Happy

I weighed myself this morning.  I was 213.1.  Drat….one pound away from that elusive 10 pound gone goal.  No fear.  I WILL conquer it!  (plus this will give me more time to look for that perfect charm!)

On Monday night I walked with Sherry and I admitted to her that I was having serious doubts about completing my mileage goals for this month.  Yeah, I’ve literally ridden or otherwise propelled myself about one hundred miles (ok, I think  as of right now it is 89 miles…but seriously, don’t we all round up in that case?) in the last week to put myself in spitting distance of this mileage goal.   I was fighting that fat mini me that was telling me to quit.  Why bother.   The fat mini me was telling me that “You are tired” and “seriously why does it matter anyway?”  I was starting to listen to the voice.  

Once I voiced it with Sherry and she gave me her support (Thanks Sherry…you are tops!) it was out in the open.  I can’t say that I was gung ho to finish the challenge after our talk…but I DID get on the exercise bike and knocked out a few miles last night.  And this morning I got up and rode.  After my ride this morning I find myself with 37.57 miles left to complete before midnight Saturday night.  That is about 9.39 each of the remaining 4 days.  I can do this if I ride each and everyday.  My walk with Sherry on Thursday eveningis extra…as is my planned lunch time walk with Shantel at work on Thursday.  Maybe with those extra miles I can finish this up on Friday and be one day early!!

My ride this morning was a good one.  I just felt good.  Yeah, my legs screamed at me a few times.  Yeah, my right wrist kept going numb.   Yeah I was breathing hard on a few of the hills.  But you know what? It was a damn good ride!   And the numbers proved it!

I screeched to a halt (ok, my bike doesn’t screech…but it sounded so awesomely dramatic didn’t it?) in my drive way and whipped out my cell phone that was tracking my stats through the app mapmyride (That is the app/website that I use to track my progress).  I glanced down at the numbers while I wheeled my bike onto the deck.  I started grinning from ear to ear.   I added almost 2 miles to my ‘typical’ distance today and pushed myself over the number that I wanted to see today.  I then noticed my average speed. Yup…I’m the killer!  I’ve been averaging about 12.5 and today I knocked out a 13.2 average speed.  WEEEE

A wall or two to climb

As I approached my 40^th birthdayhttp://mfclingan.blogspot.com/2012/12/turning-40.html   (sorry, I haven’t figured out how to insert a link whilst on my cell phone, so I’ll just include the web address)  I took a very clear look at my life.  I didn’t like what I saw.  Was this a midlife crisis?  I don’t know.   I just know that I didn’t like where I was. I felt as if I was backed into a dark dark corner and there was no readily available way out. The walls surrounding me where thick and high.   But I realized that there was one little spark of a chance to fix something…You see, I realized that if I could just get a toe hold I may be able to start climbing the wall to remove myself from that dark dank corner.  I vowed to attack the only thing that I could fix on my own.  That was my weight.   I started to attack the weight problem (and continue to attack).   My hope was that if I got to the top and could start to see over the wall that I was climbing that a few things could happen. One was that  I hoped that the other side of the wall would be bright, sunny and a happy place.  But barring that, because I knew that there were/are many facets of my life that were out of place I hoped and prayed that the strength that I found while climbing over that first wall would be enough to carry me up and over the next wall.  I prayed that the strength and courage and fortitude that I built as I crawled out of that first place would help me as I crawled through holes and scaled previously insurmountable walls.  

 

I started scaling that first wall at the very end of December/beginning of January.  I didn’t see anything different in my life. The other problems were still there.  I kept plugging along.  I started feeling happier, my exercise was working as therapy within me to clear my mind and erase some of the stress.  I was moving along.  The other side of the wall still looked dark and bleak but instead of cowering in the corner of that dark place I was doing everything I could to get to a better place.

 

As the last 9 months have rolled by, I’ve had another wall pop up in my path.  The strength that I discovered with my weight loss has helped me start to scale that next wall.  Success really does breed success.

 

I’m facing my challenges dead on and I’m winning.  And the best part?  For the first time in recent years I’m daring to dream about the future. For the first time in recent years I want to organize my life.  I want to make my life better.  I want to do what I can to be successful.  I’m not just existing, I’m actually wanting to LIVE. 

 

Excess weight drug me down….losing the weight is the catalyst to set me free!

 

 

I’m totally within spitting distance of getting my next charm.  I know round about what I want to get.  I haven’t shopped for it (to even know if they have anything like what I want) but I know what I want.

 

I will not......

In the month of July I stumbled upon a challenge that really held appeal for me.  It was/is called the Move you’re a$$ challenge.  It is a monthly challenge in which each participant sets their own goals.  It is a mileage goal (ok, to be fair to countries that use the metric system) and there are some people that have insanely high monthly goals.  Seriously, there is one person that has a 1000 mile goal (well, maybe it’s a km goal…which makes it a little less daunting now that I think about it).   There are some people on there that only aim for 20 or 30 miles for the month.  So this challenge is individually tailored by each person.  WE decide what our goal is.  Then you just periodically post how many miles you have completed to date and they update a Google spreadsheet that we can all see. So this way you can see where you stack with everyone else.  If you post your miles daily, that’s good.  If you post a week worth of miles at once it’s all good.  No stress no nothing.  Pretty easy challenge I’d have to say.

 

In the month of July I set a goal for myself. I decided that I could attain 150 miles.  Sadly, I got sick and missed a whole week of riding….ouch!  The month started winding down and I was short on completed miles.  Not too bad, I just had to ride 3 out of 5 days.  Not too bad.   I pushed myself to get out there and ride and run.  I squeaked it but I managed to get my 150 miles in.  Knowing that I had done 150 miles but in essence had missed at least a week of exercise, I was a bit more ambitious when I set my August goal.  I decided that I could swing 200 miles. 

 

And here is where we have a problem.  I kind of fiddled around the beginning of the month.  Kind of?   OK, I did.   I did thankfully put 20-30 miles into the books each week….but since I’m reasonably sure that August only has 4 weeks and not 8-10 weeks I have to admit that I didn’t do enough to reach a 200 mile goal.   I’m still only consistently riding 10-15 miles on my road bike at anyone time (and usually toward the lower number…darn hills get me!) so it’s not a simple thing of just riding once or twice to complete all the miles.

 

So where exactly am I?   As of this exact moment I’m 89.15 miles into my goal.  The bad part?  I’ve only got 9 days left to knock out roughly 111 miles.   That is 12.3 miles a day.  Quite doable.  My normal morning ride is 10.5 miles….so one extra loop in the north end of the  park (the Antietam battlefield) would add the extra miles if I were only riding that day.  If I just did my short 10.5 route I would need to pair it with a run.  EVERY DAY.

 

I have a couple things up my sleeve that I may pull out to help me add some mileage. 

