileage days (walking and bike combined).   In that week I managed 46.44 miles...which is almost 10 over what I had originally projected for my weekly needs!  I can still do this!!!!  Running three times a week will help because even though right now I'm only running 2.5 miles, I know that as I get back into it I will be pushing  that to 3, 4 and 5 miles at least for each run.  Well heck, if I run 5 miles I pretty much already have met my mileage goal for the day....and anything else is just icing on the cake (aka as working off that deficit!!) I also know that when the weather is nicer (and it's light later ) that jason and I spend a lot more of our evenings out walking and hiking (and probably this year biking)!  We have also talked about doing a through trip on the canal.   So if we do that In four days I would garner 184 plus miles. That would catch me up real quick!!!

So I'm not giving up on my 2017 in 2017 yet!

My weight.   Not the greatest but holding somewhat steady.   I was down 1.6 pounds for the month of February.   237.8 is where I'm at.   Now what I wanted ...I would have preferred more!   However, it wasn't a gain and it was a loss albeit a small one!    I'm trying to look on the bright side!!!

So that brings me to my Goals for March!!!

My 2017 in 2017 goal for March is to simply not add to the year to date deficit!!!  (172 miles!!)

Running .....I want to run at least 20 miles for the month. (The last two months I've managed only a few runs...and each month came in between 8 and 9 miles).

Weight......I'm going to say that I want to be into the next "decade".   I want to be under 230!!!

Food.....healthy options....stop or at least severely limit the junk (chips, fries, etc) aim to keep calories below 1800 calories each and every day....with the true goal of 1200!

Yup...I've got my work cut out for me I think!!!!

Is it Saturday yet???

Monday and now Tuesday....bring on Saturday!  Yes I seem to live for my weekends!!!!   (Who doesn't??)

This post is going to be a little of this and a little of that.... so buckle up.....

This last weekend was low key for us.   Jason has been fighting off a cold for the last week.   It hasn't gotten horrible but it was annoying for him.   He had said that he wanted to get outside and hike or something...but he was still feeling rough when the weekend rolled around and I put my foot down and said 'light activity' only!!!  (In fairness to him he didn't put up any resistance!).  We had to make a return to REI, we hit up some 'mini zoos' (aka pet stores), hit up two small museums (Fairfax Museum and the Fairfax Station Railroad Museum) and just took it easy!   

So no mad miles for me to help my 2017 in 2017 goal this past weeken.   Lots of thoughts on that goal though...maybe tomorrow's post if I have the words formulated in my mind by then!!!!

I did run yesterday morning.  It was surprisingly not a bad run.  I'm still 2-3 minutes slower than my lowest average pace...but as I lose weight and run more that will improve!   Consistency!!!

Eating....grrrr. Yesterday I went off the rails with my eating!!! Over 2 k calories....and if truth be known since Friday I have been up near 1800 calories.   I need to rein that in...badly!!! 

Water consumption....in actually doing pretty good.   I basically take a bottle of water to bed and I break my day into two hour increments and tell myself that I have to finish a bottle every two hours.  So right now I'm saying that my bottle has to be don't by 10....I will then refill it from the water cooler and my challenge is to finish that one by 12...so on and so forth!    Weekends I do pretty good because jason drinks a lot...and it's easy to remember to drink when someone else is drinking water which reminds me!!!

Weight...so far holding steady.  We will know tomorrow at my official weigh in!!!!

Push past it!!

You know...there is a total mental aspect of pushing yourself further, farther and harder.  Some days it's easy!  Some days it is just the most simplest thing in the world to push myself out of my comfort zone.   Some days though...it's difficult!

A few weeks ago I finally watched the documentary "From Fat to Finish Line".   It was a pretty good documentary.  (The link is to the trailer for the documentary.) it was inspiring and motivating and if you haven't seen it I would recommend it. I had heard about it a while back but it took me a while to actually get off my butt, find it and watch it!   There is a point when one of the runners is doing her second leg of the race and she starts to fall apart. There was apparently some medical issues too...but what caught my eye and what made me sit up straighter was how she was falling apart.   What I heard (and in fairness to her, it may have just been my impressions of what was happening) was her negative self talk.  I can't remember exactly what she said at this point but she was doubting all of the hard work that got her to where she was...simply because she was struggling.   For her it was not a 'push yourself kinda day.'   Maybe medically she couldn't go on...but I knew in my heart that when she started mumbling 'I cants' and the negativity that mentally she was through for a while!

I saw it happening to her and I knew....why?   Because I've been there so many times!   I have written so many times about my 'mini me'. The voice in my head that tells me I'm a loser, and that I'm not a runner, and that I should just quit!   I remember a run on the canal a few years ago that darn mini me was telling me all sorts of nastiness!   I was in tears!   And finally I just started screaming  out loud telling that darn mini me to shut up!!!  And I kept running.   It's happened over and over again....sometimes I win...sometimes I fail!

