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Friday, July 13, 2012

Part of life...

Well, yesterday....I didn't eat during the day because of a rough morning.  I got home from work at 6 and I wanted nothing more than to........fall into bed and let the emotions that I'd struggled to keep bottled up all day inside wash over me.  (bet you thought I was going to say eat.  LOL) .  I did just that.  I couldn't really handle doing anything other than that.    By8:30 I got up and we went out for a sandwich (I got turkey and brie...side of corn salad....we split some artichoke dip...and I had some ice cream).   I didn't eat all that horrible...probably well within my caloric range (I'll go back and change my tracker for yesterday to show what I really ate versus what I had planned to eat...just haven't done it yet).  But I knew that eating late...eating not at all over the day...etc etc etc would really "F" with my body.  So this morning I chose to not weigh myself.  I made it until I was in the kitchen packing my lunch.  And then I mosied back intot he bathroom......and weighed myself...fully clothed....  Yeah, I was up 2 pounds.  GRRR   I know it's because of my weird day (sodium at dinner...not used to diet soda...which has more sodium than my normal water)....and of course that TOM action that has been threatening to pull into the station may or may not be here.  (seriously...this month is just ODD.....)  Even knowing that, it's disheartening to see.  Not gonna make me give up...and may just make me redouble my efforts this weekend to recoup my 'gain'.  So maybe it will work to my advantage!

This is a healthy lifestyle that I want.  It's not a diet.  It means that I will have odd days...odd months....odd happenings that will affect my weight.  I'm ok with that.  I know that I do have to figure out my stress and emotions though.  Losing weight when your mind is drowning in a hurt that threatens to overtake you is not the optimum scenario.   But that is part of life...learning how to overcome despite these detractors. (or maybe IN spite of them.)