 

• the exercise bike-  indoor equipment bores me…but if I hop on that while watching tv in the evening there is a cool 10-15 miles.  (So basically, while I’m watching Dexter on Sunday night, I need to be riding…..and when I’m watching my tivo’d Breaking bad on Monday night…ride).  One additional ride (basically ride outside and then ride inside) would set me up ahead of the game and get me a little bit out of the hole.
• Of course I’m trying to run…so if I run once or twice to round this week out and run my 3-4 times next week I can expect anywhere between 12-18 miles from that.  
• Sherry and I are walking tonight and will probably walk at least once next week…so there is between 3-8 miles
• Lunch time walks.  It doesn’t net much but each time I walk on my lunch break and do the circle around town I earn about 1.5 miles.  Not much…but every little bit counts!
• My ace in the hole, but one I hesitate because I’d be pretty much by myself and I would rather not go up there and ride by myself…..The final day of the month is on a Saturday.  I get off work at noon.   I can take my bike up to the WM rail trail and ride. It’s flat and since it’s the hills that do me in on my road bike, I should be able to knock out some significant mileage.   Ohhh …for that matter maybe THIS weekend I can take my trek out and ride on the canal…..ride from Sharpsburg down to Harpers Ferry or some such ride…..and knock out some serious mileage on a nice FLAT terrain.  Knocking out 20 miles on one or two days would be SPECTACULAR. (and I don’t feel as iffy about riding here…probably because it’s so local to me.)  I still wouldn’t be out of the woods, but I’d be in better shape for actually accomplishing my goal in this challenge.

 

And I swear….next month I will NOT be scrambling at the end of the month!!!!! (And yes,  I’m choosing 200 again!  This time I will ROCK it!)

It's all me

About two years ago I decided to take the steps to follow through on one of my bucket list items.  Which one?  I decided that maybe just maybe I could complete a triathlon.   What had sparked me to think more deeply about this was the fact that CNN was calling for videos for their next batch of triathlon wannabes.  Yes, I made a video.  I was hopeful.  I wanted it.  No, I didn’t get selected.  And I threw in the towel.  I had attached a savior mentality to CNN’s role that I had hoped that they would play.  CNN was going to be my savior.  In my mind they were going to swoop in and save me from my own obese demise.  I was looking for a savior from a life of obesity.

 

I see this savior mentality over and over again in my ‘travels’ through the world of health and fitness.  The most frequent place to actually see this mentality is on shows like “The Biggest Loser” and “Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition”.   For the most part, the participants on those shows are barely living. They have given up.  They are too enmeshed in their obesity to help themselves.  They are waiting for a savior to ride the white horse into their lives and fix them.  Time and time again we watch these people get the news that they are picked to transform their lives.  We hear them babble about how they can’t do it without Chris, or Jillian or Bob…their saviors.  They are so happy because their savior has entered their life.   And I’m not discounting the work that these trainers are doing.  They ARE invaluable and if I would have ever been brave enough to send in a video and gotten picked I would have been just as excited and would have loved to have their expertise and support. I probably would have been no different; I would have seen them as my savior from obesity.  I would have placed so much importance upon these people.

 

I wasn’t picked for CNN.  I never had the courage to send in a video for any of these obesity busting shows.  I didn’t have anyone ride in on a white horse to slay my obesity.  I’m glad.  I needed to learn that my salvation from obesity can’t come from someone else but from deep within myself.   It is all me.  

 

So what do I think about the CNN thing? I’m toying with submitting another video later this year if they decide to continue on with this storyline/project.  The video will be MUCH different.  I won’t be looking for someone to slay my obesity for me.  That is all me and I’ll make that clear.  It will be a video talking about how much I want this so that I can continue to strive to be the best me there is.   But you know what?  It’s no longer a matter of life or death in my mind.  I don’t need someone to hand me salvation from obesity.  I already have that deep inside myself.

 

 

Yesterday I kept my eating totally under control.  I got my exercise in and I was very close to my goal of water intake. Today I’ve already been out on my bike and my food has been planned for the day.  I am planning to go to zumba tonightand life is good.  I’m working this…and I know that I’ll see results!

Old Habits Die Hard

My world has fallen apart things with my husband went from bad to worse.  There is a silver lining in that, because sometimes you have to reach rock bottom before you can move on.  So we reached rock bottom.  The bad part?  You don't reach rock bottom and immediately have things resolve.  Rock bottom means that there is a new start. Where the new path leads, I don't know yet...but at least I'm on a path.    Simultaneously with that I had a handful of friends stab me in the back (metaphorically).   I was not exercising with my previous intensity due to this foot problem.  I was reeling from everything and it set me up for some bad bad things.

 I  reverted back to long known habits.  Comforting habits.  Friendly habits.  Yes, I eat.  I don't say no when a piece of cake is offered.  I don't say no when I'm asked to bake cookies.  I don't restrict myself while baking those said cookies.  No is not a word that is in my vocabulary when it comes to food.  I haven't gone totally off the cuff, but lets be honest, it's not good.  

When one thing falls away I seem to lose it in all aspects.  What does that mean?  It means that I've been sporadic at best with my exercise.  Once again...not good.

So the old habits have reared their ugly head and I succumbed to the pressure.   Since the beginning of July when all of this started (that is when I slowed down my exercise due to my foot). I have pretty much not lost any weight.  I have wasted two almost two months!   That makes me angry!

So baby steps.  I'm going to focus.  I can do this.  I know how to do it.  I want to do it.  I want to be in control of my life and I WILL be!

Today.....my focus is getting my water!   Like I said, baby steps.  I need to drink my water.   Yes, I'm going to try to keep my calorie intake under control.  But the ONLY thing I'm worried about is water.  Ohhh and I already ran today!!!!!!!

Lifestyle

I've been totally honest with myself the last few days.  I feel more in control.  It's amazing how actually taking control of my food addiction and actually controlling it versus letting it control me changes my whole attitude.  I like being in control!  It's very empowering.

I got out for a ride this evening. (Thanks to my big brother for once again coming through for me and giving me a small lesson on road bike tires.........he's always been awesome....however, don't tell him, I don't want it to go to his head).   It felt GREAT!   It also reminded me that I've not just been running from the truth in my eating.  I've been running from the truth or rather running from the acceptance of what I know to be true.  What is that?  It's the truth of knowing that the life that I want to live, the body that I want to live in, the energy and vibe that I want to have in my life is all attainable....but it means that I have to actually get off my butt and LIVE that life....put the work in to HAVE that life.  It means that I go out and run even when I don't want to.  It means I ride even when life screams at me to not ride.  It means that when it's pouring rain and I can't follow my original exercise plan that I get on the exercise bike or get my butt to the gym.  It means I do what is needed to have the body I want....to have the energy that I want...to be the person that I know that I'm capable of being.  It's not going to come to me...I have to go after it!