This past weekend I had a moment like that, it was the last day out on our bikes. I had already crashed my bike the day before and we were on a different trail that was even more  terrifying to me!   (Ironically I'm still more terrified of this trail even more than the trail that I did my face plant on!!). I was in front of Jason riding and that darn 'mini me' voice was just there screaming at me!!!!  I started to cry!  Not blubbering loud crying...just quiet tears of despair.   And then I thought about the documentary....and all the times I've let that darn mini me voice win.   And I said 'no'!!!

I was out of my comfort zone but I was going to come out the winner!!! And guess what....I did!!!  (Just a little bruised up at the end of the weekend!!!)

So I had my epiphany over the weekend that my health and fitness has to be fixed and I've worked hard this week!   I've run twice...and walked quite a few miles!  My food intake has been pretty good!   I'm out there working it!!!

Today while running I saw another sign that my fitness level had dropped drastically.   After exertion it is taking my heart rate longer to recover!   No worries...I'll regain that!!!

My run today I pushed myself out of my comfort zone.  I pushed myself to speed up.  Just random and frequent little bursts of speed.  'Light post to light post' and 'telephone pole to telephone pole' toe stuff.   But the real victory is that I would set my stopping point...but quite a few times I would talk myself into going further.  It's all self talk while I run.   'Oh come on Maryfran, you can make it to the tree, it's only 20 feet past the original goal'.  And I did it!!!!!   I'm sore now......but I did it!!!!

I've tried to walk more this week also!  It helped that the weather has been fantastic!!!!!!   It's fun to walk and feed the ducks!!!

Who Knew??

We had a long weekend and the weather was fabulous!!!  Spectacular actually!!!!  We headed south and vowed to enjoy every second!!!  And I will get to epiphanies and deep thoughts a bit later...first I need to talk about the weekend that makes these thoughts!!

We did enjoy the weather!!!!

We took our bikes and on Sunday we rode on the road near our hotel.  The scenery was fabulous!!!!  The hills were a bit of a challenge for me and I was breathing like a freight train!   However it felt good to be on my bike after a month or two!!!   

On Monday we decided to head out to the West Augusta Trail.   It was listed as a good beginner trail for a newbie.  The newbie would be me!!!

A newbie?  Yes....I've ridden my bike quite a bit but I have always ridden on the road or a quasi road (the C&O canal towpath).  Going off road would be a new thing for me.   I was nervous because I've watched some amazing videos of mountain bikers and the trails they do and how crazy the trails can get!   But I told jason a while back that I would give an easy mountain bike trail a hung ho go.  And yes, emphasis on the word EASY!!!

So he found this easy trail online!  I read the descriptions and thought it would be good for me.  The only problem?  We couldn't easily find a location for the trailhead!   Yeah, that's a bit of a problem!!!  We went to the visitor center in the nearest town to try to get clarification.  We got pointed in the right direction.  We knew the trail was in the George Washington National Forest so off we went (the weekend and holiday meant no answer when we called for directions!) 

We searched but we failed miserably to find the  trail. 

We found a cool lake though!!

And we saw some trails around the lake and decided to head out on them.  We could always turn around if we wanted!

The first mile or so was pretty easy!  I was hurting a bit because it had been a while since I rode a lot (exuding the day before which has already made my muscles sore) and it was an incline!  

And then it started to get rocky.  

I pushed forward across a bed or rocks.   It was definitely more technical than I was ready for on my first ride out.  Eventually it smoothed out a bit and we began to really climb!  (I climbed a bit and then walked up to the top!).  I climbed on my bike at the top and started the descent. The trail was gorgeous as we went down...a drop-off to one side and the hill going up the other side of the trail.

And then it was time for some lessons!!

****Who knew you shouldn't keep one leg straight down on your bike when your coasting?

****Who knew that my tendency to go fast would cause a problem?  (Ironically enough I got home and found a speed camera ticket waiting for me...so yes I go to fast in my car too!!)

****Who knew that the big tree root would snake across the trail???

****Who knew that hitting your front brake on a bike going downhill was a bad idea??? (Ok maybe I should have known that!)

Yup....I went down!!!!  Face plant into the trail!

I immediately looked back, fearing that jason would be barreling over me at any second!   The look on his face made me bust up laughing!!!  Horror is the best way to describe his expression!!!  He later told me that I somehow managed to fall off my bike gracefully...not exactly slowly but gracefully.  Go figure. (Like I believe that graceful thing...he's a man in love and he had just witnessed his girlfriend take a nasty tumble!!)