I have made the decision to live this lifestyle.  I don't demand or expect anyone to join me on this quest.  I have never expected Todd to run with me.  I've never expected Todd to get a road bike and ride with me. (However, I do hope that he does continue...or restart, to ride with me on the canal).  I don't expect him to be gung ho.  I have hoped that he would support me (and he has, in a passive way.....however he did support me in a very hands on way at the Donut Alley Rally).   I would LOVE to have him join in and embrace this lifestyle by doing everything with me...but I don't expect it.  This is MY decision and my lifestyle.   However, there are some signs of him taking a more active roll......

So the moment of truth is upon us.  Friday night was the Donut Alley Rally.  I had a great time.  I had asked Todd to go along as my cheering section. He grudgingly went and found out that he really liked the energy that coursed through everyone in attendance.  He has talked to me about starting to run....in fact he's told me that tomorrow he plans to run Day One, day one of the c25k program.  I

The weather today was GORGEOUS!!!!   The weather for my ride was fabulous.  I got home, swapped out my shoes and push mowed our property.....so an hour bike ride followed by an hour and fifteen minutes of push mowing.  GREAT activity for the evening.  And yes, I ate my leftover pizza and I don't feel at all guilty (yes, I ate a LOT of pizza today...both lunch and dinner..)

Honesty

I've not been honest.  I've tracked my food....sorta.   Yes, I go on every day.  Yes, I put my food in.  Or rather I put in my 'plans'.    I have been living in the delusion that I'm doing OK because I'm tracking.  However, I have to admit.....when things go awry and I allow stress to overtake me and I eat something extra......or when my plans don't go the way I want and I eat something other than planned.....or when.....yeah, best laid plans have not been my friend, I don't ALWAYS go back and change my food on myfitnesspal.  This is BAD.  I am hurting NO ONE but myself!

I've struggled with my exercise in the last week or so also.   Yesterday morning I got up early and got ready for my bike ride...and had a flat tire on my road bike.  I struggled to change the tube the last time and eventually had to go into a bike shop and look like a retard and ask for assistance. (my brother was out of town).  I have no problem changing the tires on my Trek or even my husbands trek...but this road bike KILLS me.  I never got it changed...and I've talked to my brother and tomorrow night I'll be going up to figure out what 'concept' I'm missing...because SOMETHING is not clicking for me.  SO my ride yesterday went out the window.  By the time I thought about switching and riding on the canal on my Trek I didn't have enough time.

I woke up this morning.  I rolled out of bed.  I couldn't ride so I was determined to RUN.    And then I heard it......pouring rain.  GRRRR  So no exercise today.   The saving grace for TODAY is that I have zumba tonight and yes, I am packed and ready to zumba after work.

Honesty...I ate an extra piece of breakfast pizza this morning.  I have already gone on and adjusted the food intake for the day.  I'm good.  I've got this!   Honesty with myself is the most important thing!!!

I did it for the donut!

August 9th...I have mentioned that date over and over in my posts in conjunction with running.  I had planned to run at least three 5k's this year.  The possible culmination (yeah, I'm already looking for another one...so it won't be the culmination)  would be the Do-nut Alley Rally in my hometown of Hagerstown, MD.    As soon as I heard about the fact that the local legendary do-nut shop sponsored a 5k I knew I wanted to run it.....I knew this months and months before I ever ran a step.  So August 9th was the date that I was looking for...the day that I would run the do-nut alley rally.

I was worried the weeks building up to this 5k....I had this pesky pain caused by the plantars fasciitis that I had been diagnosed with a month earlier.   I knew I wasn't going to run it to set any personal records...that was not my plan.  My plan was to simply 'run' and finish.  (seriously, I hadn't run more than 5 miles TOTAL in the previous 6 weeks).   My foot wasn't/isn't better so I wasn't sure how it was going to work.  Stupidly, I canned pickles the night before the race....so my foot took a beating with that! (yes, my foot ACHED after the hours of standing). The icing on the cake?   The weather forecast was HORRIBLE!  I was determined.  This was NOT a race I was sitting out.  Rain or shine....ache or pain...I was RUNNING!

Did it rain????   It rained on and off all day long. (this was an evening run).  It looked clear when we made our way to the do-nut shop (yes, this was held outside of the local legendary do-nut shop!).  I picked up my swag bag and got my timing chip.  And then it started to rain.  Yup, we were all huddled under umbrellas while we waited.  Sherry and I were not to be deterred....wet or dry we were running!  (pardon the crappy picture, I was dodging raindrops and of course my cell phone was in a baggie to protect it...so it wasn't exactly the best conditions for a picture!)

The rain however, did stop with about 15 minutes left until race time!   WEEEEE.   We all posed for some extra pictures.  And passed a bit more time.  I had the pleasure to run this race with Sherry, Paula and her daughter Alex.  :-)   

I even had time to take a picture of a tattoo that really intrigued Todd (it's a Beatles tattoo).  Turns out the tattoo was on a gal that both Sherry and Paula went to school with.  You can see that my shirt is already pretty wet and the run hasn't even started!  (I think we may be running a mud run in a team with this gal!)

We moved up to the start line and waited for the gun to go off (well, really there was no gun....or maybe we were just talking and missed it!)    One last picture and then we were off!

 We started out and I cautioned Sherry to pace it.  I reminded her that we did NOT have to keep pace with the  people that had started out beside us.  We needed to keep a pace that we comfortable with us.   Within a half of block or so the crowd thinned out and we settled down into a comfortable pace.  Ufortunately, we lost track of Paula and Alex after the first quarter of a mile. We kept a comfortable pace, using my HRM as a good guide to where we needed to be running to keep us from wearing ourselves out.   At one point I was breathing heavy and Sherry threw my own words back at me and said "I hear you breathing, but are you dying?"   She knew what my answer would be...that NO, I wasn't dying.  So I KNEW what her response would be (the same thing I've been telling her)  "then keep going!"  The race course was actually ingenious.  We weaved through some roads and then into a grave yard.....and we did at least 2 of the miles of this run inside the graveyard (no public roads to have to close..no cars no nuttin').  As we got to the graveyard I saw my brother and his family standing along side the road at the entrance gates.  They cheered for Sherry and I!  It was awesome!   We waved and said hi and trucked on.   No stopping for us!   We weaved into the graveyard and pretty soon saw two more people on the side of the road.  Mom and dad stood there cheering for me!  As we ran by I introduced Sherry to mom and dad and they started cheering for her also.   We ran on.  Mom and dad moved to a different spot in the graveyard and they waited for us to run a mile or so and cheered for us as we finished up the loop through the graveyard.  As we left the gates and reentered the public roads my brother, sister in law and there three kids were there cheering us on again!  Motivated and knowing the end was in sight, we waved said hi and bye and kept going.