I hoped up and quickly checked myself over. Before I could second guess myself I hopped back on my bike and headed down the trail.  Focused on keeping is slow...coasting with my feet parallel and not one hanging low....and just being safe!  Oh and with jason behind me muttering 'We need to start wearing helmets! That could have been bad.  Bring your helmet next time we plan to ride!'

Eventually we made it back to the lake...the other side from where we were parked so we had to get off our bikes and explore!

A little exploration later and we headed up and around the lake.

Sooooo...my injuries?  No blood drawn!!!!  My left side took the brunt of everything.  My wrist is a bit swollen....my Fitbit had to be loosened about two notches.  It aches...nothing sharp just a weird dull tingling ache.  My elbow is a bit bruised and brush burned.  And I have a massive bruise on the inside of my left calf.  Ironically enough (or not hahaha) the bruise edges almost perfectly match the size of my bike peddle!  Go figure!     I got off easy!!!  Very easy!!!!  That could have been bad...very bad!!!

So the 'easy trail' we tried to find didn't materialize and we actually biked an  intermediate trail.  Oops. 

And yes...we do need to start wearing helmets!!! 

So on Tuesday  we headed for a different trail...this park was listed as 'easy'.    I hopped on my bike ready to ride! 

Easy my arse!!!!!   Ok in fairness, the red trail wasn't to bad!   The blue trail was terrifying!!!!  Downhills....hairpin switchbacks....drop offs....the trail was narrow so if you went to one side you were smacking trees....low hanging trees that you had to duck.  Uphill..downhill....obstacles galore!  Terrifying!  I  took is SLOW!!!  And I had to walk across some obstacles!  And I sure as heck didn't do the jumps!! (Or the rock garden on the yellow trail!).   I made it safely to the end of the blue trail and just hoped that the yellow trail (the way back to the car....since I didn't want to retrace my path on the blue trail) was easier!    It wasn't as terrifying and I did better on it!   But it was a heck of a lot of uphill!!!  And yes I did have to get off and walk some uphill and over some obstacles!!!  Turns out the yellow trail was called 'tough' in a review.

So wow...I guess I got my first mountain biking experiences the hard way!!!

So how did this equate into my thoughts?

It had made me more then ever motivated to get myself moving and into shape!   Running might not help the muscles for biking...but if I'm in better shape cardio-wise, then maybe I won't be breathing like a freight train when I am biking!!!

I actually got out and ran this morning!   Surprisingly I did better today than I did a few weeks back when I ran.   Still slow but not as rough and winded!

In the meantime, Jason  is looking at my bike to find out why my back brakes are not catching as well as they should...which forces me to use my front brakes more heavily!!  We figured that technical problem out today!!    I am focusing on changing the way I sit on the bike while I'm coasting!!! (Legs parallel and not one stretched low!). And well...I guess I'm pulling my helmet out for our next ride!  (I can't fault him for thinking a helmet is a good idea for me....after all it was just a few weeks ago that I fell while hiking....and I did sprain my ankle while we were together in the first month of dating!!!!  Hahaha

So this morning I hoped on the scale and I was not happy!   I'm back up.  A lot from post  sickness weight! (I had some food poisoning a few weeks back) down a pound or two from my pre sickness weight!   

I ate less than I expended for most of the past week!!!

My calories were not at the 1200 mark that I aim for though. 

Grrrrr

Plans for his week?   Nutritious choices!  Food that actually nourishes my body!!!

Between fog and cloud

Today was my official weigh in day.  I was nervous to see what my weight would be this week.  Last week I was really low...like 6 pounds down.  I know a good part of that low weight was the fact that I was just coming off of being sick...and I wasn't eating much yet.   So this weeks weigh in would be the true test as to what my weight did.....I weighed in at 245.2...that is 3 pounds down from my pre sick weight (and 3 pounds up from my sick weight).   I'm ok with that.  Obviously I would prefer it to be the lower weight...and I hate to write in this weeks weight since it looks like a gain....but I knew last week when I reported the low sick weight this this was a very real possibility!!!

This past weekend Jason and I headed back to the mountains to work on our 'let's hike every trail in the Shenandoah National Park' mission.   I tried to find hikes that were rated as easier since I had spent most of the preceding week sick.    We decided to hit up some connector trails and side trails that we had missed previously.  The first trail was down into a hollow....then a mile straight back up.  Difference in elevation 2000 feet...(in a mile) well then, it could be worse...but not exactly easy!   The second hike we did was much easier!!!    

This weekends fun was the fog.  As we climbed the mountain we rise above the fog.....the valley is a sea of fog!!!  Absolutely gorgeous!!!

Oh and we saw some deer.  Not to outbid the ordinary but fun anyway!

Even coming off being sick I could see a huge difference in my legs.   A few weeks back we did a hike that had a gain of elevation of about 1300 feet over 3 miles.   This week we had 2000 feet gain in a span of 1 mile.  My legs were not jelly!   Progress!!!!