As we turned onto the final stretch before we turned onto the finish line I looked down for the first time and took note of the time.  It was only 8:02.  Uhhh the race started at 7:30 or thereabouts.  So we were with less than a half mile from the end and we were at only 32 minutes.  I chewed on that thought in my head and within a minute or two told Sherry about my thought that we just may have a chance to be under 40 minutes or at the very least she had a VERY good chance of setting  personal record for herself.  That was all that was said.   We reached the final corner and turned onto the last stretch. I could see the finish line.  It took me a few seconds to register that the time on the big clock was saying 39 and some change.  I made one comment to Sherry.  It was something along the lines of  "Oh no, I refuse to cross the line over 40 minutes."   I then instructed her to haul A$$ if she wanted to beat the 40 minute mark.  Sherry took off like a bat out of hell and I followed along a few paces behind.

My official time was 39:23.  I'm actually REALLY good with that time.  I was running on a bum foot after not running for weeks.   My PR for a 5k was the 38:20.  So I only lost 1 minute and three seconds during the last month of hell.  NOT bad.  Yes, I had originally planned to run the Do-nut Alley Rally in 36 minutes or less...but life changed and I rolled with it!

Of course we had to take the obligatory post race picture!

After our picture taking extravaganza, we headed down the alley toward the do-nut shop (yes, the do-nut shop is in the alley....stop laughing, these donuts are HEAVENLY and well worth the trip down the alley!) .   It was do-nut heaven festival.  The smell of freshly cooked donuts wafted through the air (this is a normal scent in the alley).  But the best part?  About every 2-3 minutes the back door of the do-nut shop opened and out would come a person carrying trays of donuts.  They walked through the crowds and we were able to simply grab a warm freshly baked do-nut as they walked by!  

Why yes!  I do believe I DID have a do-nut.  I can not tell a lie.  I chose a cream filled chocolate iced do-nut and boy oh boy did it ever taste GOOD!  

I even have proof!!!!!!!!  (although I don't have a picture of the chocolate do-nut that I took a huge bite out of before I gave it to Todd!)

Ahhh....so what's up next?   Possibly the Muddy Mamma raising money for Girls Inc.  Or maybe a 5k raising money for Habitat for Humanity.  (both of those are in September).  Hmmm, there is a breast cancer run in Early October.  And let's not forget the specter of a turkey trot again.  Choices choice choices!

Restart and reinvent

The last two days I've lost control.  I've lost control of my eating.  I know what happened.  I made cookies.  I made the cookies for Todd...they were for his band practice and they are for a band that has been working with him for a while (I do that for long term clients sometimes).  I also brought some into work.   I made them on Wednesday night.  Cookie dough is a HUGE attraction for me.  HUGE.  So yes, I had some cookie dough.  Normally I am only irresistably drawn to the warm ooey gooey cookies......except for my banana peanut butter chocolate chip cookies. Uhhh yeah, those cookies are like crack!  And of course that's the cookie I made.  So out of control cookie consumption on wednesday evening and it carried into Thursday.  Uhhh NOT good.  But I recognize it and the problem WILL be rectified!
 

Songs are very powerful.  They make me smile, they make me cry that transport me back to a different time and place and evoke memories and feelings.  Lately on the one station that we listen to at work they have been playing a LOT of REO Speedwagon….in particular one song “Heard it from a Friend”.  This isn’t a bad thing.  It’s a good song.  It transports me back through the years.  Each time I hear this song I am transported back to a time where I am roughly 20 years old and I’m in my car driving around Fort Wayne , Indiana .  I am attending college and myself and my friends are out having fun.  The warmth and acceptance of the friends that are in the car with me is evident in the feelings that flow over me.  However, more importantly, for a few seconds I forget that I have become the jaded 40 year old woman that has had her dreams and hopes squashed like a bug on the windshield of life. For those few moments I am the idealistic young woman.  For that brief flash of time I feel as if the world is still at my fingertips.  I am positive that my world will turn out exactly as I had always dreamed. 

 

The real world comes crashing back down upon me.  I won’t lie.  Those few moment of memories and feelings that the song evokes fades. Life wasn’t what I planned. 

 

At zumba the other night a girl walked in…flush from the beauty and fresh love of her very recent wedding and the honeymoon that she had just returned from only two days earlier.  I choke down the bitter pill of her happiness and wish her well .  I try not to cry when she talks about how “I just got hired so I’m now officially a teacher too”  She then says “It’s all falling into place”.   Well, it didn’t fall into place.  Yes, I eventually got married…I was also full of happy love….but it’s been a rough rough patch for quite a while.  It wasn’t the ‘fall into place fairytale life”.   I counted back on face book.  I’ve had no less than 6….friends have babies in the last two to three months.  SIX.   One more had a baby that is not included in the six, simple because I’m not friends with her on facebook and 2 friends who have recently announced pregnancies.  I would not want them to hide their births or good news from me.  But it HURTS.  That was MY fairytale.  That was MY dream….that’s been dashed.  It hurts.

 

So what the heck does this have to do with a weight loss journal?   Everything.  Good weight and good healthy habits are grounded in having our whole life in balance.  So it has EVERYTHING to do with it.  But even more importantly I need to turn my life changes into a full all encompassing change.  This is my chance to reinvent myself.  I don’t know what kind of person I want to be.  For 40 years I wanted very specific things.  I’ve dreamt for all of my life about some very specific dreams.  It’s not easy to change those dreams. It’s not easy to just all of a sudden have new dreams.  But I know this…..there is no better time like NOW to reinvent who I am!   A new, better than ever

 

Tingling and Alive

I woke up this morning and I knew that I was going for a bike ride.  It was scheduled.  It was on the books.  I was doing it.   I had made plans with Todd for the morning, all centered upon my bike ride.  I was going to ride early and on the way home, I would stop at the local ‘gathering hole’ where Todd would meet me and where we would breakfast together.  After breakfast, he would continue on to the studio (work) and I would bike the remaining 3 miles home…where I would have a bit of time to relax and get ready for my work day.  All planned….and I woke up ready to roll with that plan.  And then I stood up to go to the bathroom and my head felt like it was going to totally explode.  Woo hooo, what a fun thing to discover upon awakening.   I stumbled to the bathroom.  I listened for the sound of rain…..I wanted to hear the sound of rain so that I had a valid excuse to not go out riding.   I heard nothing…but made my way back to bed, hoping that a bit of rest would ease up the pressure in my head.  Seriously?  

 

I laid there thinking.  I knew that if I didn’t ride that I would castigate myself all day. I knew I had to push through and ride.  I changed the plans.  We went for an early breakfast where I downed some ibuprofen and some diet Pepsi (double whammy….meds and the breakfast drink of the Gods).  When I got back to the house, I prepped as much as I could for my day (packed my lunch) and then I headed out.  Yes, my headache had eased off to near nothing.   I checked my tires and headed out.   Ahhh the feeling of the wind on my face……the birds chirping…..the overcast skies….the sprinkles of rain.   What a feeling of being ALIVE!

 

Excuses.  We are so full of them. Headache, rain, sore foot, busy schedule, time of the month, too tired, to achy…..the list goes on and on and on.   But when we push through the excuses and carry through with our plans to exercise and better ourselves, the world opens up and it’s an amazing place!    I would have missed the euphoric feeling of a great workout.  I would have missed the gorgeous scenery.  I would have missed seeing the young girl selling cucumbers, trying to earn enough  money to buy something for herself. (yes, I swung around and ended up buying a bushel of cucumbers…..I’ll be making pickles…cinnamon….icicle…..dill…..and we didn’t plant cucumbers for some odd reason……ok ok ok, the girls brother works with me…so he delivered the produce to me at work…and since I had no money, I’m sending the money home with him).  I would have missed SO much!

 

Even more than that feeling of actually living, I would have denied myself the opportunity to take a step toward the ‘me’ that I want to be.  Yes, I know where I want to be and I know that it takes work.  If I would have skipped my ride and listened to those gazillion excuses I would have missed an opportunity to move closer to my goals.   Every day is an opportunity to move closer to my goals and dreams.  I don’t want to waste ANY days!

A better me

Losing weight the CORRECT way is a lifestyle change. It is a total change in how we view our lives and the world around us.   To really make life altering changes that result in weight loss that is maintained, we have to look deeply into our lives.  It’s not just eating and exercise. It is the very fiber of our lives that we have to evaluate.  

 

Obesity, or even just being overweight has a profound impact on how we live our lives.  Some of us had circumstances and situations in our lives that caused us to turn to food to bring on obesity….those circumstances impacted us.   Others of us are simply fighting genetics and a love of food that has caused a weight issue in our lives.  Regardless of if we are dealing with one issue or two issues or even untold other scenarios about how obesity affects us, know that it DOES affect.

 

For me, I don’t know of any deep seated reason for my obesity.  Maybe some psychologist out there would beg to differ, but I feel I’m a product of genetics and growing up in a family that loved food. Food was an integral part of our lives.  It got out of control with me and left me morbidly obese.  Yes, 315 pounds (my highest) was morbidly obese.  (I’m still considered obese…..I have about 16 pounds until I can be considered in the ‘overweight’ category. There will be much celebration when I reach that weight!)   I began to live my life as a fat person.  There are things I’ve wanted to do, that I didn’t do because “I’m Fat.”   There were places I would have gone but I felt unworthy because, “I’m fat”.   I let the fat eat at me from the inside.  I let it rule my life.

 

I started reading a book the other day.  I actually picked up the book because it was free (gotta love the free books for my kindle…I’ve read some amazing reads, and admittedly some pretty lame ones too…LOL) and because it was about running.  It is called Running the Edge: Discover the Secrets to Better Running and a Better life.  It’s by Adam Goucher and Tim Catalano .   I hadn’t even gotten past the first chapter and I was highlighting sections of the book because it was speaking to me.  Seriously…I NEVER highlight books that I’m reading (ok, I have once before because I wanted to see how the feature worked on my kindle…..I’m a geek…what of it.?)   It’s all tied to running…but it is stuff that goes much deeper than running.

 

So my thoughts from this book. 

 

Mediocrity.  I have settled for a life of mediocracy.  I have not pushed myself to be GREAT.  I have not tried.  I have just settled in and let life wash over me.   I have become complacent with everything being good enough.   I don’t want just ‘good enough’ anymore.  I want spectacular.  I want awesome.  I want over the top superb!   I need to take control of my own life.  CONTROL.   That means not only in the food I eat and the exercise I do….but also in how I spend my spare time.  How I approach my finances.  How I attempt to live my life.  I have control over my life and I’m no longer going to sit back and allow life to happen…I want to push forward and MAKE it happen.

 

The second thing that stuck out is a bit of a story that these two authors shared. They talked about how early on in their friendship that they decided that the adage that everyone uses so much “someday I want to…” was not allowed in their vocabulary.  They made allowances for some things that it really is not feasible to do at that point and realize that sometimes it is acceptable to say “someday I want to….”  (for example….”someday I want to have kids”   or  in my case… “someday we will finish our patio and get our hot tub in working order”….it’s acceptable to say that because right now it is not a possibility due to money constraints.)   But overall,  all those things that I you say “someday I want to…” needs to be DONE.  They talked about how one day one of them said  “someday I want to learn to scuba dive”  so they went right out and signed up for scuba diving classes.  But they also talked about how one of them had said “I’ve always wanted to ride my bike the 50 miles to my parents house.  So 2-3 hours later on old ratty bikes (one of them borrowed) they were on the road in the blazing sun riding for 50 miles.  They did it.  The conquered and they conquered it in a blaze of glory.   They did not wait until the next day.  THEY DID it.  The were LIVING.

 

I want to live my life that way.  I don’t want to be mediocre.  I want to live to my fullest and push for greatness….and I want to LIVE!   My weight may hold me back on some things (seriously..I think they have weight limits for sky diving…which I’m still pondering….so right now I may not qualify for it…but I may qualify for it in a month down the line….should I decide that I’m serious about that thought).  

 

This morning I went out running.  I learned a valuable lesson.   Cheap ‘knock off’ KT tape is NOT a good choice.  I may have saved 8 bucks…but it was not a good savings….considering I went through more pieces of tape just trying to get it to stick to my skin in the first place (no I’m not a grease ball) and then halfway through my run I could feel that it had totally popped free.  SO off to the pharmacy on my lunch break to buy the REAL stuff.  I have been using the KT Pro…..the local pharmacy sells just the straight KT tape. I’m going to try that next.  If that doesn’t work, I’ll be back to the pro stuff. 

 

I ran 2.5 miles. I would have run longer, but I ran out of time.  Yeah, I got a late start. Seriously, I blame it on the off brand KT tape….messing with that had to have killed all my extra time!  I felt good and I’m going to say that I’m ok to run the Donut Alley Rally on Friday night.

 

So my exercise plans for this week.

 

Monday:   Run-  morning

                  Exercise bike- evening (optional…depending on time and opportunity)

Tuesday:  Road bike-  Morning

                 Zumba- evening

Wednesday:  Road bike – Morning

                 Exercise bike- Evening (optional…depending on time and opportunity)

Thursday:  Rest day

                Walk- evening

Friday:   Donut Alley rally Race

Saturday:  Road bike

Sunday:  Run AND road Bike

 

I wanted to try to do my higher impact things earlier in the week to save my foot for my race.   Even though I’m not running the race to set any PR, I do want to finish it without having to hobble or even crawl across the finish line…which means at this time babying my foot.  So that’s my plan. J  Lets see if the weather cooperates!

Weekend control

Day two of August is here.  I'm doing ok with my eating.  I really was just a thing of saying "I'm going to do it" and actually doing it.  Todd and I even stopped for ice cream at one point and I managed to have my ice cream and eat it too.  Yes, I had to adjust something in the budget for later in the day...but I managed.  And my weight has dropped quite a bit. (yeah, I'm sure some of my weight being up on Monday was due to water retention due to the chinese food, mexican food and pizza that I consumed in the days leading up to the weigh in...ohh and the lack of water and flood of Diet soda).  So it's working.

I've worked out pretty regularly this week.  I've been happy with what I've done.  Ok, I'm happy that I worked out every day.  I'm not happy because I want to do more....

The weekend is upon me.  I personally find it so much easier to eat 'right' on weekdays. I"m in a routine.  Routines are good.  On weekends life goes upside down and I have to loosen my reigns on the control sometimes.  Wait, wait wait.......I am ALWAYS still in control.  No one forces food into my mouth. (well not usually...Todd has been known to shove snacks in my mouth.).   Yes, I am in control.  I may have more limited options and I may have to use more willpower, but I'm still totally in control!

Don't Wait

Finally....July is over.   I was waiting with bated breath for that horrible month to be behind me.  I know that I'm still dealing with the fallout of July, which is why I sat with my foot on ice after zumba last night.  (and why I will roll my foot on that same frozen bottle of water...refrozen of course after running tonight.)   I couldn't wait for July to be over so that I could have a fresh start.

But I didn't wait until August to have my fresh start.  I planned my eating and kept it totally under control on July 30th.  I also ran on the 30th.  I carried that trend on with July 31.  I ate within my caloric budget and went to zumba.  I am now rolling into that fresh start with two days of 'fresh start' under my belt before the new month really even gets going.

So many times we say "I'll start on Monday"  or "I'll start with the new month, or the new year or whatever"   There is no time like NOW to start.  No excuses.    Excuses don't help us reach our dreams and goals.   Going out after those goals and dreams are what causes them to happen.

So today starts my next monthly challenge to propel myself 200 miles.  That's 50 miles a week.  I typically do about 10-15 on my bike...about 3 times a week.....I'm hoping to get back to where I was with running which was about 10-12 miles a week.  Plus random walks interspersed through the week.   So I should be be able to accomplish this goal!

DONUTS

Sometimes things happen for a reason.  Seriously, they do!  I’m going to just say one last time…July has been the month from H E double hockey sticks!    It’s been a disaster emotionally and physically.  I ate and ate and ate.  I gained a total of 1 pound for the month of July.  It could have been worse (thank God for the flu).  I can use excuses about the restricted exercise.  I can use excuses about the emotions that kicked me A$$.  I can do all of that, but I have to also admit that I was like a shark in  chum filled water.  It was a feeding frenzy that grew a little more crazy each day.   No more.  I want to get to my goal and I know how to do it!

When the doctor told me I had a debilitating and life threatening injury that would prevent me from running or doing anything high impact I was bummed out.  My running was progressing.  I was seeing progress in my running.  I was having some fast paced runs. Seriously, I was starting to rival Jackie Joyner Kercee  in speed.  (shut up….. I know that I’m old and out of touch with the current stuff….but that’s the only runner I could think of!)  I was flying on my runs.  I was even breaking a 12 minute mile on some of my good runs.  OK, so maybe I was only rivaling her in my head, but the victory to me was just the same.  It was only a few months earlier that I couldn’t even run 60 seconds without feeling as if I was going to collapse in a heap of sweaty fat on the side of the road.  I had gotten to the point where I could run straight without stopping. I had pushed myself through the ‘You can’t do this’ mentality and starting just doing it.  I was starting to see my average pace drop.  I was DOING IT.    I had broken my goal of running a 5k in less than 40 minutes…in fact I blew my goal out of the water.   I was registered for the Krumpes Donut Alley Rally.   In case you don’t know what Krumpes is….Krumpes has been a tradition in my family for longer than I’ve been around.  My parents would leave church on Sunday nights (way back int he 70's)  and swing down to this little alley donut shop that was open from late evening until early morning and pick up donuts.  When my parents left Hagerstown to go to Bible College and work in the ministry as a preacher and preachers wife, we would still visit family in Hagerstown,  Krumpes donuts were a staple on each visit.  Eventually we moved back to this area and my brother introduced his kids to the love of a Krumpe Donut.  So when I heard that Krumpes was doing a 5k I KNEW it was one I wanted to do.  In fact, I wanted to do this run before I even started running seriously.  This is the epitome of running. (and they BETTER give me a free donut after I flail around acting like I’m running!)  Anyway, I registered for this run a few months back.  In fact, this is the run that I based my future running off of.  I’ve said over and over that I will give running a go until August 9^th…..I will reevaluate at that time.  Ever wonder why August 9^th?   Well, because that’s the date of the Donut Alley Rally!  I wanted to do this run.  I NEEDED to do this run.  So when the doctor told me on July 3^rd that I shouldn’t be doing anything that was remotely high impact and to even limit walking for 4-6 weeks I was panicked.  That put me RIGHT at the Donut Alley Rally.  I waited….I watched.  I tried the sleeping boot.  I tried the shoe inserts, I bought the slip over arch supports.  I started taping my foot.  I iced and simultaneously rolled my foot on a frozen water bottle.  I stopped wearing heels.  I stopped any activity that caused an impact.  About a week or two I bought new running shoes.  I was getting antsy to recommence with running.   Yesterday I started to run.  My foot isn’t 100% well…but I’ve got a race to run.   I’m only giving myself a week and a half to prepare for it after exactly 5 weeks away from running.  So while I talked for a while about aiming for a new PR on the Donut Alley Rally, I will be running it to just plain and simply run it.  My goal is to finish it at this point.   

Oh, and my reevaluation about running….I’m going to continue.  

This upcoming race stressed me out for a while.  I wanted to run it so bad and I sat nursing an injury….trying to learn how to manage it and cause it to ease up.  I eventually said, ok…the event is raising money for a good cause one that escapes my memory at this time, so my money isn’t going to be wasted if I don’t run it.   That made me feel a bit better.   But this morning when I was running I realized that being preregistered for this race was a good thing…just as having the injury was a good thing.

The injury was good because it forced me to get out on my bike and push through the pain of ridinga road bike versus a mountain bike.  This was made easier since biking was my sole form of exercise (that could be because I was too lazy to make it to the gym to use the elliptical….oops).   Being preregistered for the race has motivated me to push myself.  Some may say I started back too early….but seriously, how long must one wait…because I know the old Maryfran would have waited until 6 years after the last twinge of pain had left my body.

Yesterday morning's run left me with 4.09 miles left to complete in July.  There was NO FREAKING WAY that I was going to miss my mileage goal by 4.09 miles.  I knew that Wednesday was to be a zumba day and that there was a good chance that I would get a short walk in with my husband but nothing NEAR the 4.09 miles….so I got off work at 6, ran to the pharmacy to pick up my husbands medicine, went to a store and picked him up a snack and then stopped him off his snack, drink and meds.  Then I rushed home to gear up like Lance Armstrong (albeit one without drugs in my system) and head out to get a few miles under my belt. Oh wait, it was getting late so I ended up gearing up and riding my exercise bike like a wild woman.  7.5 miles down..and my mileage goal is COMPLETE!!!!  YAY!!!!!


This morning....weighed myself and my weight is DROPPIING!   ~~cue angels singing~~

How quickly the mind forgets

I headed out this morning to really test out my foot.  Yes, I still have aches in my heel.  I am accepting that I have plantars fasciitis and that means that I will have to learn how to deal with that.  It's a thing of learning to manage I do believe.  SO I'm learning to manage.  I also know that getting the weight off of my body will help the issue!

So I headed out.  I was in my new bright blue shoes.  (ahhh how cool, the shoes match my current KT tape  (which you can't see in this picture).  Not for long...I'm switching to PINK tape after the blue is gone!     I woke up and started to get ready.  It was exactly 5 weeks to the morning since I last ran.  Wow....I was out of practice.  I used to get ready in a few minutes.  Today I was running in circles.  I got dressed then remembered my HRM.  I got that on and then taped my foot (that was my first priority) and headed to the kitchen.  I then remembered the need for my ipod.  I got that and was ready to head out and realized that...DUH, I need headphones.  Yeah, it was NUTS.   Finally I was out and in the car.    I was halfway to where I planned to run and I whacked myself in the forehead....DUH, I forgot my hat!   The hat is important for two reasons.  One, it keeps the sweat somewhat under control as it holds the sweat (yeah, my hats all have sweat stains on them...what of it?).  Secondly, my hair is shorter on top and the hat keeps my hair loosely under control.   Shortly after that discovery I figured out that I didn't have sunglasses either.  OH well......such is life. 


I started running.  I felt pretty good.  I ran for 2.57 miles.  It wasn't fast by any rate.  The five weeks off slowed me down a bit (however, in fairness I wasn't trying to run for speed, I was running just to test the waters).  I felt good.  I probably could have gone further, but I didn't want to push it.   I figured go shorter and see how my body reacts.  Yes, that is me after my run...really bad picture..but you can see the sun behind me (I was running toward the sun of course for part of it) so thus the need for the sunglasses...you can also see my out of control hair!  GRRR


So I was so discombobulated with my preparations that I made another error.....Yeah, what do you notice wrong with the picture to the right?????  Let me give you a hint...the picture was taken AFTER my run.  Yes, by golly.....I forgot to turn on my HRM when I started to run.  DUH.  Ok ok ok, so 5 weeks off threw me off my stride.  I've got this.  My planning and ease will come back!


I have had a goal of 150 miles in the month of July.  I am now about 3 miles from completing that goal.  My plan is to go out tonight on my bike to finish off that challenge.  And yes, I'm setting the challenge again in August.  Only I'm aiming for 200 miles!  :-) 

Soo, I officially had my weigh in this week...and I'm up for 1 pound in the month of July.  Yeah, my weigh in this week was NOT pretty.  I will say that I had chinese and mexican and I've been drinking a LOT of diet soda...so my body has been overloaded on sodium....but you know what...that's excuses.  I also ate not the greatest!   No looking back....looking forward to being back on my game!

The affect of our words

July.....wow, what a month. (and yes I am fully cognizant of the fact that it's not over yet).  At the very beginning of July I was officially diagnosed with Plantars Fasciitis and of  a little lessor of  concern Tarsal Tunnel.  I was told to limit my activities that were high impact.  That was followed up with a bout with the flu/food poisoning (the jury is out about which I had...all I know is that I was absolutely miserable!), on the heels of  that was dealt a huge emotional blow that has left me reeling.  (feel free to imagine and conjure up a story...tame or off the hook spicy...it's all good....imagination is a good thing  ha ha ha).  It's wreaked havoc on my exercise. Seriously, an injury/ache that limited my exercise, the flu that wiped me out and emotions that made me feel like I wasn't worthy of the time needed to invest in this process and new lifestyle.  What a bad combination.  July honestly would have been a TOTAL bust for me weight loss wise (that's assuming I don't gain for this last weigh in that will occur early next week) if it weren't for the fact that I had the flu and I puked some weight off of my body.

Exercise was wonky and lets face it...I'm a food addict.   Did I mention that there have been a lot of emotions involved in the last month?   Well there was.  I barely controlled my eating..there were a few stellar days of eating.  There were a few crazy days of eating.  There were a lot of borderline days of eating.


I went out riding today.  I procrastinated for quite some time this morning.  I was reading blogs and playing around on my computer.  Finally I pushed my computer aside and said, "no more until you go riding."   So I pushed myself out.  Oh yeah, my mind was screaming all sorts of excuses at me...but I ignored them!   I not only went for a ride....I pushed myself for an extra few hellish hilly miles.  OK ok ok, I have to admit it.  My rule is to only unclip and put my feet down if I have to at crossroads/stop signs.  Other than my little problem on the ride with my brother I have been able to hold onto that 'rule' .  Until today.  Yeah, I was on my 'new section' that was hilly.  VERY hilly.  I could see the tail end...the last stop sign before I got back to more familiar territory .  I was struggling up the last hill...out of the saddle...in the saddle..it didn't make a difference....my legs were SHOT at that point.  I went slower and slower, struggling.  I went so slow that I started to go over.   Go over as in FALL DOWN.   Yes, I was of course clipped in.  I saw my life flash before my eyes as I tilted over.  For a split second I thought that I was going to have a date with the pavement.  Somehow instinct took over and I kicked my heel outward, popping me out of the clip and at one of the last possible minutes put my foot on the ground and caught myself.   I rested a few minutes and I'm embarrassed to say that I walked the last 10 feet up the feel (yeah, I was THAT close and I have NEVER walked up a hill...so I ruined THAT perfect record)  Regardless, my ride was done and I DID get back on the bike and went the last 5 miles to get myself home.  :-)

Today as I was slogging up the biggest hill I encountered a motorcycle with two riders came up behind me.  I vaguely knew they were there (hello, you can hear them coming).  They were out cruising and enjoying the historic views surrounding my town.  They slowed down beside me and the woman on the back looked at me and yelled. "This is one hell of a hill, you are doing GREAT!"  They both gave me thumbs up and went on their way.   I had been riding out of my saddle...which is the most difficult thing for me right now, I don't do it too much and it....well I haven't mastered it...it HURTS and my breathing gets out of whack.  SO I was out of my saddle struggling up this hill and their words helped me get to the top.  I don't know who they are...but they meant so much to me today (too bad they weren't there a mile or so later when I was struggling up the hill that undid me...haa haa haa)    Seriously, those words from a stranger meant sooo much to me.

Early this year when I was spending hours out on the battlefield pushing through the C25K training I frequently say a man.  He drove a white truck with West Virginia tags and has a very short fat poodle (seriously, this dog is as wide as she is tall).  I was doing intervals so I was walking a lot of the time and got a chance to stop and pet the dog.  This man NEVER failed to talk to me.   Then I hit the  big wall that you hit during that C25K training..that first 20 minute straight run was a rough one.  I was doing it and pushing through the last few minutes, determined to finish it no matter what.  This man walked by me and said "I've been watching you the last weeks.  You are doing it and it makes me proud and happy to watch your transformation".  I said thanks and didn't even stop to pet the pup because I HAD to finish that straight run to prove it to myself.   I saw him numerous times after that.  We always said hi and I always gave his doggy some attention.   I need to thank him for his words.......they meant so much.  (Unfortunately, after I made the decision to thank him...I've not run into him!)

So compliment people.......encourage people........it has a PROFOUND affect!

PS  I WILL conquer that hill very SOON!!

Jack of all Trades, Master of None

In my personal life I have taken on that roll.  I love so many crafts.  I love to quilt, so I will start quilting. I’m in my glory and gung ho to quilt forever.  I make plans and forge full steam ahead.  But then a few days….or a few weeks…..or maybe even a few months later and I get bored with quilting and something else catches my eye. Cross stitch!  Yes, I LOVE cross stitching.  So I immerse myself in that for a few hours, days …….   Until I get bored or until something else catches my eye….oh my word, Scrapbooking.  So much Fun! There are so many things….and eventually I do come around full cycle and pick up the quilting again, or pick up the cross stitch or crochet.  However,   I flit from hobby to hobby.  It could be a lack of attention span. (ha ha ha)    Because of this, I call myself a Jack of All Trades, Master of None.  I don’t really ‘master’ anything.  I dabble with lots.  I have a very good working knowledge of a lot of different things. I’m a true renaissance woman!  Sometimes that bothers me, it would be awesome to excel at one thing versus being good at a lot.  But that’s how I roll.  I can’t change my nature, my personality nor who I am. 

 

Earlier this year, I started to really pour myself into exercise.  I was riding, running, zumba-ing, playing tennis with my husband (or at least doing something that WE called playing tennis), walking with a friend.  I was doing so much and I was loving every second of it. (cue the grim reaper music) Then I had the dreaded foot issue crop up in late June.  I was advised of a few options for exercise.  The main options on the table were to use an elliptical, ride a bike or go swimming.   Swimming was off the table as a regular thing as you need access to a pool…and in fact I’ve not been able to swim at all.  I had grand plans to get to the gym to use the elliptical, but that didn’t happen either.  I did however get on my bike.  And I struggled to maintain any continuity with biking.  (granted, I had some blows during that time…in the form of hurling my guts up one week….some emotional issues another….but still).  I was perplexed.  I had been exercising religiously and all of a sudden it became a struggle.  I couldn’t understand it.

 

This week it clicked.  I went back to zumba on Wednesday night.  My foot did fine.  There were a few times in the choreography that my foot shot pain, but mostly it was a dull ache….so anytime those steps came up, I just marched in place.  I pushed it further and tried to run on Thursday night.  I was absolutely giddy with excitement when I was heading out.   The foot is giving me a bit of grief today and the jury is out if I’ll be able to restart running on a regular basis….but I learned a lesson about myself.  While I get bored and like variety in my crafts and hobbies……I am the same way with my exercise.  Variety is the key to my success.  I LOVE mybike.  I love the wind in my face and the sound of the wheels on the pavement (or if I’m on my trek the sound of the wheels crunching the pebbles on the canal). I enjoy it.   But doing it every day with no other variety added in doesn’t work for me.  Because you see, I love running. I love the feeling of pushing myself and the little sweat rivulets that run down my back and the feeling of my feet hitting the pavement, the slow moving scenery and the way my mind works when I run. (it does take a totally different path then when I’m biking…both are good….just different for some reason).  Zumba is immensely fun…maybe no longer as high intensity as I need, but still just fun and still a good workout.  It’s a social hour for me.  It’s a place where I can get my sweat on but also interact with people.   It is exercise, but totally different for me.   Tennis…same thing, good but different.  That is husband time….it’s still moving and active.  I still work up a sweat (I don’t enjoy that sweat as much as I really do love the running sweat) but it’s time to spend with my husband.  Walking. My walks with Sherry are Sacred.  Don’t mess with our walk!   Variety.  I would still treasure my walks with sherry, but if I only walked every day, I would quickly grow bored.  If I played tennis everyday I would quickly grow bored. One activity does not work for me.   I in fact admire people that can do the same thing day in and day out….but that’s just not something I can do….and I just realized that it is not only in crafts…but it’s in my exercise…I need variety!

 

On that same note.  I may always be a jack of all trades with some of these crafts. I’m ok with that. It’s good to dabble in and know a bit about a lot.  But I’m not going to be a jack of all trades with my exercise.  I am mastering the road bike.  My body doesn’t ache on a regular basis (for days afterward too) when I ride. Yeah, I have days where I feel a little stiffness or whatnot, but not the God awful aches that I had when I first started.   I still am not very fast and hills still are excruciating….but I’m getting better and I WILL master it!  Running.  I was running about a 11 ½ to12 minute mile when I was injured.  That was still slower than where I wanted to be but it was miles faster then where I was in January.  I will figure out this foot thing and I will get back to running and I will conquer!  

 

Hmmm…maybe I really SHOULD think more seriously about a multi-disciplinarian sport such as a…..wait for it……..a triathlon…….

 

 

So today…my heel aches a bit…I was going to leave it un-taped today (for a break) but I was walking and it was aching quite a bit so I decided to tape it to give that extra support.  It really does seem to ease it up.   Someone asked me in my messages what is this KT tape.  It is an athletic tape that is super sticky…and super stretching.  When applied correctly (different applications for different muscles and tendons) it relieves the pressure of movement and stress upon those muscles and tendons.  I usually forget it’s on my foot (unlike braces and wraps that start to annoy, itch and dig into me and cause me to feel like that part of my body is a furnace after a few hours).  It is touted to be something that stays on for a few days.  I’ve found that I have to replace it within 24 hours…..but in fairness, that could be due to the fact that it is on my foot…so it’s getting more use, friction and wear and tear versus a shoulder or a knee.  I have been able to wear the sleeping foot thing at night even with my foot taped.  It really is a cool product.  Is it the placebo affect?   Who knows….but I really do sincerely believe it helps. 

 

So I bought new running shoes and used them yesterday (they are spiffy looking too) and they rubbed a blister.  GRRRRR  Hoepfully it’s just a ‘break them in’ issue!